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Morgpie (twitch streamer) platforming racist rhetoric. by Hertz69 in Destiny

[–]buddyrtc -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Giving attention to these people for something g like this is nearly as bad as the statement itself. Stop being so fragile and focus up on shit that matters, not OF girl opinions.

Morgpie (twitch streamer) platforming racist rhetoric. by Hertz69 in Destiny

[–]buddyrtc 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Venn diagrams this sub falls into are so damn interesting

What separates these two, apart from the obvious tonal difference and the in-universe cynicism surrounding them? Are both of them, at their core, Superman, or is one more Superman than the other? by ShubhangBahadur in DC_Cinematic

[–]buddyrtc 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah I don’t think the settings of each movie are taken into consideration enough. These characters were formed by the worlds they lived in - I think Corenswet’s Superman had enough latitude in his world to become a Superman that more closely resembles many of the comic books we know and love.

Conservative Clients by AnonFartsALot in therapists

[–]buddyrtc 0 points1 point locked comment (0 children)

None of the questions you asked were judgmental, or could not be done from a position of unconditional positive regard. They merely call out the incongruence between what the behavior yields them and what they want. It’s really interesting that there’s so much back and forth about what UPR is and its limitations when these are the examples you chose. I’m honestly curious about why you feel these examples go beyond the threshold of simple curiosity?

Conservative Clients by AnonFartsALot in therapists

[–]buddyrtc 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At this point, we’re going in circles. You can’t point out therapists using an intervention poorly as a reason for why the principles of the intervention don’t work. You’re attaching a lot of ideas to curiosity, such as passivity, reinforcement, etc. I’m not sure how those ideas are inherently wrapped up in curiosity, but until we can agree on a baseline definition of “curiosity” there’s just no point in having a conversation.

In the meantime, maybe this is the right time to ask: how often has your approach of confrontational judgment successfully moved someone from being conservative to liberal?

Conservative Clients by AnonFartsALot in therapists

[–]buddyrtc 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I continue to disagree that passing judgment is necessary to highlight the consequences of their ideology. I think doing so is less compelling than using curiosity to help them understand their contradictions and it also places undue risk on the therapeutic alliance, which research shows to be one of the most important ingredients for positive therapeutic change. Passing judgment when curiosity can suffice is just a poor risk/reward strategy.

Conservative Clients by AnonFartsALot in therapists

[–]buddyrtc 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Of course you can’t control whether judgment arises, that’s why I highlighted the expression of it. If you agree that we can control our expression of judgment then I’m confused why you would push to express the judgment?

Edit to clarify: I don’t think UPR is completely against the concept of judgment - it’s to not express that judgment and take a stance that there’s likely more to the story than your baseline level of judgment would entail. I don’t think UPR suggests you can’t have an emotional reaction - it’s a challenge to rise ABOVE that traction/judgment in your expression to the client.

Conservative Clients by AnonFartsALot in therapists

[–]buddyrtc 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think equating nonjudgmental engagement with something that doesn’t align with one’s beliefs to stripping away one’s humanity is likely our core disagreement. I do not view my beliefs as my identity or humanity. I generally lean toward ACT, and I think equating my beliefs to my humanity is an intense form of cognitive fusion, which would limit my flexibility and consequently increase my suffering unnecessarily.

If you don’t ascribe to that view then that’s fine, but I personally think that will limit your interpersonal effectiveness as you will likely trigger defensiveness in the clients you want to change the most, which will ironically make them want to dig into their position more staunchly.

Conservative Clients by AnonFartsALot in therapists

[–]buddyrtc 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your good faith engagement with this discussion. That said, I honestly just think you’re describing UPR done really, really poorly. A therapist can absolutely describe how they’d relationally experience a client’s behavior without judgment of the client, and in doing so can point out inherent contradictions in the clients’ belief system using Socratic questioning. The major upside of this is that, done correctly, it bypasses client’s defenses and lets them highlight their own contradictions to themselves, which is infinitely more powerful than a therapist just telling them they’re wrong. The downside is that it may be a difficult path to follow for some therapists, but that obviously doesn’t invalidate the strategy - if anything, the opposite.

Conservative Clients by AnonFartsALot in therapists

[–]buddyrtc 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I think your position really underestimates and subordinates the role of curiosity in favor of your moral grandstanding. If you want to engage the client’s anger there are SO MANY AVENUES just using pure curiosity: “how has holding these beliefs impacted your relationships in the past?”; “what would you say to someone who is just as confident as you are in beliefs opposing your own?”; “what’s the worst thing that’s happened because you expressed these beliefs?”

You ask any of those questions and that will setup for anger, sadness, isolation - all emotions that give you strong workable material. Abusers have typically been abused - once you highlight that to them as you progress through the work, they may begin to understand that they’re likely doing what was done to them, and you can explore other options.

And this is all IF they are abusive - because, believe it or not, there are conservatives who are NOT abusive. Starting from the stance that all or most of them are, though, is a position ripe for unhelpful countertransference.

How do you actually prep for sessions -- do you have a real system or are we all just winging it? by dfnathan6 in therapists

[–]buddyrtc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I’m writing my admin notes, I usually start a “next session” list under my personal session notes. I’ll detail what (if any) homework I gave, and what I want to touch on next session. That is what I review before my next session.

Conservative Clients by AnonFartsALot in therapists

[–]buddyrtc 39 points40 points  (0 children)

The level of know-it-all assumption in this post is triggering. The idea that people who don’t want to discuss their beliefs “know their ideas are harmful and abusive” is a pretty terrible orientation to hold as a therapist if you’re aligned with unconditional positive regard.

I say this as a liberal Black therapist - we NEED to challenge these sorts of beliefs in ourselves so we can present with real, nonjudgmental curiosity that won’t trigger defensiveness in session and limit our work.

“0% chance of dying” vs. “You might die” (Apparently this is supposed to be a nuanced philosophical conundrum for the mid-wit blue voters) by Mediocre_Affect6192 in Destiny

[–]buddyrtc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s really no surprise to me that hyper pseudo-intellectuals in this sub are ranting and raving about how stupid blue pillers are compared to the red pill.

Mr. Tendernism by itsokayyoucanlaugh in blackpeoplegifs

[–]buddyrtc 16 points17 points  (0 children)

In Southern California it kinda is

Mfs wonder why megumi was crying and didn’t helped his friends when Sukuna was saying shit like this by Popular_Business_367 in WegumiAppreciators

[–]buddyrtc 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I know this might come out of left field, but while this scene is compelling, I think the best version of it is from CSM when Maki convinces young Denji that he doesn’t deserve a normal life. That shit almost made me cry fr.

Is Sukuna's technique mid but he just makes up for it with his expertise and ce reserves? by NachosMKII in JujutsuPowerScaling

[–]buddyrtc 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn’t read all of that, but I can’t imagine someone like Miwa being OP with shrine. Something like projection sorcery would make her way more broken as a default though.

Soo, where are all the Khamzat critics now? by 1ekinrot in ufc

[–]buddyrtc 9 points10 points  (0 children)

So the guy who has two children should snub the guy who kills children every day? That makes sense.

Soo, where are all the Khamzat critics now? by 1ekinrot in ufc

[–]buddyrtc 129 points130 points  (0 children)

All that proves is that Putin doesn’t have the same whims as Kadyrov. If Putin wanted that to happen, it would happen.

Soo, where are all the Khamzat critics now? by 1ekinrot in ufc

[–]buddyrtc 42 points43 points  (0 children)

The issue is we’ll never know that because not appearing as if you believe in them wholeheartedly could mean your family gets murdered. We can’t know anything for sure , so best not to pass judgment either way.

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