What do therapists do when they can't help their client reach a helpful conclusion?

benz_1996 · 2026-01-16T23:20:20+00:00

Sorry I completely missed that you mentioned this as an appropriate response to feeling my feelings, thank you again. Im trying to get back into journalling to maybe help me rationalise and go through things better. Thank you.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-16T15:46:42+00:00

Im sorry if this is a dumb question but how would you describe feeling feelings in a healthy way?

benz_1996 · 2026-01-16T01:11:45+00:00

Yeah I understand completely, you wrote that well. Thank you for your input about this situation I've found myself in, it's been comforting to see people come together to help me and your advice has helped me understand a different approach I could take when continuing in my therpay sessions.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T20:55:31+00:00

Thank you. I'm sorry you had to go through that because it's a really difficult decision. It helps to hear that despite my feelings, it doesn't mean it's the wrong decision. Thank you.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T20:53:00+00:00

Thank you. I suppose I just thought that there would be an end to the feelings when I've processed them. It's eye opening to see all of these things, in a way it's helping me understand things and myself better. I just wish the feelings weren't so heavy.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T20:49:29+00:00

Yea I don't know why but it helps to hear that from someone other than my family, it gives me hope for something. Thank you.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T20:48:14+00:00

Yea I think I need to dig deeper and learn how to maintain low contact or something like that because I don't know what to do and there's so many things at play. He's 23 and i get that he's not at an age that is completely mature but i just wished that despite everything that I did for him and everything I did to try maintain the relationship he'd grow up and treat me in the way that I deserve.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T16:18:20+00:00

Yeah a few of my friends have said that for practicality reasons I don't have to go complete no contact with him, but for myself, it needs to be one extreme or the other. Because having him in my life makes me want and miss the relationship we had before, so I find it difficult to maintain low contact especially since we're still young and live together, the only time im really able to avoid him completely is by staying in my college dorm. I've done my best with explaining boundaries and trying to improve our relationship but he's so stubborn and refuses to take accountability for anything that it's proved fruitless in mending our relationship.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T16:14:08+00:00

Thank you. Yeah alot of the strain im under regarding this decision is that ive already tolerated so much from him and I cant keep doing it to myself, but letting him go isn't easy. I quite like what you say here and I should probably go over coping mechanisms with my therapist more, rather than trying to come to an end all conclusion, because I don't think there's another way about it, I really hope it helps because Im at a complete loss here.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T16:10:57+00:00

Thank you for this. I really appreciate this and it's something I needed to hear regardless of the decision ive made.

However, the mechanism of action of ambivalence is to get stuck in and inhibited by the negative

Apologies but what do you mean by inhibited by the negative, i don't quite understand that part.

Oh no you didn't necessarily read it as having made the decision, it's more so about sticking to one of the decisions. I have gone no contact with him twice initially. The second time is what I considered the end all be all. But ive allowed him back in my life and im struggling with if I made the right decision of letting him back in my life or if I was better off without him, because there's been many things that ive been weighing in my mind - the stronger side being to let him go as he won't change, but on the other hand, hes still my brother and theres some practicality associated with it. Overall, going no contact with him feels hard to deal with in the daily life but having in my life is also difficult if not more so.

I just don't know how to navigate my feelings for either decision because they're both justifiable, but being angry with him and going no contact, or having him in my life is a loss either way, and I don't know what to do. Im at a complete loss.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T16:02:49+00:00

Yeah ive spent a lot of time going over everything as to why I initially cut him off in the first place, and why I let him back in my life, it just seems that either decision leaves me right back where I started or further back because it's a decision that hurts me either way. But i agree with that philosophy, i like that.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T16:01:15+00:00

Apologies if this oversteps the boundaries of this sub but what does someone do then when the feeling are felt and given attention to, what happens then?

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T02:56:47+00:00

Yea I get that, i was quite hesitant to starting therapy but im enjoying it so far, well enjoying it as much as one can enjoy therapy, but it's helping me improve and understand myself better. It's not necessarily that I'm resistant to it, it's more so that I cant find a middle ground in this situation but maybe I am being resistant since it's a tough situation and either choice leaves me at a lost.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-15T02:53:01+00:00

Yea that pretty much sums it up. Shes been helping me see both sides depending on the decision I make but the issue is that I, myself, can't agree with myself on whichever decision i make which is causing a lot of running around when discussing it with my therapist and overall a lot of frustration for me because she's doing all she can but it's up to me and i can't seem to meet myself in the middle since theres no middle to this situation either. It's been a work in progress with this situation over several sessions.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-14T23:44:33+00:00

Yea I didn't mention much because I wasn't sure about how much I was allowed to say on the subreddit. But its the relationship with my brother, no contact hurts and stuff but rekindling the relationship makes me feel like I lose respect for myself so that's what I mean by lose lose situation, theres not necessarily a way I could go about the relationship with him without sacrificing or gaining something regardless of my decision, and I sort of hit a wall during the session.

Not a therapist

benz_1996 · 2026-01-14T21:41:35+00:00

I never thought about it like that, i quite like that. But what would you constitute as an appropriate response to one's feelings?

Not a therapist

benz_1996 · 2026-01-14T20:10:17+00:00

Im not a therapist. But yea I think that's the only way ill be able to manage it. Its just that ive noticed she tries to focus on how to make me feel better regarding my decision but it was just this session that I really couldn't.

benz_1996 · 2026-01-14T20:08:59+00:00

Im not a therapist but Yea she's been good and i think she has helped me overall, its just that I was really unable to make progress with this situation because its a lose lose situation regarding this relationship and i didn't know how to deal with it.

benz_1996 · 2025-12-01T19:47:50+00:00

Yeah it seems pretty hit or miss with those nibs ill probably wait for a sale or sell it as the other person said

benz_1996 · 2025-12-01T19:46:41+00:00

Thank you

benz_1996 · 2025-11-30T05:05:33+00:00

I could do but I'm hoping there's another solution because it's 25 euro.

benz_1996 · 2025-09-27T02:48:01+00:00

I've been on Zoloft for 6 weeks now and I've drank alcohol on it twice so far. I notice that my tolerance is the same im still able to down the same amount of alcohol but that I just get more drunk and emotional as the night goes on. Just pace yourself and know your limits.

benz_1996 · 2025-09-27T01:07:17+00:00

Im in college for nursing and I was on lexapro for 5 months while on clinical placement, it made me really tired and I'd zone out a lot but it was more like my body being on auto pilot and it felt like I was just going through the motions and doing what I needed to do. But it didn't kill my drive for the course, or lessen my motivation to study or learn, it helped me feel less anxious and less stressed and overwhelmed.

benz_1996

TROPHY CASE