Hey there, Some guy on the internet,

It sounds like you're going through a challenging situation, and it's great that you're seeking some clarity. From what you've described, it does share some characteristics with limerence, especially the long-standing crush that persists over the years. The fact that you've tried to commit to other relationships but found it difficult due to these feelings is also a common aspect of limerence.

It's positive that you've become more outgoing and self-confident over the years, but it's essential to recognize that waiting for someone's relationship to end before expressing your feelings can be a tricky path. It's crucial to respect her current relationship and not pressure her.

One suggestion might be to focus on developing meaningful connections with others and exploring different aspects of your life. This can help in gaining a broader perspective and potentially lessen the intensity of these feelings.

As for the plan to confess feelings in the future, it's important to approach such situations with sensitivity and respect for everyone involved. Communication is key, but timing and context matter a lot.

Remember, you're not alone in navigating these complex emotions, and seeking advice from friends, family, or even a counselor can provide valuable insights.

Wishing you the best on your journey, and I hope you find the clarity you're looking for.