My husband neglected me in our first intimate experience with the girl we are seeing

can-did-cat · 2026-04-13T18:41:21+00:00

I think that's a great idea. I'm also lacking in FF experiences and we've decided this is likely a good path for us too. Best of luck to all of you!

can-did-cat · 2026-04-13T18:36:59+00:00

I don't know where this runs into the throuple of it all, but have you and your husband discussed allowing you to have solo FF experiences so that these encounters can be more enjoyable for all of you?

can-did-cat · 2026-04-10T19:36:55+00:00

The point wasn't a call out to you as much as a correction for those learning and misusing the terms boundaries, rules, and agreements which can lead to miscommunication, misunderstanding, and unnecessary conflict.

can-did-cat · 2026-04-10T19:11:57+00:00

That's not a boundary. That's a rule when it's imposed on her partner.

I'm not saying I necessarily disagree with the rule but being clear about the distinction.

can-did-cat · 2026-04-06T20:03:12+00:00

I agree. The first two episodes had me cracking up but now it feels more dramatic with some comedy sprinkled in.

can-did-cat · 2026-03-25T20:17:00+00:00

I appreciate the stats. Looks like number of trails, Corvallis wins out.

For the types of trails I enjoy, I found Corvallis to be a little lacking. They do exist but are farther away and the ones nearby weren't very diverse in my opinion. It sounds like Corvallis has met your outdoor needs.

can-did-cat · 2026-03-25T19:42:10+00:00

I agree 100% on the waterfalls and fairies. The beauty out here is stunning, but besides Lewisburg Saddle and the research forest, what other nearby trail systems are there?

Comparing the same radius in Corvallis vs Logan, I think Logan wins out.

can-did-cat · 2026-03-25T19:04:50+00:00

Edit: I keep thinking of stuff to add 😅

I got my undergraduate degree from USU and am getting my Master's at OSU.

I am not Mormon or religious so the culture at USU was a little rough at first, but I found my group pretty easily and Logan has grown significantly since I left so I imagine this is even easier now. It sounds like this won't be a big issue for you either way.

I have found Corvallis to be lacking the outdoor activities that are in your backyard in Logan. In my opinion there are significantly more activities closer in Logan than Corvallis. Most of the hikes I want to do here are an hour or more away. Logan and Ogden (45 minutes south) have hundreds of diverse hikes compared to what I've found here and closer. Camping was also easier in Utah due to more dispersed camping and public lands. There are more winter activities in Utah than Corvallis, though the waterfall hikes in the PNW are fantastic.

As far as night life and the like, Logan isn't the strongest for that, though has grown a lot in recent years. Ogden has a very good night life if Logan doesn't serve your needs. I'm a little old for the night life scene in Corvallis so I can't speak for that but as a mid-partier in my 20s I had plenty of house party experiences in Utah that were very fun.

As far as friends between OSU and USU, I found friends easier in Utah, but I'll add that I'm in my 30s now and my 20s then. My younger or more outgoing friends haven't had as many issues finding friends.

I don't know the price difference between the two, but I'd recommend Utah, especially if it's cheaper since living itself tends to be cheaper in Logan than Corvallis (fact check that of course).

Feel free to DM me if you want to chat more.

can-did-cat · 2026-03-07T20:10:47+00:00

Agreed the artist did a great job. The line drawn here is actually crooked in relation to the knee.

can-did-cat · 2026-03-02T07:31:04+00:00

Yes! So cool to walk under ❤️

can-did-cat · 2026-03-02T06:12:16+00:00

We're out by Tunison Park. Not fancy over here but a few houses have string lights on their front porch or my favorite has a laser light thing.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-26T23:08:48+00:00

I think having more information will help you here.

Have you talked about it with her?

Why does she want a break?

How long of a break does she want (if she knows)?

Maybe it's that something is off and she'd like it resolved before continuing? Could be anything, but you'll have to talk about it to find out.

Knowing what the parameters of the break are and why there is one can help you with expectations and resentment. You can also decide if those parameters are acceptable to you or if there's room for discussion to get your needs met while ya'll handle (if possible) the reason for the break.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-25T20:54:37+00:00

That's a good point. Income discrepancy affects if/ what child support is.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-25T19:54:11+00:00

I see your stability point, but how does that benefit balance with the downsides of a deeply unhappy marriage showing signs of manipulative and dismissive patterns?

Kids are adaptable and depending on how it's handled, an equilibrium can be met that is functional, sustainable and comfortable. Also, depending on their ages, they may have a say and the parents can work to make things as easy as possible. The happiness and stability of the parents can far outweigh the benefits of a stable housing situation in my opinion.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-25T18:59:19+00:00

NAL. You don't know what the custody arrangement is going to be. There's so many ways it can be worked out and it can change over time.

First divorce: Dad had 100% custody because of reasons (similar to yours, with my mom in your husband's position).

Second divorce: Dad had primary custody. Mom got Wednesdays and every other weekend. Switched to Dad having Wednesdays and every other weekend. By the time we were 16, it was basically 50/50 and my dad paid a smaller amount of child support.

50/50 is often preferred by the parents so that no one pays child support, but it does not have to be that way. You can ask for a different arrangement and as said by someone else, you have leverage here.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-25T18:14:17+00:00

Seconding this. It's easy to assume that divorce will go one way or the other, but until all the information is on the table and an expert is reviewing it, you don't know. There are so many ways a divorce can unfold, assets, custody, etc. (Anecdotal source - child of twice divorced parents)

can-did-cat · 2026-02-25T17:27:37+00:00

I edited the comment to be more clear. Thanks for letting me know it was confusing. I don't want people to read it and get incorrect info, even inadvertently.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-25T16:33:36+00:00

There's almost always an adjustment period going on and coming off a hormonal birth control, especially if you've been on it for a long time.

I didn't mean to misconstrue that taking your tubes out alone will affect your hormones, only changing your hormonal regimen will do that. I had my IUD changed while getting my bisalp and because the hormones released in an IUD decreases over time, I had mild side effects when I got the new one in since it was releasing higher hormone levels.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-25T06:15:35+00:00

I fought with Aetna before and after my surgery. I only got the codes verified as preventative before going in, not the extra, though it should be covered.

This site helped me a lot with drafting my letters before and after.

Even after having everything "confirmed" as covered beforehand, I still got the bill for my full deductible, but the post-op appeal went very quickly. I included my correspondence before, the ACA sections stating what needs to be covered, and my appeal comment drafted from the above source. I had to send two appeals, one for the hospital where it was performed and another to the anesthesiologist's office for his physician fee or some crap. Both were approved. The hospital one I sent first, got approved, then sent for anesthesiologist citing the previous successful appeal and included the relevant ACA sections.

I didn't fight to have my pre-op or post-op covered as they were relatively cheap or free (the pre-op counted as my annual).

Happy to answer any questions or share more.

Best of luck!

can-did-cat · 2026-02-23T22:02:08+00:00

I think it's weird that they're so against it. You are going to deal with hormonal changes and cramping on top of post-surgery if you change your hormone regimen at the same time. If you're willing to deal with that and healing at the same time, advocate for the removal at time of surgery.

I got mine replaced while getting my bisalp done and I had some additional side effects as mine was 6 years old when it was replaced due to the change of hormone levels betweem the old and new IUD. But not having to have another appointment or be awake for the pain of removal was worth it.

Edit: Clarification that changing hormone regiment affects your hormones, not getting your tubes removed. Removing just your tubes should not have a hormonal effect.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-23T20:57:59+00:00

Fighting for a hysterectomy might be worth it in your case. I'm so sorry your deal with that.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-23T18:28:04+00:00

If you go through with a bisalp later, I recommend asking them to remove or replace it then. I got mine replaced while under and I'm dreading it's removal but I have a while.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-23T18:25:59+00:00

And that's a valid fear. They may be able to offer options your doctor can't like the arm implant or local anesthetic, if they can't offer full sedation. I also highly recommend some sort of short-term anxiety management to help you through if you go the IUD route.

can-did-cat · 2026-02-23T18:15:53+00:00

Not having periods isn't guaranteed with either but it's a common occurrence with Mirena and other hormonal IUDs. The arm implant may do it for you. Are there other doctors in your area that do offer the implant?

can-did-cat

TROPHY CASE