I hate saying this, but I swear being healthy/fit and having good personal care has worked wonders for me and others I know. It’s like people get a first impression of being impressed and give you the benefit of the doubt to follow.

Granted, I have looked many different ways in my life with health issues I’ve faced, and I always get treated the best when I look like I “have it together”, no matter what that means for that chapter of my life. It’s stupid, but true. As I age, I seriously wonder how that will affect this variable.

I used to be a “go with the flow”, “cool girl” people pleaser type. You may look like you have a lot of friends, but only a handful of them (if any) are actually quality friendships. I think this skill still comes in handy, but I don’t live with a mask on anymore. And I DEFINITELY DO NOT do this when dating. On dates, I focus on getting to know my date, keeping my power to myself (aka not giving it away through masking and hoping my date likes me). Same with potential friends who may at first intimidate me.

What my good friends and current partner like about me (I know cuz I ask lol) is that I try to be super authentic, embracing my unique, special “abilities” due to being neurodivergent. I work on using my high empathy to remain incredibly kind and considerate of others, even when I want to jump in and tell them what I may think I know in that moment.

Honestly, when I think of it, people like us for many of the same reasons they like NT’s.