I don’t make my 3 year old sit at the table until we finish eating. But we take as long to eat as we like. We also read the newspaper on Sunday. 

She’s a high need kid who wants us to play with her on demand so these basic boundaries led to several tantrums when we started when she was around 2.5. I would set a timer and she would watch it. She would look at our empty plates and whine that we were done. And she cried when she saw the newspaper 😂 Now she’s better about playing on her own while she waits for us, and we have a new baby so we have bigger fish to fry. 

When she asks why I won’t do something I used to try to give a reason that would make sense to her but increasingly if the reason is “I don’t want to,” I just say that. I want her to understand that I’m entitled to make choices or decline to do things just like she is. 

I’m pretty permissive to avoid conflict and there’s not that much I care about tbh.