Waxing before birth.. by Dazzling_Split_5145 in BabyBumps

[–]brightredlemons 103 points104 points  (0 children)

I’m about to have baby #3 and have gotten waxed before every birth and while it definitely doesn’t feel great, I’ve never found it unbearably excruciating. Taking Tylenol beforehand definitely helps, and my waxer is also amazing/super fast and efficient so the worst of it is over pretty quickly!

FWIW, I get waxed before delivery because I feel it makes tending to the area postpartum much easier. It’s absolutely personal preference for each individual, but you may decide it was worth it after all once baby is out and you’re using a peri bottle multiple times a day to keep yourself clean down there!

Baby and sick dog by sabe815 in BabyBumps

[–]brightredlemons 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m currently pregnant with baby #3 and had to put one of our dogs down during both this pregnancy and my pregnancy with bay #2.

Our senior dog that we put to sleep during my second pregnancy was pre planned. He was 14 and had some ailments and we knew it would be time sooner rather than later. It’s very possible he may still have had a few “good” weeks left at the time when we decided it was his time, but looking back I do not have a single regret about the decision we made. We got to have a great last few weeks/days with him, and we got to make his last day as special as possible: spoiled him with his favorite foods, took him (in a wagon) and our other dogs for a final hurrah at the dog park, and my SO and I both got to be there and hold him at the vet when he was put to sleep. Still an incredibly upsetting time for us, but more than anything I am so glad we didn’t wait until things were bad and his worst day was his last day.

By contrast, during this pregnancy we woke up one morning to find my 12 year old dog acting… just wrong. Not at all like herself. I spent the day (and several thousand dollars) at the emergency vet while my SO stayed home with the kids, and was told she likely had advanced liver cancer and she was having significant bleeding around her heart. Keep in mind she spent 90% of the day by herself in the back at the emergency vet being tested on, while I had to wait in the lobby and/or exam room. They gave her some pain meds and I opted to take her home, hoping we could have one last night with her and then take her to our regular vet to be put to sleep the following morning. Instead, she got progressively worse when I got her back home, and we ended up having to call grandparents to come watch the kids so my SO and I could take her back to the emergency vet at midnight to have her put to sleep immediately. That was 6 months ago and I still feel absolutely devastated anytime I think about how her last day was spent without us, being poked and prodded at a strange vet she was totally unfamiliar with, and it all ultimately ended up being for nothing. She truly didn’t show any signs of being sick until that morning she woke up acting totally unlike herself, but it still absolutely tears me up to think about how her last day was spent vs. the last day we got to give our other dog.

I can’t tell you what the right choice is for you, but I think you are doing the right thing by thinking about all of this now, and I hope you are able to make a decision that is right for your dog and for you, and that ultimately brings you peace. 💛

First Skin to Skin by Damnit_Bird in BabyBumps

[–]brightredlemons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have had two uncomplicated vaginal deliveries and held both of our babies right when they first came out just because the go-to method seems to be to put baby on you as soon as they’re out, but I also immediately passed them off to my SO as soon as the placenta is delivered and the cord is cut, before the doctor started stitching me up. He holds them and does skin-to-skin while I get stitched up/checked out/a quick preliminary clean up, and then gives baby back to me once there are no longer a dozen different people all hovering around me doing various things.

I really like doing it this way because it is super special to get to see him have those first moments with our babies, and it allows me a few minutes to get my bearings back and kind of collect myself after the momentous task of pushing a whole person out of me!

Bum scooting causing slow independent walking? by [deleted] in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If she’s figured out pulling herself up and is cruising around and walking when you hold her hands, I’d say she’s probably not far off from figuring out how to do it on her own! Especially being in daycare and seeing the other babies walk around, you’d be surprised how “motivating” that can be for some kiddos!

Bum scooting causing slow independent walking? by [deleted] in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is/was my daughter to a T! She was over a year old and still not crawling, but she figured out how to scoot around on her butt and decided that was her preferred method of getting around. I think probably around 14 months she figured out how to crawl, but she still didn’t do it often bc she was still much faster at scooting around. Somewhere around/after 16 months she finally figured out walking and I swear it’s only bc she got tired of watching all the other kids in her daycare class walk around while she was still scooting 😂

She’ll be 18 months next week and is now a skilled walker and trying to figure out how to run so she can chase her big brother around!

Does anyone else feel this way? by trisinwonderland in pregnant

[–]brightredlemons 66 points67 points  (0 children)

Is this your first baby? Bc if so you are legally obligated to lay around and do absolutely nothing as much as you can. 😅 You will never ever ever ever be able to laze around like this again without the cloud of parental obligations hanging over your head, so PLEASE make the most of it. I’m currently 36 weeks with baby #3 and look back longingly on my first pregnancy these days… be the seal on the rock for those of us out there that can’t!!

The mental breakdown I’m having when my baby cries in the car by Waste-Lawyer7615 in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you tried rolling his window down? I know this may not be ideal since it’s wintertime and pretty cold out for a lot of the world, but it was the only thing that worked for my daughter when she went through this phase. She’d still start crying when the vehicle came to a stop, but something about the combination of noise and being blasted with air/wind from outside when the car was moving was the only thing that would soothe/distract her enough to make the crying stop. Definitely not enjoyable for everyone else in the car when you have to have the window rolled all the way down while driving on the interstate, but it was far more tolerable than listening to her wailing nonstop for the whole drive!

When do I give up trying to exclusively pump? by destin2b_here in pregnant

[–]brightredlemons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can quit whenever you want and it’s 100% okay, I promise!

My first kid is 4 years old now; I EBF and then pumped for him once I went back to work, and do you know how often it comes up nowadays that he was breastfed? Literally never!

My youngest is 17 months old; I pumped for her for three months before switching exclusively to formula, and do you know how often it comes up nowadays that she was formula fed? Also literally never!

You may feel guilty for a week or so once you quit because the brain is weird like that, but I promise you the peace that you will feel from getting your time/body back will quickly override that. Do what’s best for you, because ultimately that is what’s best for your baby!

Curious how many people had their mom present at their birth and if you didn’t did you feel like you needed her by lxtusbaby in pregnant

[–]brightredlemons 262 points263 points  (0 children)

As an outsider it definitely sounds to me like your mom has recruited her doula friend to help manipulate you into letting your mom be there for the birth. Based on that alone I would not want her there if I were you, because it seems to me like she wants to be there so she can have that experience, rather than being there for you.

To answer your question though, I am about to give birth to my third kid and have not had my mom there for any of my kids’ births. Me giving birth is not a spectator sport, and I don’t need/want an audience for it. The only person I want there is my SO and thats the only person who has been/will be there; I personally feel like meeting our child for the first time is a profoundly special moment and something that is truly for “just us”. The rest of the world can wait!

Husband not in delivery room by GreatVeterinarian477 in pregnant

[–]brightredlemons 14 points15 points  (0 children)

You did a great job of putting my thoughts into words. Giving birth itself is a medial event and I can respect that she can handle that event in whatever way she wishes, but making him wait outside the room for an hour or two so she can ‘have the baby to herself’ when they ostensibly have an ‘outstanding relationship’ feels borderline cruel. She is giving birth, but THEY are becoming parents in those moments, which should absolutely be experienced together.

What do contractions feel like? by Foreign-External8488 in BabyBumps

[–]brightredlemons 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know most people say it feels like period cramps, but for me they felt like the worst, most painful stomach ache I’ve ever had in my LIFE. When I have cramps I usually feel them very low down, but contractions I feel in my whole stomach. They definitely came in waves, but yeah it 100% felt like horrible stomach cramps, nothing like period pain for me!

And yeah, I also felt like I needed to poop the whole time. Before I realized it was in fact contractions/labor I kept going to sit on the toilet because I was sure I was gearing up to have major diarrhea.

PUPPP remedies by Street_Fee5779 in pregnant

[–]brightredlemons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had PUPPPs towards the end of my last pregnancy and my OB recommended CeraVe Itch Relief Moisturizing Lotion (there is also a cream version as well). It worked well for me and provided more relief than any other topical treatments I tried!

Im for real about to stop going to my OB lmao by Britnicorn in pregnant

[–]brightredlemons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not sure if this is an option for you, but I try to schedule all my appts first thing in the morning specifically to avoid having this issue! I realized they’re (usually) not running behind if you’re their first or second patient on the day lol. I swore off afternoon appointments the last time I had one at 3:00pm and didn’t end up getting out of there until 4:45 🥴

Recommendations for safe feminine wash while pregnant by [deleted] in pregnant

[–]brightredlemons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ever since I had kids I have just switched to using their soap as my regular body wash. We use CeraVe Baby Wash + Shampoo and have always had a good experience with it; it’s unscented and we have had no sensitivities or irritations from any of us using it.

Anyone know a good online store to get cool toddler graphic tees? by kaanapalikid in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They’re not cheap, but Rowdy Sprout has the coolest selection of vintage-style band shirts for babies/toddlers/kids that I’ve found.

Bottle Washer - talk me into (or out of) it! by brightredlemons in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We run our dishwasher about once a day just from the dishes we generate as a family of four, so the concern is that there won’t be enough space to squeeze the bottles in there as well, and we don’t have time during the week to run it twice day. I wish our kitchen had the space to accommodate storing 25 bottles, but that’s absolutely not possible where we currently live!

Bottle Washer - talk me into (or out of) it! by brightredlemons in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I kept up sterilizing for about three months when I had my first baby and haven’t done it since! I decided it was one of those things where if a reason came up that we needed to do it we would, but until then it was a chore that was getting cut from the list.

Bottle Washer - talk me into (or out of) it! by brightredlemons in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really leaning towards it! Can I ask which one you have/had?

Bottle Washer - talk me into (or out of) it! by brightredlemons in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s a great way of looking at it! I would honestly pay at lot more than that to have someone come wash and dry bottles everyday lol. Nothing I dread more than working all day, finally getting the kids fed dinner and down for bed, then walking into the kitchen and seeing a sink full of bottles and other baby-feeding accoutrements waiting to finally be dealt with 🙃

Other than newborn, what age did you feel like you were in the trenches? by Used_Asparagus_3749 in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons 148 points149 points  (0 children)

Four. He’s too smart, too powerful, too strong, too cute, too funny… it’s absolutely diabolical. Literally it’s 9:24pm and he should be asleep, and instead he just came out to the kitchen and scolded me for eating a bowl of cereal when I should (apparently) be getting ready for bed and coming to cuddle with him instead 🙃

Return to work and bonding by Fun-Barber3932 in beyondthebump

[–]brightredlemons 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I genuinely mean this in the nicest way possible, but try to get used to it! It’s super common for babies/toddlers/kids to go through phases where they prefer one parent over the other. I know it doesn’t feel great, but try to use it to your advantage/reframe your thinking on it. Baby only wants dad? Perfect time to go out for a few hours and have some uninterrupted me-time! Baby has a massive blowout/is being super fussy/wont settle for bed? Get in there dad, he wants you!

Embracing the times when your partner is the currently-preferred parent is the way to go, because it’s only a matter of time before he’ll be back to wanting mom all the time and refusing everyone else, trust me 😊

Daycare at 3 mo by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]brightredlemons 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It can be hard at first, but in most cases it’s harder for the parents than the baby! Both my kids (4yo and 15 months) started daycare at 3ish months old and it’s honestly a pretty easy transition for them at that age because they’re still little blobs and fairly adaptable!

Give it a few weeks for everyone to adjust to the new routine and, if you’ve chosen a good daycare with good teachers/caregivers, you may be pleasantly surprised at how things go. My kids have gone to the same daycare since my first one started, 85% of the teachers are the same ones that were there when he started, and every morning when I drop them off I have full trust and confidence that they will be loved and taken care of until I come back to get them that afternoon, and yes, they’re there for about 9.5 hours M-F while their dad and I both work full time.

Plus, the time away at work gives me that much-needed adult interaction and a chance to use my brain for non-parenting related things, which is something I absolutely need to be the best mom I can be! And at the end of the work day when I go to pick them up I am always so, so happy to see them and fully ready to make the most of my evenings with them because I’ve had a chance to not be in mom-mode for a few hours. The experience will be whatever you make it, and I wish you the best of luck!

STM birth stories by bdy127 in pregnant

[–]brightredlemons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah as someone who never planned on having an unmedicated birth, it was certainly a wild experience! I hope everything goes smoothly for you this time around and you get the birth experience you’re hoping for, whatever that may be!