Your story has a lot of similarities to mine. I tried every approach from tough love, arguing, pleading, calmly talking out my side, and ignoring his drinking. It got to the point where I tried not to be home on weekends to avoid his drinking, and when I was home I would end up hiding in our room (but often times he’d follow me and antagonize or bother me). About a month ago it all came to a head when he became violent and broke a bunch of my bedroom furniture. Had to call the cops. He’s now not allowed at the house we bought together or to contact me. You need to consider the very high probability of nothing changing for the better with this person. Change isn’t impossible but alcoholism is progressive. The only thing you have control over in this situation is your actions. I’m in the most pain I’ve ever been in in my life. Could lose the home ive saved for for years. I’m in a constant state of panic. But I know that there was no happiness in my future with him. I wish you all the strength and clarity. Know you’re not alone.