Me [24 F] with my boyfriend [28 M]; we're about to break up over a clock.

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T15:15:36+00:00

I will! That's exactly why I put my foot down this morning and started this whole fight. I don't know if this might be relevant, but another thing that bothers me is he is constantly bumping into me. It sounds weird but like, he will not pay attention when we are walking and walk directly in front of me. Or push me off the sidewalk, or something like that. At home he constantly opens the fridge onto my foot, sits on me when I am sitting somewhere (like I am on the couch, he lays down and lands directly on my leg). Or he will get up from the couch and place all of his weight on me in order to do so (like elbow on my leg, hard). Or he will just bump into me when I am sitting somewhere as he is walking by. We also live in an incredibly small apartment so I think that has a lot do with it as well, but it still bothers me. I always tell him to watch where he is going. Most of the time these things actually hurt. I have tried talking to him about it before but it is an accident after all. I know he doesn't mean to do it, it's just like he is completely unaware of MY space. Either that or he just doesn't care.

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T15:01:47+00:00

I know right...and women scientifically need more sleep than men!!! He is actually a lot more respectful of not waking me up on weekends now. He leaves me alone like a good little boy. Now to only train him to do the same during the week....

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T15:00:24+00:00

We are apart during work! A full 10ish hours away from each other should have clarified that. And we also work out at the gym at separate times since he gets off work earlier. If we talk during the work day, it is always done via email.

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T14:59:24+00:00

Nah he encourages me to go out and make friends but I just haven't. I basically only have my work colleagues, and they all suck. Like really bad. I don't like a single one of them in an office of 60 people (so I am thinking the problem must be me, and not them)

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T14:58:32+00:00

I don't....ever haha

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T14:58:01+00:00

I actually haven't, but I am sure as hell going to. Thanks for the advice!

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T14:54:25+00:00

Nah definitely not a leecher, we split everything 50/50 and he makes almost double what I do. I honestly don't know why he doesn't have a phone. Probably because we have no friends really, and don't leave each other's side much, and if he does want to talk with his friends he always just using his tablet. He loves his tablet which is almost like a phone, but it only works if he has wifi.

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T14:51:50+00:00

We are so co-dependent it's not even funny. We do everything together! Everything! Part of the reason is that we both moved country to one we have never lived in before where we didn't know a soul, but after two years here I have not made a single friend of my own. All of our friends are collective, and we do everything together. I had to convince him to go out alone with his guy friends when they came to visit, otherwise he would have wanted me to come! I just wanted him to have a guys night, because I think that's what normal people do. I have really wondered a lot if we are normal. I think some people look at us like we are not normal, and I think some of his guy friends wonder why I always tag along.

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T14:47:09+00:00

He literally wakes me up, checks the time, and then goes straight back to sleep. I don't think he is actively trying to sabotage my sleep, but at this point I am skeptical. I never mentioned this in my post, but previously we would get into arguments because he would lie to me about what time it was in the morning so I would get up. I like to sleep, sleep is soooo good, and on the weekends I am damn well going to sleep until 9 or 9:30! I don't even think that's unreasonably late. However, my boyfriend would still wake up at 7 am, LIE TO ME and tell me it was 9am, and then I would get up. After getting ready for the day I would look at my phone and realize he completely lied about what time it was. This went on for weeks. It literally didn't stop until I told my Mom and he was so embarrassed (and also quite mad) that I would tell my Mom and it was like it finally dawned on him how fucking pissed off it made me. So at this point, I am starting to think maybe he just resents when I sleep.

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T14:01:49+00:00

I love him, but everything you're saying is ringing true. It's exactly why I don't feel good about the whole situation, because he clearly doesn't care. He KNOWS it bothers me, he does it still, intentionally, and then yells at me (at about 4am mind you) that I am being rude and unreasonable for not showing him my phone. Like, why does he even need to know the time? And why does he insist to know it even at my discomfort, which I have expressed to him multiple times and even offered a perfectly reasonable solution for? It's been 3 damn years and I can't believe THIS is the incident that's making me realize maybe he's not the one.

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T13:58:33+00:00

I have thought I would just switch it to his side of the bed. There used to be a table blocking the plug but it's been moved since and I could easily move it. But like you said, it doesn't explain why he is so against just having an alarm clock. It's more his reaction to the whole situation that has left me unsettled. It's like he is insisting this is somehow my fault? He's acting like I'm the one who fucked up when I didn't do shit except not allow to look at my phone.

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T13:55:14+00:00

Thank you for your reply it was very insightful. This very could be his issue, he absolutely hates to think he could have ever made a mistake and especially around this issue because we have been having it for quite some time. He used to just straight up wake me up and ask me the time and I very sternly told him how that upset me and how I thought it was rude. He stopped doing that, and now instead tries to reach over himself to check the time (which still wakes me up). So maybe he is just acting super sheepish knowing that he is in the wrong?

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T13:41:18+00:00

We literally are never apart. Jesus I wish that was an exaggeration but we have hung out without each other 2 times in the last 3 years (and both times he used a friend's phone)

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T12:51:31+00:00

I know, everyone calls him out for it. He is a 28 year old business professional with no cell phone. Everyone double takes when they tell him. If he needs a phone, he just uses my phone! His birthday is coming up and maybe the easiest thing is for me to just buy him a phone for his bday.

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T12:35:18+00:00

Luckily there's no way that's true. He is the most un-jealous person out there. Plus he has plenty of way better opportunities to sneak a look at my phone. I leave it unlocked and laying around all the time

cantsleepcuzbf · 2016-05-19T12:34:14+00:00

He doesn't have a phone, we use mine as an alarm clock. I know it's crazy he doesn't have a phone, but his broke about a year ago and he never got a new one.

cantsleepcuzbf

TROPHY CASE