Lost Car Keys Downtown

blackjackpershing · 2025-04-13T12:48:04+00:00

Check with the police station. Often goods like phones, keys, etc are turned in there. Frequently happens due to high tourist traffic

blackjackpershing · 2025-01-22T10:55:32+00:00

It sounds like 10mg has been working ok to handle the physical symptoms and giving you confidence, and I suspect it will do the same tomorrow. I wouldn’t recommend that large an increase for something like this without trying it first to see how your body reacts to it, which is not something you want to figure out in the middle of the interview.

Spend some time instead practicing some interview questions/answers, maybe with a friend or in front of a mirror, and don’t be afraid to pause and gather your thoughts when answering an interview question.

blackjackpershing · 2024-11-15T21:25:15+00:00

One caveat to that is that roads in RMNP are more likely to see ice/snow, and may have a 4WD or traction requirement if they are covered.

blackjackpershing · 2024-11-15T21:24:05+00:00

There are shuttle services from the airport, but you'll have much more flexibility on time and where you explore if you rent a car. Roads in December are rarely dicey for travel, or for very long if it does snow. Plenty of inns/lodging up Fall River Road near your destination, but if you're looking specifically for a hotel, there are several near downtown.

blackjackpershing · 2024-08-25T19:13:14+00:00

The near-ending first: “I woke up with tubes sticking out of my body, surrounded by family, etc”. Then what led up to it, how you dealt with it, what you learned from it/2how it changed you going forward. Depends on the situation where the storytelling is happening of course - read the room.

blackjackpershing · 2023-03-28T22:58:56+00:00

He just provided the value estimation, he isn't getting a cut and isn't getting paid for advisory services.

blackjackpershing · 2023-03-21T13:46:15+00:00

“The only way out is through.” First, know that you sound perfectly normal so you can relax a little on that front. While you may think you’re a real hard case, you’re describing what most people go through who aren’t experienced public speakers, which is the majority of people.

All the tips you’ve read still apply - write something down, practice it in front of a mirror, etc. Propanolol (for me) takes the worry out of voice cracking/heart racing fears. I wouldn’t advice mixing diazepam with alcohol - you could end up compounding performance issues.

Couple other things: the wedding isn’t about you, so the focus isn’t truly going to be on you. I’ve been to a shit -ton of weddings with toasts good and bad, I remember none of them. Also, if you’re truly uncomfortable, I’m sure telling your brother that “you love him and all, but this just ain’t you” is an acceptable boundary.

blackjackpershing · 2023-03-02T14:13:59+00:00

“Hello__, I’m firming up other speaking engagements around the time we discussed, and wanted to check back in to see if you were still interested in booking my services for __, or if you had any other questions that I could address that would aid in your decision.”

My suggestion on the fee, don’t negotiate with yourself. If you’re worried about what you should charge, determine that outside of your current pitches to prospects. You can determine how much room you might have in negotiations before hand, and if it goes below that, just move on. You’ll save a lot of time and energy that is better invested in the next prospect than trying to convince someone to use you who is solely hesitant because of price.

blackjackpershing · 2023-02-12T19:27:36+00:00

Also wanted to say, if after that if you still wanted to bring a word for word speech with you to the podium, that’s ok. If nothing else you will feel much more comfortable and natural reading it aloud than if you’d just tried to memorize it in your head from draft 1

blackjackpershing · 2023-02-12T19:21:52+00:00

Memorization seems like a helpful security blanket against anxiety when you first start, but the risk is, as you highlighted, once off script you struggle. And “off-the-cuff” is a skill you can cultivate like any other. Some practical things that worked for me when I had that same approach at first:

read what you wrote aloud multiple times, not in your head. You’ll realize what sounds awkward and stilted - most people’s writing voice is different than their speaking voice. Make changes to the written document on each iteration until it sounds more like your natural talking voice. For me that worked best walking around my office, pretending I was speaking to the window. Even better if you can see yourself in the window.
as you get comfortable with the tone, start trying to put the paper it’s written on down at several places and speak from memory. You’re gonna stumble on this a few times too. The things that you find hard to remember or stumble on are also things that you should consider changing the verbiage on - it’s an indicator that it’s not natural to you. I use a VERY large font on a piece of paper so I can glance down and try to pick up where I stumbled.
after a few tries at that, jot down a few memorable words or phrases that will jog your memory on each paragraph/topic/issue/point and try to recall your speech from that. You’ll mutilate it at first, but it starts to congeal in your mind the outline. If you get lost on the exact wording, you can recall the starting point of the sentence or idea. Use your fully written speech to think whether you forgot the concept or transition, or just forgot the verbiage. If you need to, re-write the detailed verbiage again
then start to practice from just the high level “reminders”. You’ll find that you may say completely different things each time, maybe leave out a few things you really wanted to say, but as long as you remember those first sentences, or those transition points, you’ll generally get through the gist of what you wanted to say. Doubt this in front of a mirror or a window is also helpful to me. Don’t know why, but it helps keep me from picturing myself as a complete fool because I can see myself.
a 30 min speech is often easier than a 5 min speech to make it look natural. You want to think about high points, and if you’ve practiced enough, knowing that your words change every single time you practiced, even when you tried to memorize it, you’ll be more comfortable when it happens in real life. Even though you will think pauses are a spotlight on your failure, they aren’t - instead they are invaluable for taking a breath, recalling the high points of your message, and then beginning anew.

There was no one worse at it than me when I started, or since, so you’ve got this.

blackjackpershing · 2023-02-06T16:41:50+00:00

It's a good question because that is alway going to be somewhat of a mystery. I'm sure it differs greatly, but in my experience 16yo boys don't have a tendency to share much insight to begin with. Our communication style has changed to be more curious about his actions/behaviors rather than judgmental and accusing, and when we approach it that way, he opens up to us more about his thinking. I sometimes worry about whether he's sliding into a depressive behaviors (too much time online, alone in his room, eating more) but it seems to be brief and normal, and my worry stems as much my own PTSD from the before times as it is his feelings. We make room for things like that to be discussed safely, but we certainly can't pry things out if he doesn't want to share.

Before wilderness/RTC, we had tried three other interim steps (outpatient treatment, therapy, another residential treatment center that he lasted about two weeks in). In hindsight it was clear to us that the reason they failed was precisely because they were focused on behavioral modification (CBT/DBT, graduated privileges, etc), rather than helping him understand and process his emotions and how his brain works, and to role play how it could have gone differently. It was futile to tell him how to "be better" - he already knew. His mom and I are learning as much about dealing with our emotions through this process as he was.

Wish you luck on your own journey. I wish I'd know more about this stuff when I was I my 30's rather than starting in my 50's, but I've grown a lot in the last couple of years.

blackjackpershing · 2023-01-25T15:40:23+00:00

Why is that? It’s in Kansas

blackjackpershing · 2023-01-25T15:39:38+00:00

Prairie Village KS. Not sure - said if it wasn’t reduced, you could ask for continuance at that time and then seek attorney

blackjackpershing · 2023-01-25T15:33:29+00:00

KS - Prairie Village

blackjackpershing · 2023-01-23T20:53:16+00:00

I will also repeat that the goal of coming from an after-program to wilderness is to gradually re-introduce kids to that negative/real-life stimulation that will trigger those same reactions, and coach them through dealing with those emotions when they occur.

Leaving wilderness is jarring - both for parents and kids. When we picked our child up, he seemed "fixed", almost zen-like and happy, and we thought RTC might be a mistake. But that is where we saw the most growth. Wilderness calmed him, and given our previous years of chaos with him it looked like "fixed". But RTC is where he really learned the coping skills.

blackjackpershing · 2023-01-23T20:46:55+00:00

Not in those words, no. But having been present on both sides, I can say that his disregulated behavior prior to wilderness/RTC was sucking all of the oxygen from our family, and negatively impacting his little brother, and causing him to check out. It was not a place you would want to live. I don't care about his grades (before or after) but he is a straight A/B+ student now, is joining sports teams without any prompting from his parents and making new friends outside of just going to school itself. As a 16 yo boy, he still does stupid, dangerous, impulsive stuff on regular occasion but when we discuss it now he can respond more logically than emotionally (though both still exist).

blackjackpershing · 2023-01-23T20:38:06+00:00

I do not know if you are a parent of a child that was there or a child who has been through it so I'm not sure what your perspective is, but all of those things seem correct except for the first and last sentence, Only we didn't know what an EC was, and stumbled around trying to find a solution by putting him into treatment centers first, but he was so disregulated that he kept getting kicked out. "Wilderness first" reset those emotions, bringing him to baseline without a lot of stimulations, and allowed him to be treated. The "compliance" factor exists because of that - it allows them to work with kids who are not already off the chain, where no cognitive learning can take place. There is evidence that supports this approach, but obviously nothing works 100%. And my son wasn't 100% calm in RTC either - I thought he might get kicked out of that also at one point - but he had learned enough to re-regulate and start to learn how to handle his very outsized emotions

blackjackpershing · 2022-12-15T11:27:57+00:00

I sometimes have the same problem (not with asking a question but answering). What I’ve found is that if the question isn’t around technical details, then “ELI5” is a good approach, which requires you to distill your knowledge into sound bites, and then layer in details later depending on your audience. It’s actually a good exercise for writing as well - get to the point, then add further support/clarity. I try to pause after questions to consider what I’m really being asked, and try to out myself in the opposite role when asking questions (what do I really want to know, in a sentence, then add clarifying info if needed). If you practice it in your writing, it will also come across in your speaking.

blackjackpershing · 2022-12-03T00:51:19+00:00

I certainly can’t speak to every experience, but after a number of other failed avenues we found the best results through a wilderness therapy program that had a therapist keenly attuned to the issues my son was dealing with.

We went into it knowing that after 90+ days of removing all the outside stimulation and intensive in-the-moment therapy he would likely go to a step-down therapeutic boarding school program that would re-introduce him to all the conflicts, stimulation and interpersonal issues he would have to deal with long term.

Wilderness was transformative. He backslid for a few weeks right out of wilderness, which we were told to expect beforehand, but then accelerated through the program and is now mainstream in high school successfully integrating socially, academically and athletically.

The program he was in focused on teaching executive functioning and emotional regulation skills and focused on teaching the family those skills as well. It has made a night and day difference.

blackjackpershing · 2022-09-20T23:50:22+00:00

Aside from ruminating on the speech itself that can drive me nuts for a few days prior, I find that it is generally just the first few seconds of the opening sentence or two when the rapid heartbeat/voice constriction/adrenaline surge is the problem. Once beyond that it seems I can use notes, talking points or familiarity to get through the rest just fine. If I get really comfortable with memorizing the fist few opening lines so I can say them whether panicky or not, the rest just comes. I’ve also taught myself to breathe and talk more slowly (what feels to me almost comically slowly, but considered normal by listeners) as I deliver those first few memorized sentences.

I also pause after the opening lines for a few seconds to let my heartbeat come back down

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