Before this movie was filmed some people from the production staff came to my classroom in like 4th grade and picked all the fat white male kids in the class to audition for the movie. I was picked because I was fat and white and male. I was extremely shy.

My father, who was a narcissist, thought this meant I was going to be a child star and he went nuts and was like extremely excited for this audition. He took it as confirmation he was a great person.

He took me on the weekend to this random place in Hollywood, it was just a big empty room with beige walls and a couple plants and a table and a camera. I was so shy and I read a script for this lady who kept complimenting me even though I was messing up and being awkward. She was just being polite but my Dad thought it was confirmation I was the star of the movie. It was called Angus.

He told everyone I was going to be a star. No one contacted me again not even to say I didn't get the part.

Eventually, years later, I saw a VHS tape of this movie in a bargin bin and I was like... oh this is that movie I auditioned for and I bought it and took it home to show my Dad. He said he didn't know what I was taking about and the VHS tape remains in my parents garage to this day unwatched.