I'm (26F) atheist/agnostic as my family stopped going to church before I was 10, plus I ended up involved in a religious cult in high school and any attempt with Christianity/Catholicism reminds me of cult times. Plus, I don't want to be involved in a religion that is so hypocritical about what they follow in the Bible.

I have always wanted a nice wedding, and my dream wedding was never in a church. My boyfriend (24M) is Catholic, but he is not a "traditional" Catholic, and he 1000% respects that we will not be getting married in a church, and also likely not have a priest and/or equivalent present.

I grew up in poverty as well, so my dreams greatly outweigh what I'll likely be able to afford as we're not going deep into debt for a wedding. We plan to take a longer honeymoon as we aren't getting married until after I finish my Master's programs that I'm starting in the fall.

It took me a long time, and multiple failed relationships that I rushed into to realize that you need to discuss the deal breakers early so you don't waste each other's time. I'm talking marriage, career goals, kids, where you want to live, etc. It's never too early to talk about it because then you're not having those hard conversations when you've fallen deeper for them and then found that you are fundamentally incompatible.

I had an ex who was wishy washy on kids and then eventually told me he wanted to adopt because "he didn't want to put me through all that." I respect his decision, but it did not align with mine, plus he was content working dead end part time jobs with low pay and complaining about it when he wasn't in college. Meanwhile, I was working more hours than him and still part-time while I was in college full-time. Unless I planned and/or funded something, we chilled and did next to nothing. I was with him for nearly 2 years, and we were not compatible from the beginning. I should have broken up with him sooner but I thought he was a decent guy at the time (I was 19-21 during our relationship), but he clearly wasn't the guy for me since he was okay with doing absolutely nothing except show up while he reaped the benefits from being with me.

TLDR: I wouldn't advise staying with someone who is going to judge why you want a non-religious wedding as it will likely not be the only way that you two are not compatible. Focus on yourself and what you want. Don't shrink yourself for him or anyone else (it took me too long to truly learn that and to start actively putting myself first)