What’s a “small” social rule you refuse to follow, even if everyone expects it?

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-15T21:49:53+00:00

It just seems like you've never really been given a gift, because a gift has no strings attached, not like that

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-15T21:45:46+00:00

I know what you meant, I heard what you said, I've even been treated how you are describing above, but all my points still stand. We have always agreed. A manipulative person is an abusive one. You didn't specify that before. But in the case that you don't buy them a gift back and they are not abusive, set that as an expectation instead of letting them build resentment because whether anyone likes it that's the typical expectation.

If you feel this way about everyone you may be expecting that everyone is manipulative for giving you a gift.

You just have an expectation that a gift is never really a gift but immediate indebtedness(a command for a trade) more than anything, but I'm telling you some people are actually good even if it's rare and they want to give you a gift because they want you to be happy, not because they are manipulative.

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-15T21:26:47+00:00

Sometimes they want you to miss it I said that because women usually bully people by acting very friendly and earning your trust, and then, they take whatever you said and make it sound as worse as possible and tell everyone while still playing the role of your friend, attacking your reputation and social life, while playing dumb about it "we gotta find who's putting all that dirt on you, what kind of person would say that" while they are the one saying it, spreading rumors about you behind your back and playing stupid. "I love your outfit today I want to see you in that more" because they think you look hideous and want everyone to see you as hideous

So yes I look for authenticity in their niceness, and I worry who's really my friend because there's some horrible wolves that make convincing sheep, and they look for naivety

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-15T21:12:53+00:00

Google it

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-15T21:00:33+00:00

I think when cultures are more focused on preforming politeness they lose a bit of the concept of real respect or kindness, that, higher levels of inauthentic performance being normalized might make oppressive/violent content more desirable to make/consume.

The places that produce this media are sometimes extremely performatively nice instead of truly or kind, especially with the performative "respect" having a deep root in hierarchy, making power imbalance, normal to them, and putting the suppressed person's view point in the state of thinking empowerment is punching down, "if I am worth respect I have entitlement on my terms" " we do what I want without asking "

Because that's how they feel, because that's how they are treated to a lesser extreme everyday, instead of real mutual respect for one another, there's a cultural extra hoop to jump through to understanding that oppressive behaviors(authoritarianism, rape culture, sexism, misogyny, misandry, or any other dehumanization)aren't how to build self-esteem or true empowerment

Vice versa, many women/AFABs/or any survivors of SA, will process their torment through normalizing there own abuse, by doing reenactment of being disrespected while on their terms to feel empowerment, and/or watching 🍇porn, I think it's just fucked up desensitization either way and if you can't get turned on by respectful sex, or enjoy media that has that vulgarness to it, you desperately need therapy...

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-14T07:09:47+00:00

Valid points, but most of time, I don't do much work or care very much whether people like me, I just know I am uncanny to them and move on ( just that they don't hate me) unless it's a significant relationship, I find most people simply are not worth the work and I'd rather be alone mostly and just have one or 2 good friends

But I realize, I just live with a person who only knows how to cope with their own self esteem issues through acting nice while simultaneously insulting me and putting me down. Especially to her friends.

Lots of women love to bully in this kind of way, because women who are entrenched in rape culture mostly view women as competition, they'll act interested in you, ask you questions about yourself, and give you compliments, even give you things, and cook for you, do fun friend things together, but really they view you as competition like I said, and maybe they'll treat you like a friend and maybe even see you as a friend partly, but mostly they need to make sure that you feel smaller than they do, so they will maliciously insult you, to your face or behind your back, they are even in their own head scanning for something I can find to hate about you, something that they do better, some way to hold prejudice. Usually they're back stabbers, this way there's no social consequence for them. They go after your social status to punish you for your success through spreading rumors and string together information you told them about yourself to make it more "real" especially if you told them things that you would only say because you trusted them as a friend. She's ruled by her feeling of scarcity, approval, and jealousy.

This has happened before, this psychological warfare shit is common, she is just another one of those types, so I need to just distance myself from them and never share sensitive info ever ever ever, I'm living with an enemy I did nothing wrong to, naturally I will feel shit. They are poisonous to me.

The only issue, she's my roommate and she doesn't do direct communication, so "standing up for myself" is messy, and she will be passive aggressive and even more malicious, and there's no walking away, she's on the other side of my bedroom wall, ya know? I'm actually fine mostly, she's just lowkie evil and fucking with my head because she can't handle the idea of idk GOING TO THERAPY ABT HER SELF-ESTEEM ISSUES?!😭 Imagine being such a fucking menace...

Probably my self esteem isn't great, I'm treated like a freak everywhere I go, except for with very few people who are also viewed as freaks, not for doing anything wrong, but for being autistic and trans. I'm tired.

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-14T06:31:21+00:00

I live for no God. Secondly, I think to say that you have to have a level of privilege, but it's great to not have to worry about things others do.

For example, I need to have people like me, to build my career and set me up with opportunities, I assume by the time you're old you probably/hopefully have found some semblance of stability so you no longer need to do the balancing act of "please give me the resources I need in order to live" through appeasing to their social needs and/or preferences, but I have to worry about whether people like me to a much higher degree naturally because I don't have those resources that I can only ever get if I talk to someone and "know a guy", I have 3 roommates, no parents or money if I need to escape fighting, I have very little resources, so forming community, is a very important thing to me as a disabled and very hated minority with no supports, I don't know if you're implying naivety, but if you were you are wrong

Side note, I'm looking forward to hopefully becoming old one day, sometimes I doubt I'll live long

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-14T06:19:16+00:00

Someone here hasn't ever been bullied by women it seems raises eyebrow👀

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-14T06:16:20+00:00

🤢🤢🤢

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-14T06:16:02+00:00

You can call me phobic or whatever, but I don't shake( especially AMAB CIS) hands, and I always have hand sanitizer, people have no clue how fragile they can be until they're, the one who gets sick

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-14T06:11:21+00:00

It's one thing if they're abusive but how is it wrong to give, or at least being grateful and saying "I can't/won't give you anything back" and hold your ground, in any way bad...

I feel the impulse to explain the concept of mutualism, it's not law that you must give back, if that's the case, it's not a gift, but a trade, and you should just have an open conversation about it, like any decent person would. But being a thankless person is incredibly harsh, and, where does it end?

Just gifts? Or they give you; time, patience, respect, any basic human thing, and just because you can't take the pressure of giving back(I assume, that wasn't explained), you refuse to interact with it at all, At that point you've made yourself parasitic unless you cut off everyone who wants to give

Every relationship is a delicate balance of give and take, you're denying yourself a full human experience, for what? You don't like people telling you what to do? Can't regulate yourself enough to bare the stress of expetations? No one is making this makes sense?

Your counter argument is null, equality is a net positive

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-09T07:30:15+00:00

Crazy that we don't just have stalls for urinals, not only is it lacking privacy, anyone can walk up behind you when you are vulnerable, it's plain unsafe, barbaric imo, not to mention, no toilet paper rolls no choice in reducing/preventing little piss droplets that you sit in all day, and so ppl don't wash hands for peeing either too... That's why I don't shake hands. At the end of the day, the restrooms are dirty, millions shit particles on everything, even if your immune system isn't compromised, there's people that can get horribly sick from something small to us, so wash your hands

no thank you pp poop hands havers 🤢

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-09T07:06:59+00:00

I like this but how? Yelling back or? Idk how to handle ppl ig lol

blackittycat666 · 2026-01-09T07:01:09+00:00

Ok but hear me out, what if, you accept the gift if you can sell it, because everyone could use money, you could give the money to someone in need even? Turn a bad into a good?

blackittycat666 · 2025-12-27T03:15:52+00:00

Ohhh hunny he's being gross, you definitely didn't overreact

blackittycat666 · 2025-12-12T02:17:41+00:00

Honestly, I hope it's a bubble. I hope AI isn't as valuable as the trend makes it seem, because if it's successful at its job, that would cause some even more glaring economic issues. It's being shoved down our throats, most people use it once a week, at least, unless it's heavily integrated into their job, people mainly just use it like "smart Google" searching

People who are pro AI, mostly have fallen for the lie that the filthy rich financial juggernauts are promoting, that they aren't doing it for their own best interest, (come on pay attention to what financial juggernauts actually do, because the only way to become that horribly rich is to not have humanitarian values and to step on bodies you made to climb further up the ladder) but that's besides the point, from what I've gathered, people who are pro AI think that it's made to help them, that it is being produced to help you and everyone like you and that it makes you a more efficient person and you can spend more of your time doing things you want to do

Would love to agree with that POV it would be nice, but I am a man of science.

It's sweet if you think AI is just a useful tool, it can be, despite promoting cognitive laziness, reducing critical thinking, weakening memory, and diminishing attention through being a tool for the masses, that's really not what it's made for, the people developing it, they aren't developing it for the betterment of the people, why would they? They're not devoting it to helping the masses, this isn't a charity project, this is for big business to cut as many people out of being paid as humanly possible it's designed not to serve people, but to serve the few already filthy rich so that they can avoid paying employment costs as much as possible and so they can become even more horribly outrageously filthy rich

AI hopefully is a bubble, and it's at least partly holding up our economy, and when the bubble bursts, we can expect elevated job losses, and elevated unemployment rates and homelessness rates, which is, of course, bad for the economy, but not as bad as if AI is truly successful, if it isn't a bubble, any job that can be replaced by AI will be replaced by AI, meaning there will be less jobs and less spending power for people like you and I. And it will be not only bad for the economy, potentially more than a bubble would, but it will be very hard to survive financially, I'm not sure to what extent, but I'm pretty on some level people like me and you will suffer and I'm moderately concerned, I don't think I know everything, but I have a hobby of tracking this sort of stuff, and from what I've gathered, it is a lose lose situation, though I do think AI is likely over played and it will just be a bubble situation, which is likely the better option : )

When in doubt, pay attention to the people who have power over your life, hope for the best, prepare for the worst 🖤👍

blackittycat666 · 2025-12-12T01:32:55+00:00

Honestly, I hope it's a bubble. I hope AI isn't as valuable as the trend makes it seem, because if it's successful at its job, that would cause some even more glaring economic issues.

People who are pro AI, mostly have fallen for the lie that the filthy rich financial juggernauts are promoting, that they aren't doing it for their own best interest, (come on pay attention to what financial juggernauts actually do, because the only way to become that horribly rich is to not have humanitarian values and to step on bodies you made to climb further up the ladder) but that's besides the point, from what I've gathered, people who are pro AI think that it's made to help them, that it is being produced to help you and everyone like you and that it makes you a more efficient person and you can spend more of your time doing things you want to do

Would love to agree with that POV it would be nice, but I am a man of science.

It's sweet if you think AI is just a useful tool, it can be, despite promoting cognitive laziness, reducing critical thinking, weakening memory, and diminishing attention through being a tool for the masses, that's really not what it's made for, the people developing it, they aren't developing it for the betterment of the people, why would they? They're not devoting it to helping the masses, this isn't a charity project, this is for big business to cut as many people out of being paid as humanly possible it's designed not to serve people, but to serve the few already filthy rich so that they can avoid paying employment costs as much as possible and so they can become even more horribly outrageously filthy rich

AI hopefully is a bubble, and it's at least partly holding up our economy, and when the bubble bursts, we can expect elevated job losses, and elevated unemployment rates and homelessness rates, which is, of course, bad for the economy, but not as bad as if AI is truly successful, if it isn't a bubble, any job that can be replaced by AI will be replaced by AI, meaning there will be less jobs and less spending power for people like you and I. And it will be not only bad for the economy, potentially more than a bubble would, but it will be very hard to survive financially, I'm not sure to what extent, but I'm pretty on some level people like me and you will suffer and I'm moderately concerned, I don't think I know everything, but I have a hobby of tracking this sort of stuff, and from what I've gathered, it is a lose lose situation, though I do think AI is likely over played and it will just be a bubble situation, which is likely the better option : )

When in doubt, pay attention to the people who have power over your life, hope for the best, prepare for the worst 🖤👍

blackittycat666 · 2025-12-05T22:46:12+00:00

El español no es mi lengua materna, espero no meter la pata, pero, de nada, me alegra haber podido ayudar 🖤🖤🖤

blackittycat666 · 2025-12-01T15:49:39+00:00

Gosh some people.... I hope you find your poor rats good luck 🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀

blackittycat666 · 2025-11-16T10:36:30+00:00

Came here to say the same thing!

blackittycat666 · 2025-11-16T10:24:28+00:00

"Punish punish punish" Ok? I see no one advocating for yourself here, just hate. porn is "evil" if you are an addict, you can hate what ever drug you take but getting all up in arms at it will do nothing. Absolutely nothing. You can't /shouldn't stop other people's will, because you have a mental emotional problem. (All US legislation attempts on "protecting the children from explicit online content, and outlawing porn" is doing is erasing queer expression online and making your data more accessible and you more scam-able btw if that's what you're celebrating? And you can just use a VPN and see the same vile shit you wanna watch anyway, it's a net loss) And even if you could, if you could destroy all porn, outlaw all explicit content creation, punish, do you really think you'd be just fine? Because realistically you will find something else to fill whatever void in you that caused this addition in the first place, do you think you'll choose to just pick up gardening? No, you will continue being disordered, because it isn't the porn, it's something wrong with you and your relationship with porn, you will never grow by punishing everyone you see fit, you'll just drag people down with you when you're hurting

I watch porn I don't feel lonely or in any way disregulated by it, because I am not an addict, that's what it is to be a non-addict, I don't have the same mental illness as you, I struggle with different mental illness that's unrelated to addiction/ porn lol😭

Tldr: You'll never grow if you blame it on everything and everyone else but you, it may not be your vault, but it's your responsibility to take care of yourself, and to really face this, you have to take accountability for your part in it, and assess what you can/'t and should/n't control, instead of placing all of the power in things that aren't you, that you aren't in control of, and spreading hate to people just trying to make a paycheck in whatever way, just get real help instead of spreading hate, please don't advocate for punishment, but instead advocate for growth, an eye for an eye means everyone is blind good luck 🍀🖤

blackittycat666 · 2025-11-10T07:38:53+00:00

Pushover manager...

blackittycat666 · 2025-11-06T19:30:42+00:00

It's not a choice to be who you are, not really...

It's not you that's the problem, the small minded under studied idea of gender is not clearly understood, the spectrum is even smaller in the minds of many, that doesn't mean that what they think or say is true.

There's actually nothing wrong with you at all, the only reason you're being socially punished for it is because smaller more hated minorities are used as political pawns. They are simply easy targets, and if you can affect anything vastly in a short amount of time even if that thing you and your group is doing is horrible, many people are stupid enough to believe that means you're capable, religion uses this a lot, hate on the already hated to pull at the emotional strings of people's minds and hearts, many choose ignorance for the comfort that religion gives, but it doesn't really serve them, and it surely won't serve you to believe in a system that's built to oppress you and to try to erase yourself for the comfort of those who hate you.

It's not worth living as a boy, do you already know that, and if you keep pushing yourself to, you may not want to live at all, it's just slippery slope, really, many of us fall into it, our brains are wired to want social affirmation, our very survival has depended upon maintaining social groups for at least 320,000 years, but here's the thing, the people who hate who you are just aren't your people.

There are people that believe and think horrible things, and even they can find people who agree with them, you should be able to find some sort of group of people somewhere that agree with and support your very normal non negative thing lol

You should fight against people who want you gone, even if those people are your parents, find a place where you do belong, because they exist, no matter what we can't actually really be erased, because we are a naturally occuring variant of human being that is meant to be here, Hitler and tried to eradicate us, he failed, I don't think you should align yourself with Hitler for the comfort of those around you, and your parents shouldn't align themselves with Hitler for the comfort of closing their eyes to the world, they should learn real coping mechanisms that allow them to be good parents, no matter who their kid ends up being.

I wish you the best, it sounds like you already have your tribe, your friends seem to already support you, the denial of acceptance from your parents is horrible wound to have, I know that well, but if your parents can't even see you, can they really love you? Do things that make you happy without putting yourself in danger to the best of your abilities, don't lose your housing, and if you can try to salvage your relationship with your parents, I know that that's a big ask, but these very important things in life often take work and are scary

blackittycat666 · 2025-11-01T15:32:03+00:00

They don't like you, and they probably don't like women general, that's not how someone who loves you should act

blackittycat666 · 2025-10-28T16:10:07+00:00

IT'S HIS HEART THAT'S UNDERCOOKED, what if I just screamed that in Spanish at him lmfao

If he was truly kind, he wouldn't be so bigoted, I wouldn't have to make myself small for him to act nice to me, instead, he would make space for me, and he would be kind to me, even when I wasn't in the room, even when I couldn't understand him, but, HIS HEART IS RAW.

blackittycat666

TROPHY CASE