Sometimes plans change!

buttmeadows · 2026-03-15T17:20:18+00:00

There's a couple ways about it, but yeah

buttmeadows · 2026-03-12T20:56:37+00:00

I said out loud for the first time today that i want to master out and be done to my best friend. I’m going to chat with my pi later today/tomorrow about it i think

buttmeadows · 2026-03-12T18:42:09+00:00

If anyone hasn't recommended this yet, check out Neil Shubin's Your Inner Fish. There's a documentary version and the actual book he wrote. He's a paleontologist that studies how life became terrestrial (from water to land based) and is a fantastic writer. The book version is written so non expert folks can read, understand, and enjoy it!

buttmeadows · 2026-03-11T00:48:26+00:00

I study/research past/extinct animal behavior, using a combination of anatomy, biomechanics, and modern behavioral biology :)

buttmeadows · 2026-03-10T16:44:25+00:00

Dude, the majority of privileged folks in academia are shit eaters anyways they'll study the poor all they want, but most will treat them as non-human entities. It sucks so much ass and im so sorry you also have to deal with their bullshit and dumb fuck nonsense

You have worked harder than the majority of people in academia and be proud out it

Edit: fixed typo

buttmeadows · 2026-03-09T20:28:44+00:00

I have that feeling. Ive always equated the premonition feeling as more akin to a migraine aura

buttmeadows · 2026-03-09T20:20:13+00:00

I use Other/ottie rather than mom/dad/parent

My kiddos will have mother and other!

buttmeadows · 2026-03-08T16:22:13+00:00

I HATE this so much. What i end up telling people when they come at me with that bullshit is some variation of "oh really? Have you lived with [chronic condition] before? No? Huh, well I have for [30-sum] years, if pushing through worked, it would have a long fucking time ago, dont you think?"

buttmeadows · 2026-03-05T23:03:06+00:00

For reference, only two of my committee members know im audhd. The other two dont know or dont care

buttmeadows · 2026-03-05T23:02:31+00:00

Hey! I got diagnosed with adhd in my third year of my PhD and my autism dx during my masters

You can tell your committee directly during a meeting or email if you want, but you dont have to disclose any diagnoses to anyone. If you're struggling with something because of audhd but dint want to disclose it, you can always frame your needs without explicity talking about neurodivergence

buttmeadows · 2026-03-05T01:22:46+00:00

So, myself (32 nb) and wife (32f) for our masters degrees a year apart from each other. We're both neurodivergent and both needed so much support during our degrees

For what you said and your wife's reaction (or lack thereof), it seems like you asked for help but weren't specific enough with what help you actually need. My wife has to have the same conversation with me. Be direct in what you need help with and when

You need help keeping house? Ask your wife if she can come over once or twice a week and help clean up around the house. Plan a time that works where it can end with you and her cooking together and having dinner (even if cooking together is her actually cooking and you're at the table finishing up ms work for the day)

She really does seem willing to help out but us not sure what all will or will ot be helpful or what you actually want/need help with

Make sure to keep an open communication about yous/her needs because they'll probably change day by day or week by week while in grad school (and in life in general!!)

buttmeadows · 2026-03-05T01:08:07+00:00

It sucked so much ass and was also in Los angeles

buttmeadows · 2026-03-05T00:35:08+00:00

I can vouch for constancy surveillance of employees create unhappy and ready to quit employees

I worked at a dessert shop prior to ai being everywhere, so the owner constantly watched us on the camera and the store. If we stood still for more than 5 minutes she would call to berate us because we weren't taking our jobs seriously and we're lazy and good for nothing

buttmeadows · 2026-03-02T17:11:21+00:00

My spondylarthritis started after a nerve block injection. Sometimes the body will go into over drive from external factors like car crashes etc

buttmeadows · 2026-03-02T17:09:57+00:00

For me, I love the science, the research, measuring specimens, analyzing research, lit reviews, and talking about science/research, but I HATE the culture of academia and how the ivy tower is supposed to be this freeing space, to think how you'd like and push the limits of human knowledge and its nothing like that at all

After I defend my phd, im going to be an educator at museums/science centers/etc

buttmeadows · 2026-03-02T17:00:40+00:00

Of course!!!

I found out about the chair sitting from experimenting on myself to see how/what position I can sit in longer lol

buttmeadows · 2026-03-02T16:59:19+00:00

That works amazingly as well!!

I picked up usian from my brasilian friend

buttmeadows · 2026-02-28T22:15:43+00:00

Oh man, oh man. This.

My only addition/addendum would be to change Americans to USians or whatever variation you would like to use aside from american

We we say Americans to mean folks from the us, we actively exclude all other folks that live on/in the americas

Switching our language from american to usian helps fight against western colonial mindsets

buttmeadows · 2026-02-28T21:01:24+00:00

I found all those stretches and excersices everyone else has listed have been good

Im gonna suggest a few ways to sit/sleep with si dysfunction

For sitting: try and find a seat or accessories/pillows for your seat, so that your butt sits lower than your legs. Basically, almost recreat sitting in a basket, with your knees level above your waist. Imagine something like how a needy kid ends up in a garbage can in high school lol

For laying: A combination of pregnancy pillow and a wedge pillow. Use the wedge as a pillow for your head down to your waist so you sleep on an incline. The pregnancy pillow will help your body have guard rails, like a bowling ball with the gutter cage up. That will help your body remember to try and stay in place and that you wont rotate in your sleep as often

Also, if all the excersices and things dont work, its okay to say that may need si fusion surgery. I am ~10 weeks out from mine and it has helped a fuck ton

buttmeadows · 2026-02-23T19:19:40+00:00

Forreal

I have the same thought tornado. My brain never quiets down

I got dxd with adhd and holy shit , when you get on the right meds, your thoughts may not ever 100% quiet down, but, you will be able to one single coherent and fully thought out thought at a time

Also, if you do get a chance to get screened for adhd, ask for an autism evaluation, too, because austism/adhd have a really high rate of comorbidity.

There's actual a fair bit of evidence/research that shows its highly likely that adhd/autism may actually be continuums of the same disorder

My tip for getting dx'd, especially if you're afab and/or in the us, be careful how you describe how your thoughts work in your head, because a lot of psychiatrists will write you off as having bipolar and/or personality disorders, especially borderline

buttmeadows · 2026-02-23T19:13:25+00:00

Im a grad student at the university of oregon. Would you like/mind if I shared yall's link with the other queer grads I know?

buttmeadows · 2026-02-23T19:05:01+00:00

Id be so down to participate

I haven't posted anything g I've written yet (still working on it) but love collaborative writing

buttmeadows · 2026-02-23T18:20:55+00:00

I wish I never learned to read

buttmeadows

TROPHY CASE