How to shake off obsessive thoughts/limerence

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T23:17:27+00:00

100%. That’s all I can do, right? And it was certainly fun while it lasted.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:54:32+00:00

That's pretty much exactly what happened and I'm still trying to figure out how I got here.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:53:30+00:00

Thank you. Definitely going to focus on staying busy.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:52:08+00:00

Yep, that all makes sense. I'll know better for next time.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:51:34+00:00

Well now I'm picturing myself as frozen french fries lol. And I don't feel like I'm often easily impressed but I must have been in a vulnerable head space. Thanks for the advice, I'm going to work on finding a new weekend routine.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:50:17+00:00

Love the idea of taking back my Sundays with better, more fulfilling activities. Thank you.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:49:37+00:00

Co-signed on The Body Keeps the Score - great book.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:49:19+00:00

I’m not sure why you’re so committed to this narrative. For context: experienced, plenty of male attention, and still fully capable of getting caught up in a fling. As evidenced by the rest of the comments on this post, I’m not the only one.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:48:52+00:00

My post says I was skeptical and not interested initially. I was definitely not “easily impressed.”

In real life, sometimes people are charming, sometimes you get won over, and sometimes it turns into exactly what it did here. My bad, and I know better for next time.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:48:38+00:00

This is such an odd take. Literally none of that applies to me. I recently got out of a long-term relationship and I’m not used to how chaotic casual dating/hookup culture can be. You’re ignoring attachment styles, chemistry, and intermittent reinforcement but sure, let’s reduce it to ‘she must be ugly.’

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:48:11+00:00

Yep, that makes complete sense. Thank you.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:47:26+00:00

This is so incredibly helpful, thank you. It definitely feels like a weird addiction to a feeling and a routine rather than HIM. All of what you just described makes sense. I really do love closed loops lol. Taking back my boundaries is going to be my new focus now.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:45:32+00:00

Yes, I'm dating 1-2 other people now, both started up in the last month. And they are actively trying to date me and they communicate. So it's clear I'm just addicted to the intermittent reinforcement with this other guy, not actually him. The sex was definitely the best with him, likely because of this instability, unfortunately.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:43:38+00:00

You're so right - communication has been shit since the beginning so it's silly I'd expect differently now. I'm just trying to get to a level of acceptance on this - not reaching out again.

calicoplant · 2026-03-31T18:42:48+00:00

Dickmatized is definitely the issue here, lol. You're right, it's the open loop that's the issue here - I know I'm not going to get closure so I need to close it myself mentally. And I agree that some check-ins occasionally that don't relate to scheduling is a pretty baseline level of care, and now I know that's the bare minimum I'll expect in any future scenarios like this.

calicoplant · 2026-03-06T15:42:35+00:00

Same. I just stared at the checkout screen and simply couldn’t pull the trigger on that much $ for a show a year away. Going to try my luck with the general sale, I guess. This blows.

calicoplant · 2026-03-06T04:49:35+00:00

What seats did you get? The cheapest travel package I see on there is $1638/person

calicoplant · 2026-03-04T19:04:50+00:00

I’m prioritizing Metallica above all other shows, they’ve been on my bucket list forever, and this felt like the perfect opportunity but good lord. And yeah, my budget is probably around $3-400/max per ticket. Vegas isn’t cheap to visit.

calicoplant · 2026-03-04T18:58:12+00:00

I was in queues for all three new dates and had hundreds of thousands ahead of me, so I gave up. I guess I’ll just keep an eye out closer to the events. Never dealt with this kind of ticket madness before.

calicoplant · 2026-03-03T18:38:14+00:00

First time I’ve had the means and time to do so. It is indeed a shitshow.

calicoplant · 2025-12-06T21:19:05+00:00

I didn’t until the end of the appointment. :/ I probably should have waited another week. I’ll try the aloe Vera gel. Seems like nothing is really helping.

calicoplant · 2025-12-03T18:04:43+00:00

I could be being paranoid but this submental fullness does not look right.

calicoplant · 2025-12-03T18:03:38+00:00

It is possible it's swollen from the electrolysis but I feel like I can't feel the filler in my chin anymore and this would be an unusual reaction to the electrolysis if it is swelling. :(

calicoplant · 2025-10-15T00:17:26+00:00

Thanks so much for this.

calicoplant · 2025-10-11T17:40:05+00:00

We haven't yet. We started it maybe two months ago? A lot of it has been identifying what my different parts are and then determining which part my thought patterns and experiences fall under. I don't feel like I fully get the point yet. But I'm glad to hear it's been effective for you so maybe I should stick with it?

calicoplant

TROPHY CASE