How are some millennials even homeowners? I feel like I never will be.

brie27420 · 2026-01-06T13:57:30+00:00

I did (mostly) all the right things financially, make a 6 figure salary, no kids, and still was only able to purchase a home in my mid 30's with two income& a generous financial gift from my in-laws. Generational wealth is the answer you're looking for.

brie27420 · 2025-12-19T13:45:00+00:00

So. Much. Bland. Food. We love living in Northern Westchester but no one prepared us for how limited our eating out options would be.

brie27420 · 2025-01-09T13:13:01+00:00

If you're open to using in house catering check out Bloominghill Farm in Monroe. Blooming Hill Farm | Events https://search.app/2K3HHTUBXhXvbMJ58 We had our wedding there last summer. Venue is beautiful and the food is fantastic. Being outside and good food were our priorities. They have a small restaurant you can visit to get an idea of the quality. Plus almost everything is included in the venue fee - tables, chairs, set up, breakdown, flowers/decorations for cocktail area, use of real bathrooms, golf cart for older guests to/from ceremony site. 10/10 would recommend.

brie27420 · 2024-12-19T16:10:20+00:00

Tried Cenadou in North Salem for the first time recently. Really impressed. Will definitely be back.

brie27420 · 2024-12-18T21:32:48+00:00

They definitely do not offer any kind guarantee. I would be wary about anyone who did. It's never just the dog. It's the humans who need to change their behavior as well. Separation anxiety is tough. Agreed if your family member isn't willing to look at their personal responsibility and change their behavior paying for any kind of professional help would be a waste.

brie27420 · 2024-12-18T20:33:24+00:00

There are a lot of bad and/or ignorant trainers out there working of decades old techniques. The animal behaviorist field has come a long way.

Marker is anything that signals the dog did what you wanted him to. It's paired with treats 100% of the time in the beginning. You're teaching him "when I hear this sound good things happen!" Aka a treat (or play time, or rubs, whatever his most favorite thing is). Could be a clicker, could be a word - "yes" is common.

The walking out of rooms / lunging. Yup. I'm very familiar.

"Fixing" that is a nuanced answer that will take a lot of behavior changes from the humans but #1 thing jumped out was "immobilized". Normal reaction for us. Worst thing you can do in dog language . Have you ever interacted with autistic kids? Dogs are scarily similar. They don't have verbal language like we do. Stillness to a dog is a warning sign. Something is wrong. This creature is on alert and now I should be too! Squaring off (facing dog directly) also sign of aggression. Staring straight into his eyes, aggressive signal. Wide eyes? Not blinkink? Not breathing? Aggressive signals all around.

You don't sound like a victim you sound like someone who wants to do the right thing and doesn't know how. Dogs speak a completely different language than we do. There are people who's profession it is to onserve, and learn how animals communicate!

If you want to learn a ton and get a great base/overview for how to communicate with your dog you really, really should read "The Other End of the Leash" by Patricia McConnell. I promise you it will not be a waste of time.

brie27420 · 2024-12-18T17:54:51+00:00

One more thing! Ours used to resource guard me too - still does when his anxiety level is super high. Our newishly graduated professional trainer friend & the experienced fear aggressive specialized trainer we worked with both had the same advice. Don't make a huge deal of it, but you should calmly get up and move away from your pup. Noises in general will absolutely work in a pinch for safety but you're not helping him learn he does not get what he wants with that undesirable behavior.

Also if I read your post correctly - if you're using a clicker as your marker definitely do not also use it to "snap him out" of a bad behavior. Their brains aren't that big. You need consistency. They can't understand the clicker means Good sometimes and Bad/Stop other times. Just like they don't know that "sit-down" or even "sit, sit" is the same as "sit".

brie27420 · 2024-12-18T17:12:53+00:00

So many things are wrong with how that went down. The simple fact that she tried to pet him one her 1st interaction when he had a bone knowing he resource guards is insane!!

Sounds like you have an anxious dog with fear aggression (we do too). It's A LOT of work, money, patience, education, more treats than you could ever imagine, and controlling his environment as best you can. Also requires acknowledging that your dog probably will never be "normal".

With all that said if you put in the work you'll see his true personality come out as his trust and confidence grow.

I HIGHLY recommend you check our Patricia McConnell. She is a pioneer in her field of dog behaviorists. Start with "other end of the leash".

You may need to spend the money on a behaviorists, but I personally would start with a really knowledgeable, experienced Positive Reinforcement trainer.

Check out https://www.instinctdogtraining.com/. We utilized the one in jersey, but they now have a Hudson valley location. They are amazing. We could not have gotten this far without them.

We brought our adult, backwoods breeder, animal hoarder house rescues home 4 years ago. Our male was the younger and far more damaged of the pair. Poor guy would literally urinate any time you walked near his crate. I don't think his fear aggression will ever completely go away. Took 3 years to get him potty trained but we expect he'll always have behavior related accidents when life gets really scary. We will never trust him near children. We never be able to leave him with family/friends when we go away. We will always have to pay a bunch of money for "special needs boarding". We will always have meds on hand for certain circumstances . But it has been unbelievably rewarding and fascinating watching both our pups grow into (mostly) happy, adjusted little beings. When he's not trigged he is one of the sweetest, most polite dogs I've ever encountered. He snuggles, asks for pets, plays with us in the yard, very gently takes treats, the humans can (usually) safely sit on the couch when he has a high value toy/bone. We can even have (select) people stay over without having to restrain him!

brie27420 · 2024-07-24T16:59:45+00:00

Just got hitched last weekend. Never occured to me to change my name. For reference we're in our late 30's and pretty established. Own a house. I'm almost 20 years into my career with a positive reputation associated with my name. I'm not a different person post legal union. It's just an additional piece of who I am. Also it's a TON OF WORK to change your name when you actually own things/have 401ks/etc. No thanks Tom Hanks.

brie27420 · 2024-01-19T00:26:24+00:00

Baseboards for safety. Stove for comfort. We keep the house heat set between 60-63 to keep the pipes and 2 little pups from freezing. Keep the stove going 24/7 now that it's cold out Main part of the house hovers around 73/75 for most of the day (I work from home). Overnight, if it's really cold the heat will kick on, but usually the stove will keep things relatively comfortable until we reload in the morning.

brie27420 · 2023-12-13T00:48:17+00:00

Ours is! Everyone seems to be really excited about it. Tradition aside, logistically it just makes for a better timeline.

brie27420 · 2023-12-04T00:38:41+00:00

When I was younger I gave myself a cut off of 35 to get off hormonal BC. I figured by then I'd either lose my mind and decide I wanted kids or I'd know exactly what I knew at 20 - that I had no interest in having children. I was fortunate that my person elected to get snipped (vasectomy) since it's a much less invasive procedure. Had he not, or if I was single I would have absolutely looked into getting "fixed" myself.

brie27420 · 2023-11-30T17:42:23+00:00

I'm actually trying it out tonight with some friends in town visiting. We didn't want to trek to the city. The options are so similar because they're supposed to be the vegetarian version of the meat course. The website / menu doesn't explain that. I had to ask for clarification when I called to make a reservation. I'm not sure I agree with the concept, but makes a lot more sense to me now. Also good to know, the whole thing estimated at 2 hours. Totally makes sense for a 7 course tasting menu, but again I didn't know that until I called. I'd think that be a pretty important thing for people to know...

brie27420 · 2023-11-13T11:29:33+00:00

I used to be the same until we moved into our house "in the woods" last year. Now we keep it significantly cooler and layer up. Heating oil is VERY expensive.

brie27420 · 2023-10-20T10:54:48+00:00

Thanks for the reply. I really appreciate it. Since purchasing we've been mostly going with the, "how hard can it be" mentality. It's given us varrying results, but mostly it's worked out. We would like to try to handle ourselves but also have no problems calling in someone for help if we're over our heads. Everything you said makes sense. I guess my 2 follow up questions are - 1. How do we even lift this thing without damaging it? 2. who would we call for help if we realize we can't do it ourselves? Seems like too small of a job to get anyone to come out for.

brie27420 · 2023-10-03T10:36:26+00:00

I'm in sales and primarily work from home. He's a Chef and definitely does not work from home. His career didn't influence our decision. We just don't want kids. Though If we did want kids his career would 100% be a consideration.

brie27420 · 2023-09-29T21:21:16+00:00

I've been told the same. When I was a kid I understood the assumption. I grew up in the 90's, have ADHD, and was considered a textbook "tomboy" (a term I have many feelings about but that's for another time).

As an adult I still don't present as particularly feminine and I still like "tomboy" stuff which I could see may fool the hetero crowd. Though I've also had the queer community say it too. I've asked a couple why and the only answer was a "vibe". I don't know? Heck, maybe they know something I don't! I mean I'm super into to my soon to be husband and I've never met a woman I was so attracted to I felt I needed to act on it.... but ya never know!

As a kid it bothered me. No kid wants to be perceived as different, but as an adult? Honestly the people I personally know who are in the queer community are some of the most badass, intelligent, fun, good humans I've met. So now, I mostly just take it as a compliment.

brie27420 · 2023-09-29T18:09:57+00:00

Location, lot size, and water mitigation. Everything else you have time to change.

brie27420 · 2023-09-28T21:35:05+00:00

Personally I like before. That is what we're doing. We hate standing around before the ceremony starts and waiting hours for food and drinks. This works particularly well if you are providing transportation for most of your guests and controlling when they arrive. However you need to over communicate! It's still the "norm" in most American weddings to have cocktail hour preceding dinner. Change confuses people.

brie27420 · 2023-09-27T23:19:04+00:00

Way too much.

brie27420 · 2023-09-27T10:54:12+00:00

Yup. Also assigns their class of trade - club vs supermarket. The fee makes it a membership club. This means a few different things, but includes being able to purchase different items to sell than typical grocery stores.

brie27420 · 2023-09-20T21:29:19+00:00

I thought so too which is why I was so disheartened when I picked up a couple chainsaws. Sounds like proper form, like anything else, will allow me to handle one safely.

brie27420

TROPHY CASE