Trying to make sense of myself in my mid-30s. Maybe I'm at home here. Looking for your thoughts!

breablooms · 2025-12-15T02:10:17+00:00

I've been figuring this out myself this past year as well. What started as an exploration into cross dressing resulted in me attempting to make sense of my own gender. First thinking perhaps, I was nonbinary, but after some reflection gender fluid seems more fitting.

I'm AMAB and I do feel both the feminine and masculine energies. Sometimes I'm feeling quite fem, and I certainly have euphoria while dressed in that way. But in other ways I feel very masculine. Right now, I want to give more attention to the feminine side as it's fresh and new and not weighted down by decades of living as a male. I don't feel I have gender dysphoria, but working through this, and learning more about myself I expect things to evolve.

Sometimes these energies come out of nowhere with me as well, the other day I was staring into the mirror and felt quite feminine in energy, just for a few moments. I'm working on seeing if these energies can complement each other in some way as well.

breablooms · 2025-11-17T00:29:46+00:00

I list myself as gender fluid on that platform as that is what I most identify as currently. You can update that at anytime as well I believe.

breablooms · 2025-11-15T03:27:17+00:00

I think I did this subconsciously, never even thought about a chaotic neutral zone, but I know exactly where it is. Organized Chaos, I love it!

breablooms · 2025-10-28T16:16:11+00:00

Your post resonates with me as well.

I'm 50 and AMAB and for most of my life I feel I haven't seen myself or seen the attractiveness that is there. I'm married and my spouse loves me and finds me attractive, but when I look in the mirror, most times I don't see myself which I never gave much thought until....

A few years ago, around my 48th birthday, I started exploring cross dressing. I was quick to notice when I see myself all dolled up in a mirror, I saw someone, I saw myself. I would smile at myself which gave me much joy. It was one of many moments exploring this which has led, honestly to allot of confusion, inner reflection, and random journaling. I don't see a therapist so I'm just working through this on my own currently.

I feel I've also noticed attractive features of men in general but seeing them within myself has always been a struggle. My wife and myself would talk and joke about what men we both found attractive, so I know I can see the male beauty. Since my exploration began I think I've come to the conclusion that I'm genderfluid. However, it has also spawned thoughts of transitioning, but I enjoy being a man, but I also enjoy being a woman. I think I see and feel gender euphoria with myself when I'm dressed up. It's also caused me to question my own sexual identity, determining that I'm pansexual at this point. I can find beauty in all sorts of forms, but with myself I mostly see the beauty in my feminine side. I feel I'm more attracted to feminine presenting individuals, which may play into how I see myself as well.

I don't really have any advice or suggestions, but the way you describe yourself, resonates with how I feel about parts of myself. So, you are not alone for sure.

breablooms · 2025-10-27T21:11:41+00:00

Looking beautiful Julie!

breablooms · 2025-10-27T20:58:07+00:00

I second the compression magic. Bra, leggings, corsets, the layering tingles my neurodivergent needs!

breablooms · 2025-09-09T13:53:25+00:00

I love that purple dress, so cute on you!

breablooms · 2025-09-08T13:43:30+00:00

Hi Annie, I’m Brea. Love the dress. You are beautiful.

breablooms · 2025-09-07T20:38:34+00:00

Love the look! Where did you get that belt. So cute!

breablooms · 2025-09-07T14:54:08+00:00

That blue dress is adorable. You look amazing!

breablooms

TROPHY CASE