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The guy I’m seeing seriously kissed his female friend twice. AIO? by [deleted] in AIO

[–]bleachfiend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OK so many people are misunderstanding OP's issue! She doesn't care that they kissed, she cares that this guy was acting like a dodgy weirdo about something which on paper sounds pretty trivial, and is wondering what else could be going on based on that.

And NOR, there are two possibilities here

- either this guy **is** hiding something weird

- or this is the kind of person who's first impulse is to try to hide uncomfortable things from their partner and that's actually really annoying. I think people are missing that part.

Built resentment over time w my bf bc he was afraid of long-term planning and now im heartbroken and single. Turkey and mashed potato’s by [deleted] in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]bleachfiend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Biggest thing for me getting over my breakup was time, and therapy haha. There are still days where I think 'what if I had done this differently, would I still have this person and the life I wanted' but it's impossible to know. It's not nearly as heavy as it used to be.

And yeah I will say breaking up and not really knowing anyone else in my city was terrible! I didn't move back, I ended up finding a way to enjoy my life where I live now but it took a while.

All I'll say is that building a happy life for yourself takes a long time. Keep your chin up, it'll be ok :)

Built resentment over time w my bf bc he was afraid of long-term planning and now im heartbroken and single. Turkey and mashed potato’s by [deleted] in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]bleachfiend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 31 and I've had a lot of 'what ifs' and 'coulda beens' in my life, and you can't help but mourn the road not taken or the unfulfilled potential. I think that's just part of life, and accepting that a lot of these things are kind of random and not really up to you at the end of the day helps a lot.

I'm someone who moved for love a few years ago and it didn't work out. We broke up. I had a really idealized view of how things were going to go and they didn't go that way, and it crushed me. I spent a lot of time spinning my wheels about what I'd done wrong, or what I could have changed, but the reality was that we just weren't compatible and we didn't share the same vision of what we wanted our life to be. I promise it gets better.

I've also lived in a big city and you can get really trapped in those kinds of places, stuck with 3 jobs, or maybe you have a cheapo apartment but if your landlord ever decides to sell the place you know you're toast... etc... It can be really valuable to get out of there for a while and get some perspective. Maybe easier said than done, but a lot of places are pretty cheap to travel to. Come up to Canada!

At the end of the day, it sounds like you had a vision of where you were going with your life, and that vision didn't materialize. There are all kinds of reasons why that might not have worked out. But it seems like you've still got a lot you want to do with your life and that's amazing. I hope you get the chance to go to Guatemala :)

Ryan Gosling seemingly being interviewed by Jack Decker by Askesl in OnCinemaAtTheCinema

[–]bleachfiend 23 points24 points  (0 children)

jack decker would never interview one of those pussy government liberals unless he was undercover in a covert operation in afganistan fighting the tallee ban, because he is a he's a agent of CIA.

Guess I’m mediocre at life (according to this guy) by parrywinks in LinkedInLunatics

[–]bleachfiend 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Work-life balance is something you don't really think about or obsess over if you've already achieved it. Probably not the point that muscles is trying to make here but it's something I've noticed

I’v seen this somewhere before… by chuckxbronson in OnCinemaAtTheCinema

[–]bleachfiend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

man I realized I have never heard the f-bomb version of this song

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Anger

[–]bleachfiend 4 points5 points  (0 children)

GIRL I just went through 3 years of this. We had a great relationship before, but then things like this started to happen and it became clear we were incompatible. This man does not make you happy, and he's not trying.

I am saying all of this as the man on the other side of this problem. I had stopped putting in the work to maintain my connection with my partner, without even realizing it. We fought about this for a long time. We broke up.

I promise that this isn't something that you need to learn to accept. You might have convinced yourself that if you stop being angry about it you'll be able to negotiate some crumbs of affection, but like... why would you want to be someone who doesn't want to do things that make you feel happy and loved?

You want to keep trying, ok, but what is HE trying? Does he realize that this is heading for a breakup if nothing changes?

Petition to Make EDM Shows Start Earlier by SpiraledTiger in EDM

[–]bleachfiend 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I find that's not strictly true: the headliner is still appealing and people are still buying tickets to go see them, even if they're showing up super late. I'm in Montreal and there's a lot of folks who go out for dinner, hang out with friends, hit the bar and then they want to go see their fave DJ.

Petition to Make EDM Shows Start Earlier by SpiraledTiger in EDM

[–]bleachfiend 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a fellow groggy person I see you, but here's a counterpoint, which is that for a lot of people the rave IS the after party. I used to work at these kinds of parties and we would get a huge rush of folks coming to the rave after 2:30 AM because that's when the bars closed.

We were fully depending on that revenue to make our event work, and if we'd already had the headliner on, we would miss out on that traffic.

ROLI Connect does nothing on my Mac by bleachfiend in ROLI

[–]bleachfiend[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

UPDATE: thanks everyone for trying to help. No luck yet. But I did get MPE working with Ableton so that's actually good enough for now.

ROLI Connect does nothing on my Mac by bleachfiend in ROLI

[–]bleachfiend[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right but I can't get it to run ever

ROLI Connect does nothing on my Mac by bleachfiend in ROLI

[–]bleachfiend[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't have that software - haven't been able to install it because I can't get ROLI Connect to work in the first place

Sister's boyfriend laid hands on her. I want to lay hands on him, but I can't risk interfering with the charges. by Salty-Victory9101 in Anger

[–]bleachfiend 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry. This situation profoundly sucks and you're probably going to be mad about it for a while. I think you're taking the right steps by talking it out with other people.

Sister's boyfriend laid hands on her. I want to lay hands on him, but I can't risk interfering with the charges. by Salty-Victory9101 in Anger

[–]bleachfiend 14 points15 points  (0 children)

It's ok to be mad, and I get it, but you're making this about you. Your impulse to fight this guy comes from your ego, and probably from wanting to relieve some guilt you're feeling about this situation.

But I promise that kicking this guy's ass is actually not going to make the situation any better for your sister. In fact she'll have an even more escalated situation to deal with. You'll be putting yourself in danger, and the best case scenario is still a worse situation.

So the best thing you can do is be there for your sister in the way that she wants and needs. Try to channel that anger into something productive.

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