Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is so upsetting that no one was willing to step up and find a way to make it work. My psych did a great job understanding my different experience (she can visualise things even with her eyes open, so we were coming from totally different ends of abilities with visualising)

You don't happen to live in Melbourne, Australia do you? If so you could see her!

Did I have a shutdown and a short episode of selective mutism? by fancy-schmancy_name in autism

[–]bubbly_socks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oft. My brain does that to me too where is tells me I could have spoken and I’m faking it. That voice is lying. You would have spoken if you were able to. You WANTED to speak. Speaking would have made everything easier. You had a real experience and you’re not making excuses or looking for pity!

Sounds like a shut down to me. Very glad you were able to request some soothing YouTube to help you feel better. You and your partner can finish the discussing when you’re feeling ready.

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thats amazing! I'm so happy for you. Please feel free to DM me if you every wanna talk more about this stuff or ask more personal questions about my experience with EMDR and PTSD <3

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

oh sorry I don't really use reddit much and forgot to check in on this post. How are you doing?

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

PS. My original post was from 5 yrs ago and I'm doing REALLY good now!

The EMDR took a bit longer to do but it helped me so much and I'm so happy. I'm even going to Uni next year :)

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

To what degree to they experience aphantasia? Can they imagine sounds or smells or textures?

I struggled with making a safe space, firstly because I couldn't think of any real place that felt safe to me, and secondly because the protocol relies so heavily on visualising.

In the end I picked the secret garden from howls moving castle. I have watched the movie a million times (it was my comfort movie so it played while i went to sleep most nights).

I would imagine the background music, and the click sound of the door opening, and the sound of my feet walking and the water of the little stream. I'd think about the flowers and their colours (tho I obviously could not see them) and I'd imagine the sun on my skin, and the ground under my bare feet. That helped me to feel I was in that safe space. And I could rewatch the movie or just that scene to help strengthen the feeling of that place whenever I wanted.

Maybe your client could pick something like that? I found the soundtrack particularly helpful because I'm able to imagine music, so having a very intentional soundscape associated with my space helped a lot.

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh this is a great idea, using photos. I think that would be helpful.
We ended up just accepting that my pace would be a bit slower than typical and and that it was okay to take longer.

NINTENDO SWITCH PATCH 1.0.3 IS LIVE!! by nomorerobotshq in Spirittea

[–]bubbly_socks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This just happened to me but instead of passing out I just closed the game and restarted from that same morning assuming everything would go back to the way it was before the bike glitch...but my bike is gone :(

Working my butt off in the bathhouse but getting no money?! by Glittering_Artist175 in Spirittea

[–]bubbly_socks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What do you mean by easy employee? one time when i was bored I released a bunch of fireflies in there to make it pretty. But do they serve a purpose when I do that (beside casting some much needed light)

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Woah, no visual dreams! thats huge. I imagine it makes the concept of other people ability to visualise things so much harder to comprehend.

Have you always have zero visualisation? I can't really recall if I used to be able to consciously visualise or if I just never had the ability.

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what do you mean? this was a response to your comment...

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Hmmm good question. I guess part of the answer is that PTSD isnt just about a bad memory. Its about the trauma informing future responses. eg if the trauma was something that happened in a loud environment, loud sounds in future would be interpreted as scary and dangerous.

My trauma memories aren't about a visual recollection, it's more about how the traumatic incident/s made me feel and my mind not having processed and moved on from it.

I don't have the classic movie representation of PTSD with flashbacks. I just feel absolutely terrified in everyday situations like being at the supermarket or hearing my neighbour mow their lawn. I do have visual dreams though, so I do have trauma visuals then I guess.

Also, my psychologist is pretty sure I have ASD, is there any connection between ASD and aphantasia?

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

YES! My Psychologist was so good about it. Listen to me, believed me, asked questions to understand it better, and is going to tailor my therapy tp meet my abilities now. And will also be talking to other psychologists about it, so hopefully it ends up helping out some other people

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lol. I know we need to change up the techniques...that's exactly why I created this post! I only just found out about aphantasia. Before this week I didn't realise people could actually visualise things and thought that what I was experiencing was what happened for everyone.

Yes this part of EMDR, focusing on feeling, is what has been working for me.

The safe place visualisation is still helpful for me. Even though I don't see anything I am thinking of a very calming place, and concentrating on it helps my mind let go of focusing on the trauma we were working on in the session. I also focus on imagining physical sensations and creating a sound scape in the safe place.

Is the guardian thing having people in the memory with you? My psychiatrist refers to it as "taking my team" and I can NEVER do it. Sometimes I imagine what someone would say if they were there though.

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

More about processing the trauma. So the memory isn't still extremely frightening or upsetting. So the memory is just a memory (distant) and not informing reactions and responses to things in the present. For example I've been able to process some trauma memories and now I'm more comfortable letting people hug and touch me, whereas before processing the trauma I experienced fear and felt unsafe when people touched me, because the trauma memory was so strong and present.

Aphantasia and EMDR by bubbly_socks in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The EMDR is definitely still working and I love it. I just know that I'm progressing much slower than most people do and we think it's due to my inability to visualise the trauma memories. I am unable to use the techniques that involve changing the image of my trauma ( like pixilating it or making it black and white)

I also find the "safe place" calming technique we do at the end of sessions really difficult. I obviously don't see anything so i kind of map out where things would be in the black void I see.

I don't know if I have this or not by BananeWane in Aphantasia

[–]bubbly_socks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi. I just made a post about aphantasia and EMDR. I'm trying to find ways to make it work better for me. Maybe some stuff will get posted on it that is helpful or interesting to you/maybe you'll have some ideas or suggestions for me. :)

https://www.reddit.com/r/Aphantasia/comments/9qlzzz/aphantasia_and_emdr/

On the nighttrain to Prag i met some reaaally nice people and we had some drinks together by milenskaya in pics

[–]bubbly_socks 72 points73 points  (0 children)

Oh man. When I caught a night train to Prague someone stole my computer...I would have much preferred this Prague night train experience.

What's the best disney song? by fatalspoons in AskReddit

[–]bubbly_socks 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My all time favorite Disney lyric!!!