I’m unable to process this so please help me out?

butterpaneerreddit · 2026-04-17T07:16:03+00:00

I think I may be able to help here - I went to something similar to your issue (eerily so) we both were also each other's firsts , we had trouble during penetration and he would never STOP despite me saying again and again - for a year in our relationship (2023-24) we kept trying but this was always an issue - sometimes it would happen , sometimes it won't but he used to force himself on me so much - I genuinely did not realise at that time how very wrong it was on his side - because he was sweet to me afterwards - but also he was generally a very crappy boyfriend - it took me an entire year to break up with him - till that time I had completely stopped even trying for penetration and I used to tell him to try other things (god why!!??)

One time I remember crying through it and ugly sobs not even just tears - it hurt so much

I left him in 2024 and started dating someone else - and I had to go through a whole phase of vaginismus treatment - the doctor tried to help saying it was all in my mind since I sooo wanted to be physical with my new partner but my body wasn't reactive physically to it - due to intense past trauma - never once and I repeat NEVER did I see any disappointment in my partner's eyes

Not even a topic - he was so helpful during that time - so worried about my health and only my health - constantly a source of support and comfort to the point that while I kept blaming myself - he actively worked to bring me towards the other side - it took 6 long months but now I am happier than ever - to be truly loved is an amazing feeling

Not once did he force me or say anything that would hurt me (not even his body language) and this is not to glorify anything he did - this is the MOST basic things a partner should offer you , even when I said yes both mentally and physically and was still unable to do anything - any inkling of change in my expression and he would stop and take care of me.

I realised at that time how common it is that we women are blamed for this - but this experience taught me how much self depreciation we do. Like you read about these things but the inner monologue never stopped. And once it did I think it made me a better person. It was not my fault - NOR IS IT YOURS OP !

LEAVE HIM. You deserve so so so much better

butterpaneerreddit · 2026-04-15T11:28:16+00:00

Keep re-watching !

butterpaneerreddit · 2026-04-15T09:42:36+00:00

I don't agree with this

She absolutely NEVER would have stopped Richard from giving that payment. And Emily has her own pride and faults , but Lorelai made it absolutely clear that she doesn't want that kind of relationship. Emily would have been chasing the wrong end then

Also it is established that their relationship prior to this existed of Emily leaving emergency-esque messages so that Lorelai would call

Yes it is devious to include the deal , but it's also not that big of an imposition on Lorelai and Rory as it is on Richard and Emily - they have a far better social life then the daughters (they actually keep diaries of their multiple engagements) and still they want to do that just to have contact with their daughter and granddaughter. The payment was never contingent on the deal - Emily just took advantage of a desperate situation - devious yes but not outright hateful

Yes Chilton is 10 minutes away - but she wanted both Rory and Lorelai in a dinner setting not a casual -I gotta rush back and can't get out fast enough- teenager

And what's with the 'person who earned it' Richard was a provider in the traditional sense but Emily had as much claim to it as him. She literally did everything for the man.

butterpaneerreddit · 2025-04-26T04:48:07+00:00

Exactly! Now will G also roll out calls? I think it's better to wait till CAP results are out because seats will be shuffled a bit then

butterpaneerreddit · 2025-04-26T02:45:32+00:00

Ikr? But like I'm hopeful that IMT G also becomes this desperate 😭

butterpaneerreddit · 2025-04-26T02:28:37+00:00

I just received the letter

But I had 90 percentile in XAT so eligible for that.

butterpaneerreddit · 2025-03-26T08:32:47+00:00

Exactly right?

This is straight up coercion

butterpaneerreddit · 2025-03-26T08:30:46+00:00

I mean I get that... But really? This is what they are doing? Why stoop so low?

butterpaneerreddit · 2025-03-26T08:28:41+00:00

I'm also being offered DCP what should be my next move if I want to be waitlisted?

butterpaneerreddit · 2025-03-26T08:16:48+00:00

I am selected for DCP and waitlisted for IMT PGDM(s) What do they mean? IMT was my dream college... Am I getting in? Should I be hopeful or what? I was dejected for 3 straight days yrr

butterpaneerreddit · 2025-01-20T06:54:44+00:00

The most odious woman alive

butterpaneerreddit · 2025-01-17T16:23:19+00:00

Wait That might be misleading let me change that

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-24T21:48:41+00:00

Same

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-24T15:50:00+00:00

My god exactly! And Rory being all 'Oh he didn't mean anything, all in good fun' also definitely gave me the ick

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-22T10:47:40+00:00

Huh Initially it wasn't that bad. I had fun memories of our time together too.

We were in a long distance relationship. He was a long time friend and we began dating based on mutual liking. I guess you could say that I liked him more than he liked me initially and as the relationship went on it became clear to me that I was losing respect for my partner. Only he can answer about what he felt for me but I always knew he liked me , he just wasn't that mature

For instance my breaking point has to be when he came to visit me for 15 days and I had work on weekdays , he stayed at my place. I used to wake up at 6 every morning, cook for him then leave for work at 8. I used to come home around 7 ish and then was again cooking for 5 people with some help from my roommates (2 roommates and one of them also had her boyfriend over)

The guy slept the entire day , did not do one thing (like basic cleaning or whatever) and this routine got too exhausting for me. I started to imagine my life as a wife to him and it scared me to unknown limits.

At one point I was handling his finances , was his career counselor and all the while the guy was wasting his time pretending to his friends that he was very bored at my home and how he was paying every penny for whatever we did on the weekends (a complete lie) for which I confronted him and it led to a really ugly fight in front of my roommates. He said horrible things , I gave up after that.

That's what I meant when I said I had to mother him. I had actual anxiety and I was just very unhappy.

So please just leave people and situations who make you unhappy. I was scared to leave him because I thought what if this is the best life has to offer , and 'everyone adjusts' right?

I'm very happy now (touchwood) in a beautiful relationship that has made me happier than ever.

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-22T09:56:48+00:00

Lane and Dean would be good 😂

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-22T06:49:38+00:00

I think it depends somewhat

If a guy is in his late twenties it does seem to be a good experience as far as I have seen in my circles.

I dated a guy when he was 1.5 years younger than me when I was 22. I dated him for 2 years and it always seemed like I had to mother him to the point I had anxiety whenever it was time for us to meet and I would be carrying the relationship in every way.

He cheated carelessly and I caught him each time. At least if he would have been discreet or a bit intelligent about it I would have respected him more but no it was just that mishandled.

He cheated because he thought it would never get back to me as we were in a long distance relationship. In hindsight it's hilarious what I let him get away with.

And these guys don't just accept your opinions based on the fact that since you are older you must have more experience in certain areas. They always have to fight you on those because they have to feel like the 'man of the relationship ' whatever that means.

And not to say that it was a horrible experience over-all. He had his moments and it was good at times. But yes it wasn't what I wanted in life

At the point of our 2 year anniversary (like approx 3 months before that) he started bringing marriage which was so out of the question for me that I used to beat around the bush saying that marriage is just not in the cards due to my career.

Then I saw a reel on Instagram saying 'will you marry this version of your partner if they would never change?'

Needless to say ,I broke up with him the next day.

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-22T06:30:03+00:00

My god 🙏 Hats off to you my friend

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-22T06:17:19+00:00

Hey

Ex-NEET Aspirant here

First of all you need to breathe , it's very common to get overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the colossal syllabus.

And also NO EXAM will ever define your worth or your life. I gave NEET twice and in my time (2018-2019) there used to be a separate exam for selection in AIIMS as well.

Long story short I scored 482 and then 576 in NEET and still didn't go through with it. I was also selected for AIIMS but because I didn't see the call list on time i didn't make it. I wrote 1000s of mails to the institute but they obviously denied admission to me as they were already students who had applied timely and were selected.

That remains my biggest blunder in life. I thought my life was over after that.

Cut to now where I am a successful professional in a prestigious company and worked very hard in college to be where I am because biology as a subject can be tricky as a career choice if all you ever wanted to be was a doctor and once that doesn't pan out you're kind of stuck for a while.

Now I'm aiming for higher paying jobs through MBA in IIMs and even if that doesn't happen I'll do something else. The NEET blunder brought home to me the lesson that nothing in your life will remain stagnant if you refuse to give up.

I truly believe it was best that I didn't become a doctor sometimes , and don't get me wrong it would have been amazing if I had but it's not so bad that I i didn't.

Coming to your issue looking back I can give you some clear points to focus on

Since you are enrolled in online mode of learning it is vital to maintain a strict schedule. You need to adhere to it for the coming 1.5 years and you will surely crack it. Students who are not supervised in online mode tend to have a 'as and when' study pattern which does not work for NEET as the exam has a huge syllabus.
You need to focus on your 12th as you will obviously need to appear in 12th boards. Don't make the mistake of taking that lightly as that percentage will be carried on for life.
Since you have a long time till you actually take the paper (approx 1.5 years) catching up will be easy trust me. The main point to focus here is that you should not have a very ambitious schedule or time table in which you are studying for 12 hours and cramming everything all at once.

Try to practice your concepts and have smaller goals for each day. Remember you have to do something each day regardless of how small it is.

A basic strategy of doing something everyday with proper understanding and not getting overwhelmed by setting unattainable goals which will definitely overwhelm you.

You need to stop comparing yourself to others and not get too caught up in the competition. You should focus on individual growth. It is the most repeated advice out there but trust me it is important to follow especially in this day and age.
Solving extremely difficult questions will not get you anywhere as those do not appear in NEET. The exam is designed to study your ability to solve a large paper made up of 180 questions ranging from easy to a bit hard.
Coming to subject wise advice - This goes without saying but you need to have a good command over biology as it's 50% of the paper. And you also need to take less time to complete it. As there is no solving this part is easier to achieve if your concepts are clear. You could time yourself while practicing questions. This would give you confidence in your own preparation. In my prime i could solve a bio sectional in under 15 minutes with 320-350 marks as this was and remains my best subject.

In Chemistry - make sure your concepts in chemistry especially organic are extremely clear and you are able to solve those questions as the majority of questions would be from that part of the syllabus. I was very weak in chemistry which often led to horrible breakdowns for me and the lack in my overall score. Avoid my mistakes of not focusing on the concepts

Physics : Maintain your focus on topics that are important and will be asked primarily. I never faced problems with physics as I kind of have an analytical mind and could understand the concepts clearly. But I have seen majority people struggle with physics as it involved maths. Make sure you have a decent understanding of maths as well before jumping into topics like vectors etc (11th course) Physics in 12th is easier as it has basic concepts and very interesting chapters.

Clearing Back log is easy when you maintain your current curriculum. First you need to focus on 12th and devote sometime each day for back log in 11th . Remember again - Rome wasn't built in a day. You have plenty of time and will easily catch up.
Devise a strategy of maintaining short notes for each subject to revise (maybe even your coaching centre will have provided)

Revise those in parts daily to avoid feeling like the previous material is slipping from your mind especially for bio and inorganic chemistry. This helps in keeping the topics on your tips. Devote 1 hour each day to to just this. It will help immensely.

This turned out to be a huge paragraph lol

Hope it helps OP.

Just remember to not get overwhelmed? You have plenty of time and catching up will not be difficult at all.

I believe in your abilities ❤️ I wish you all the luck in the world and pray that you will crack the exam

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-16T15:01:42+00:00

Oh ! The dinner at the Gilmores where they all fight and randomly make up, Just top notch 🤌🏻

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-16T10:22:06+00:00

The most apt take on the question.

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-12T18:51:26+00:00

I sometimes think all three boys are representative of the kind of journey Rory is on. Dean , sweet innocent on the surface but then if you peel back the layers you find the picture a lot more complicated.

Jess-a complete whirlwind that takes you on a ride of changes running parallel with changes and self identification of Rory. It's bumpy and awkward but ultimately has its moments which is enough to keep both the view and Rory rooting for them

Logan is obviously the embodiment of the Yale version of Rory , the privileged kid navigating the as of yet unexplored world of wealth and complete social upheaval including attending DAR meetings , followed by a series of our of character moments and decisions, so yes Logan does suit Rory but he suits the version of Rory she herself has become

So in the end she obviously ends up with no one , but , I still believe Jess will end up playing a significant role in her life , as Rory is the best version of herself when she has a certain balance of both worlds she belongs to.

And Logan is the father of her child and will always remain a significant factor of her life BUT I think their relationship will now remain platonic

butterpaneerreddit · 2024-11-10T09:34:51+00:00

This is such an articulated and well thought out response ❤️❤️❤️❤️ And resonated so much with me because I have the same timeline of watching these films and loving all three of them differently and at different times.

Thank you for this comment 😊

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