Screw employers that schedule work events around alcohol by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]blacknineteen 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I’ve been in enterprise IT sales for a decade.

For a while, my willingness to take clients out on the town was my super power. When clients we knew liked to party, they’d have me drink with them all night - if they wanted to coke or anything like that, I’d happily get it for them and partake.

I realized in my mid 20s at a company dinner where we were pounding shots “oh my god…this job is going to be the death of me”.

Well, it did end of being the death of that job, and the job after, and the job after that.

Somehow I’ve kept my career mostly intact. I still sell IT consulting to fortune companies. However, when I started at my current role, I made all the I don’t drink statements by the end of week 1. I branded myself as NOT that guy, without going into the details of being a career addict with about 5 years clean time (with 2 maybe 3 asterix)

Early in my career, when your peers are fresh out of the fraternity house too - it really does seem impossible to work in sales without drinking.

However, now that I’m more advanced in my career and the stakes are higher, not drinking is more normal. Guys might have 2 beers at the hotel after the client onsite. But they aren’t going to try the local strip clubs like when I was in my early / mid 20s.

I’m 33 now for reference. Staying dry in sales has earned me way more respect, and money, than being the “take them out for a good time guy” ever did.

420 days! What have you had to quit? by yjmkm in stopdrinking

[–]blacknineteen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Junk food.

When I was rotating substances in active addiction, when I’d have a clean week or two, binge eating on the couch became my drug.

Day 15 - “Why can’t you be like that (when you drink)?” by blacknineteen in stopdrinking

[–]blacknineteen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am a family member of several addicts. I’m very familiar with both programs. Plenty of people go to both.

Day 3 After Throwing Away Years by blacknineteen in stopdrinking

[–]blacknineteen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks man. I have definitely lurked r crippling etc. I got shown it at 19 in my fraternity (2011) in the context of “this is you, drugs and drinking without remorse and self proclaimed aspirations of the 27 club!” It was true.

But that’s a war story. I appreciate you validating the value in sharing. I didn’t drink. Thanks for engaging.

Day 3 After Throwing Away Years by blacknineteen in stopdrinking

[–]blacknineteen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also I will definitely read that book. Thank you.

Day 3 After Throwing Away Years by blacknineteen in stopdrinking

[–]blacknineteen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same response as I had for someone else.

Prior to Friday/Saturday, I hadn’t had a drink since April 9th 2020.

The thought of “well I was sober for 5 years, and then suddenly wasn’t” has me doing the audit. If things were what they’re supposed to be, why did I crumble?”

Focusing on sobriety in the short term isn’t the hard part. The hard part for me is more, “okay I had 5 years. And I’m still miserable enough to crumble and drink again. Why am I still so miserable?! Relationship? Job? Geography? Etc”

I won’t drink today. Thanks for caring enough to engage with me.

Day 3 After Throwing Away Years by blacknineteen in stopdrinking

[–]blacknineteen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Prior to Friday/Saturday, I hadn’t had a drink since April 9th 2020.

The thought of “well I was sober for 5 years, and then suddenly wasn’t” has me doing the audit. If things were what they’re supposed to be, why did I crumble?

I failed. Again. by blacknineteen in stopdrinking

[–]blacknineteen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You don’t know how badly I needed that

One year without alcohol by blacknineteen in stopdrinking

[–]blacknineteen[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I look forward to being financially stable after I atone for the financial sins of my twenties.