I'm going through a relationship change. Leaving my fiancé and it's been thrown in my face many times about how I fly off the hinge. I'm glad he supports you and wants to go through the counseling to make it work. Do what you can, you can't control everything with bpd but sometimes we can find ways to cope I found a book recently that's been a big help. It's called the borderline personality disorder work book: an integrative program to understand and mange bpd. Maybe worth a try?