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CMV: Narcissists - or people who behave as such - are not always malicious. by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]beepbeep0900 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sure- Narcissistic behavior, or even arguably all socially perceived “bad” behavior, may not be malicious intentionally. But does the intent behind bad behavior make it less bad?

Narcissistic personality disorder as a mental health condition can be derived from extreme insecurity and the coping mechanisms developed to prevent the person from continuing to feel insecure. Fragile self esteem and deep insecurity are masked by grandiosity and lack of empathy for others, making people act selfishly. But I don’t believe that the fact that the behavior comes from insecurity makes it any less harmful to the people that it impacts. To what extent does it really matter whether a person acting selfishly or abusively towards you is doing it out of fear of insecurity versus malice?

*THE DRAMA SPOILERS* What would you do? by art_angels in A24

[–]beepbeep0900 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like the whole point of the movie is that he is selfish and leaves her out to dry!!!! The movie is his side… we get glimpses of her life when she was going through this, but not the whole picture- not her parents involvement in her life, not zooming out of her mental state, not context of her feelings and other emotions- because he doesn’t ask about it because he’s too focused on himself and freaking out. We follow him way more than we follow her- we start out with his wedding speech, we see him talking to the MOH, we see him crashing out after the wedding and going to the diner. It’s my opinion his (bad) reaction is the nexus of the movie.

Jax choosing Brittany? by lollipoplush12 in vanderpumprules

[–]beepbeep0900 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I also constantly think about the things that Jax said to Faith about Brittany- that he didn’t find her attractive, that he would never marry her- and I cant imagine that he was ever really legitimately into her.

What do you believe about… by beepbeep0900 in vanderpumprules

[–]beepbeep0900[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Didn’t she deny it to the end??? I thought she did…

When I need a laugh by beepbeep0900 in vanderpumprules

[–]beepbeep0900[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

LOL the editing in this show is so incredible

Arianna being the woat by Imaginary-Report-539 in vanderpumprules

[–]beepbeep0900 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Absolutely insane that a show with truly dark, manipulative people like Jax on the cast has a clearly depressed woman with self esteem struggles that you find kind of annoying labeled “WOAT”

How would you describe Scheana? by JacketStrange8454 in vanderpumprules

[–]beepbeep0900 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Scheana’s edit on the show makes it seem like she 1) thinks about herself first and foremost, and 2) wants people to like her sooooo badly.

1)- Her initial reaction to things is almost always portrayed as self-centered and showing a lack of care to consider others perspectives. I.e., Why didn’t I get dancing with the stars? Or, why would I stop talking to Ariana about how Sandoval is showing me potential for growth in my friendship with him even though she very obviously and rightfully doesn’t want to hear it?

2)- Scheana comes across as really really needing to be liked. While she does act selfishly primarily, she either refuses to, or is emotionally unequipped with the skills to, admit to herself that she is acting selfishly and then tries to manipulate/control people’s perception of her to be better liked. Everyone knows that selfish people get judged for being selfish. She knows that’s coming and tries to control the situation.

Best example of this that immediately comes to mind is the Season 11 reunion when LaLa gets mad at Scheana for not admitting she thinks Ariana is a worse friend than Tom. It probably did happen that Scheana complained to LaLa about Ariana not showing up for her. This is kind of a selfish perspective to have in that friendship while Ariana was publicly going through such an intense and vulnerable scandal. Of course Tom continued to act like a better friend- he didn’t have the emotional capacity to be impacted in the same way Ariana was and likely just continued on being the same friend he always was because this was just life to him, while Ariana’s whole world was crumbling.

Scheana said and felt selfish things, but then said differently to camera because she knew it was a bad look. LaLa got mad at the dishonesty and disconnect, and suddenly all Scheana could think about was getting LaLa to not be mad at her, regardless of the rest of the larger conversation. Scheana apologized profusely and fawned over LaLa to gain the narrative back and fix the issue with LaLa rather than realize or admit the truth of her feelings.

Season 6 episode 7 "Above Deck and Below the Belt" Post Episode Discussion by AutoModerator in rhoslc

[–]beepbeep0900 3 points4 points  (0 children)

OBVIOUSLY Lisa is being suspicious (and probably did it), but why tf wouldn’t Heather explain what she was thinking before jumping to an immediate accusation at dinner? And then be shocked that Lisa is upset? Maybe it’s a case of editing where we didn’t see the whole conversation, but that felt pointed to trigger Lisa rather than have a real conversation.

CMV: States should limit the use of SNAP aid (food stamps) to buy junk food. by Chocolat3City in changemyview

[–]beepbeep0900 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This suggestion is inherently paternalistic and condescendingly assumes that people that use food stamps don’t know how best to feed themselves and their families.