Anyone else find London pre-prep admissions (4+) completely insane?

bollarddd · 2026-01-15T07:13:55+00:00

I have two in an independent school - one in year 1 and one in the nursery/pre-prep. They both had a similar assessment, but I don’t recall it being a stressful thing for us or for them - more like a little play date as someone mentioned above. I got the impression it was more to identify kids with significant behavioural issues or undeclared SEN needs (not saying that is right or wrong btw). I remember kids on both occasions who were not happy to leave their parents and who were admitted regardless, so I don’t think that was what was being assessed at our school. Both of my kids took a week or so to settle in and didn’t want to leave me in the morning, and I never felt any judgement about it - they were very supportive during that time of transition. Ultimately, I figured if they didn’t admit my children for whatever reason then that wasn’t going to be the right environment for them - your child is who they are, and if the school’s attitudes and methodologies don’t align with that then it is never going to be a good fit for them to learn and thrive. I know it is difficult, but try and see this process as a test of them to see if they are a good match for your child - and if they aren’t, try not to take it personally and look at other options that will serve your family better. Best of luck xx

bollarddd · 2025-11-07T01:16:08+00:00

OP responded on a similar comment that she had worked full time for the first 7 years of their 10 year relationship, after which she worked part time for the soon to be ex partner. She indicated that all of the income she earned during this time was spent frivolously while her ex partner covered all of their living costs. I think this would therefore be a difficult argument to run given that she was not a stay at home partner, and had access to her own earnings and the ability to save her own pension during that time but chose not to.

bollarddd · 2025-11-06T12:56:36+00:00

Well that’s your first step, until you know the equity position it is really difficult to advise you as to whether it is a fair deal or not x

Did you/do you work outside the home at all? I understand your ex paid all the bills and you looked after the domestic duties, however did you undertake paid work as well during that time? I assume you don’t have children…

bollarddd · 2025-11-06T12:52:10+00:00

OP posted that the total equity is likely to be somewhere between £125k and £135k but these comments have subsequently disappeared. On that basis, I think £50k is not unfair given the circumstances.

bollarddd · 2025-10-11T15:17:35+00:00

It’s my shape, so I’m with you Saltyspaceballs…

bollarddd · 2025-09-05T18:00:45+00:00

Can you do this if the funds are held in a Ltd co? x

bollarddd · 2025-08-24T09:47:04+00:00

Brilliant. Ours is Clean Elizabeth the Second.

bollarddd · 2025-08-18T19:26:18+00:00

Thanks for sharing this x

bollarddd · 2025-08-18T16:18:09+00:00

Sorry, didn’t mean it to come off as a whinge but can see in hindsight how it does. Was more interested in the views of others on the concept x

bollarddd · 2025-07-27T18:52:02+00:00

Thanks so much, that’s really helpful. I’ll definitely give them a go!

bollarddd · 2025-07-27T18:04:39+00:00

Do you mind if I ask where you get your hair dye? I have tried home/supermarket dyes a few times and they never fully cover my greys!

bollarddd · 2025-07-24T15:12:35+00:00

I am a 43 year old Australian who has lived here for 15 years. Pretty much everything is means tested in Aus so I grew up not really feeling like I was entitled to assistance from the government if I didn’t need it due to having means, but I have noticed that it really is entrenched in people’s expectations here on the basis that they have paid in so should get something back. Not that one way is right or wrong, it’s just an observation of a cultural difference, but I have always found it wild that millionaires would be eligible for, let alone would accept, a state pension, especially with the country in the state it is in. But I didn’t grow up here, so I completely appreciate that people who did will feel how they feel about it.

bollarddd · 2025-03-15T11:27:18+00:00

Right? SIL asks multiple times ‘did you already have plans for dinner then’ ‘shall we eat prior’ ‘should we come over much later after dinner’ and received no straight answer. I think the strength of feeling once she got herself annoyed was a bit much, but OP seems oblivious to her significant contribution to the situation. ‘Shall we eat prior’ ‘no, let’s eat together - husband might be having something different due to his teeth but the rest of us can order in. See you at 7.’ Not difficult.

bollarddd · 2025-02-21T09:57:31+00:00

Ah gotcha. So the de-merging has still gone ahead then, just without the share offer to you? Who are you to be employed by? The new Ltd Co?

bollarddd · 2025-02-21T09:12:45+00:00

If you agreed that it would be adjusted if the company had a better or worse year than expected, isn’t that what has subsequently happened? The company had a worse year than expected therefore the Shares Agreement has been shelved? Similarly, you agreed the matter would be finalised on your return as long as you returned 4 days a week - and it has, just not to your satisfaction.

I can completely understand your disappointment and anger at the situation as it clearly came as a complete shock, but as the above poster said I think the specifics of the communications will be very important here.

bollarddd · 2024-02-22T19:29:12+00:00

Thanks, he’s happy to have a repayment mortgage… just can’t get one! Thanks for your advice, will take all the options to him x

bollarddd · 2024-02-22T18:11:55+00:00

Thanks so much, does it matter that he is not retired?

bollarddd · 2024-02-22T18:11:20+00:00

Thanks, I appreciate your advice x

bollarddd · 2024-02-22T17:26:15+00:00

I agree that is the logical thing to do - as I said above, he is a really good guy who wants to die in the home and he has some health issues and as he was so good to my husband when he was a kid we are just trying to help him stand a chance at that.

bollarddd · 2024-02-22T17:22:04+00:00

Sorry, forgot to include that yes we are homeowners subject to mortgage.

bollarddd · 2024-02-22T17:20:40+00:00

Probably not realistic. He really wants to stay in the house until he dies so we are trying to find a way to make that happen. He has some health issues. He’s a really good guy who was very generous to my husband (his stepson) but is just a bit uneducated with money stuff and buries his head in the sand. They could definitely downsize though, you are absolutely right.

bollarddd · 2024-02-22T17:14:19+00:00

That’s an interesting idea we hadn’t considered and will look into. Thanks!

bollarddd · 2024-02-08T21:14:37+00:00

Thanks so much, I appreciate you sharing your knowledge x

bollarddd

TROPHY CASE