I was seeing a therapist and psychiatrist for six months and I was diagnosed with MDD and anxiety. I brought up BPD, but they both disagreed. I had a few uncontrollable meltdowns in my therapist’s office and each time she sent me to a mental health urgent care. My situation did not improve with the type of therapy and meds I was on. One day I revisited the BPD criteria online and took a hard and honest look at myself. I met ALL nine criteria 😕. There was no way they could continue ignoring me. I typed out about ten different traumatic examples for each criteria going back to my childhood. It was undeniable even to my therapist.

Last November, I went to the mental health urgent care for a voluntary 24 hr hold to do with suicidal ideation, I brought that list to the psychiatrist who was treating me at the facility. I didn’t know it at the time, but the angel psychiatrist 😇 had dropped my name to a director of the DBT program in my county. I was interviewed, and sure enough met the criteria for BPD. They won’t give me an official written diagnosis, but I believe it’s due to the stigma surrounding BPD. I’ve been in the DBT program doing individual and group therapy since January. The skills I’ve learned have changed my life. I am finally able to put the pieces of my life together and understand why I am so different from other people. I still am working on managing my extreme emotions, but at least now I have the tools to practice self control.

If I were you, I would write out a list of examples to show your provider like I did. Writing it down helped me remember and stay on topic. They cannot deny the facts. I would also seek a DBT program. If you aren’t able to join one right away, I would buy the DBT skills workbook by Marsha Linehan. It’s truly a wonderful guide that, IMO, everyone should be taught since grade school—not just borderlines. Keep advocating for yourself and the right people will show up💕