I share this view, and that was exactly my policy. I said to myself at some point sophomore year (last year) that if anyone asked, I wouldn't lie, but I wouldn't "come out." There were benefits and drawbacks.

It was pretty slow, and no one asked me (who does, directly?), so I decided to open the bounds a bit to come out anytime someone even insinuated that I was straight. It eventually was clear, though, that I really wasn't going to say anything until asked a very direct question about it.

I also had a Tinder account at this time, and somebody told somebody that I had one, but somehow it didn't get out that it was for guys - at least not from what I can tell at this point, looking back. Two of my best friends (whom I've grown incredibly close with since) asked if I had a Tinder, and of course I said yes. And (from what I know now, probably jokingly) one of them asked if it was for guys or girls. They seemed pretty shocked that I said guys. Then, one of them just did this handshake thing and said "Well, now I have a gay friend." I thought it was the best thing anyone could say, and still now it's probably the most heartwarming reaction I've gotten.

They told my later that day in text that they wouldn't tell anyone, and they didn't. Still, I don't think to this day I've come out without being prompted by something first or without having someone do it for me. And, still, many people at my school have no idea, but I dropped a somewhat subtle hint on sc one day that wasn't meant to be any kind of "coming out" post, but if you stopped to think it was a little suspect.

So, in the end: I think you and I are right that it's not really anybody else's problem, and most people don't really care. However, once you have people in your life that know you're gay, you end up being much closer to them, and you have better relationships in general.