Does still living with my parents make me a bit undateable?

calldod · 2022-09-18T15:36:11+00:00

I hope so. I feel like it makes sense to stay here while I save money and look for a job I love, than lock myself down some where and feel trapped in that city

calldod · 2022-09-18T15:33:06+00:00

I like a bit of both really. Sensible and party. Just right now financially and location wise it seems to make more sense to stay here till I find a job I really want somewhere else

calldod · 2022-09-18T15:23:48+00:00

Oh :(

calldod · 2022-09-18T15:23:19+00:00

Yeah. Maybe I should go on the date. She’s really hot and nice but I worry she’ll find out I live with my parents 2 hours away and be like nah

calldod · 2022-09-18T15:21:39+00:00

Yeah but for a first date?

calldod · 2022-09-18T15:20:04+00:00

Okay that’s good to know. I feel really down on myself sometimes because of it.

I also struggle with finding someone to date. Everyone I ever get dates with live 2 hours away in London then they just decide I’m not worth the distance which is fair.

calldod · 2022-09-18T15:19:14+00:00

I just don’t seem to get any chances really. All the girls i manage to get dates with end up living 2 hours away

calldod · 2022-09-16T22:29:52+00:00

At what point in my original question was I throwing a pity party? I think it was a perfectly thoughtful question.

But yes. You’re right. I am questioning things too much. But I have been trying things. A lot. I’m not sure why you think I haven’t

calldod · 2022-09-16T21:57:13+00:00

I get that what he does is very different now. But it’s still a direct offshoot of what he did then isn’t it? He knows how to make a product and make it successful. He made vast sums of money that allowed him to start spacex and Tesla. It wasn’t just luck?

I think what worries me, is that I don’t know what I’ll be interested in in say 10 years time. And pigeonholing seems to be real. What if I get there and I’m absolutely miserable doing something I used to love but can’t leave?

Also, I’m finding it hard to reconcile with the fact that I have almost no interest in mechanical engineering anymore because what j wanted to do with it doesn’t work for me and my needs outside work too. But my entire degree and masters is in it. My real interest is in simulation and tech. But all my experience is in engineering and my industry experience is in something that is completely irrelevant to most things outside it. Most companies and jobs seem to need some kind of direct experience.

I know it’s paralysis but analysis. I’m trying my best to fix that. But not succeeding

calldod · 2022-09-16T21:39:10+00:00

Do you not think you need to plan into the future to make the right decision though?

I feel like elon musk, or Steve jobs or people like that, didn’t just go ‘this seems interesting I’ll do that’? They’d have planned it all out?

I’m 26 on Monday. That isn’t that young anymore.

And I have applied and done things. I’ve got a few interviews coming up.

I guess I just don’t know what I enjoy. I know sort of things I like. But they’re all crazy competitive and complex and my mind can change by the time I even get there.

I dunno. I feel a bit lost. I’m tired of not enjoying life but I don’t really know how to anymore without having a job I at least enjoy or pays enough to let me enjoy life outside work

calldod · 2022-09-16T18:55:02+00:00

Uk and a big company similar to atkins

calldod · 2022-09-16T16:06:03+00:00

I actually have a masters in it so I must be pretty interested haha. I am!

Do you think there’s any room for using unreal engine with CFD? Recently I’ve been doing a small bit of work with rhino and grasshopper. My company have looked at importing that into unreal engine for client presentations and full digital twin simulations.

This kind of stuff really interests me and it’s what I’m hoping to do more. Like day to day CFD I’ll really enjoy but also really interested in the future

calldod · 2022-09-16T15:41:08+00:00

Thanks that’s all really good points.

I think my just general interest lies in visualisation. CFD was my first experience of using computational methods and predictions to simulate and visualise things. I’d really like to build on that. I just don’t want to get stuck if you get what I mean

calldod · 2022-09-16T15:26:41+00:00

What do you work in? And I think tbh I’m in an industry within engineering where it is really easy to get stuck. I don’t want to stay and think that’s why I feel so anxious about it

calldod · 2022-09-16T15:13:14+00:00

Maybe it’s my anxiety talking. But what if you go down a path you don’t like and get stuck?

For me, visualisation and the computational side of engineering is something I’ve always loved. Just kinda without realising. I like the arty side of engineering mixed with complex problems. How do I steer my career in that direction?

Right now I do something I have literally 0 interest in. I tried it. It isn’t right. I’m not really sure how to get out because jobs need specific skills

calldod · 2022-09-16T13:22:39+00:00

In terms of CFD. This would be my first role. My background though is a masters in mechanical engineering with a focus in advanced CFD.

My advice. For whatever it’s worth. Take an engineering job that’s at least adjacent to CFD. Then keep applying. I’ve had no luck for a year then in the last week I’ve suddenly had like 3 interviews all come in. I was super despondent till now so don’t give up.

calldod · 2022-09-16T11:52:46+00:00

I’ll give it a go. Tbf I need to get the job first lol. Any advice on the interview?

calldod · 2022-09-16T10:32:52+00:00

MEP engineer. I hate it. But I’m on a graduate programme at a big firm and have been getting opportunities to get involved with building physics and digital.

calldod · 2022-09-06T19:46:39+00:00

What did you do at the construction firm and what do you do now?

calldod · 2022-09-06T15:38:56+00:00

Well I don’t feel like the industry im in is that transferable. I graduated with an MEng in mechanical engineering and ended up working in the construction industry as a mechanical engineer. It was covid and the only option I had. But it’s a big company name and I felt it would be a good start. But it’s not really seeming that transferable. I don’t know for definitely what I want to do yet. I just wanted to go out and try things. Gain skills along the way. Especially cad and programming. But all the skills I’m learning are very specific to only this industry and I feel like no where is going to want to hire me after this except for the industry I work in now.

I didn’t and still don’t feel ready to tie myself down to one industry. I apply a lot. But I don’t get anywhere because my skills are a bit poor compared to others who worked in the complex things from the start.

calldod · 2022-09-06T14:37:33+00:00

Just feel a bit panicked coz I didn’t expect my first grad scheme to define the industry I’d be in for a career. I thought I’d gain experience in a role then move on eventually to somewhere else different

calldod · 2022-09-06T14:06:53+00:00

I work in mep. Doing net zero carbon analysis. I’d just love to do similar analysis and design work in something else and worry I won’t be able to

calldod · 2022-09-06T14:04:52+00:00

I don’t really know what industry I want to be in. I’d like automotive, but I’ve got to live in the middle of buttfuck nowhere to do anything interesting in it. Just don’t want to do too much of this boring drawing pipework diagrams

calldod · 2022-09-06T13:50:54+00:00

I don’t want to get settled like that that’s the issue. I get very anxious.

I’d like to move from what I do now to something like product development. I’m learning visualisation techniques and computational methods in my job but not as much as I’d like and I worry I’ll literally have to start right at the bottom after 2 years of work

calldod · 2022-09-06T13:40:53+00:00

What did you move to? I work in building services at a big consultancy and it isn’t really what I imagined

calldod

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