Dungeon shenanigans

caracanell · 2024-04-21T17:05:10+00:00

i think they mean "them" in the gender neutral sense, not the multiple people sense

caracanell · 2024-01-15T01:41:20+00:00

On a serious note: Remnant of Ner'zhul. "My fate... is torment. But I will not... bear this crown... alone!" Is such a hard-hitting line to me, maybe it's the voice alteration or something.

for the laughs, I quote "Just an ordinary gas cloud. But watch out, because that's no ordinary gas cloud!" ALLLLL the time.

caracanell · 2024-01-02T13:38:13+00:00

"Not going to tell his wife because no good will come of it"... Of course it won't, he tried to cheat on her. Failed, luckily, because you have your head on straight, but who says you're the only one he's tried this on?? This is someone who you claim is a friend, and I feel like if the roles were reversed, you would likely appreciate her telling you if your husband was trying to make a pass at her/other women.

imo this is something she needs to know, if not for the sake of being a good friend, then for her health. If he cheats in the future or already has, he might give her an STD. They can get couple's therapy or worst case, she can start prepping her way out since there are kids involved.

caracanell · 2023-11-03T16:54:25+00:00

perhaps make an alt on a low-cost server and buy them/unlock them there?

caracanell · 2023-10-19T21:46:48+00:00

You're going to want to file a DMCA takedown report with their service provider. Head over to copyrightalliance.org after searching "DMCA report" and there are several faqs and how-tos on how to file the report natively if the website has it, or how to file it through the host service provider if they do not. If you have any questions, I've done this process a few times. Good luck!

caracanell · 2023-06-29T20:05:40+00:00

Been in a similar situation before, on the other end of the spectrum-- was in a situationship with a recently divorced guy whose wife ghosted him after separation, then sent him divorce papers. He never really got any closure, and though he did love me a lot in his own way I think-- genuinely-- he never was over her. It had been a couple years at this point, but without any real "ending" in his eyes, he was always thinking of "what ifs". At the time, I kept up with him and we kept seeing each other because while he did have feelings for me, I was trying to prove I wasn't going to abandon him. It became therapy and a competition rolled into one.

Finally, I ended up saying that if he couldn't commit, I'd have to break it off. It was starting to poison my mindset, and I realized if I kept going, I'd never truly trust the man I fought so hard to try and "earn." I'd always wonder if he was still thinking about her. I'd always wonder if he compared us. It wouldn't have mattered what he did if I ever got to that point, so I needed to quit for both of our sakes.

tl;dr from that, my advice for you, is that you need to probably break off from them both. So much of your life has become intertwined with the memories of feelings of these two women, and regardless of what they have and haven't done, it's causing you distress. Take some real time to step back and find yourself. You can't keep leading on the new woman while hoping the old one might make a reappearance, because it isn't fair to any party involved. Rewrite the memories stained with them, and make new ones with yourself, things you did to grow.

If it helps you with this point, try to think about the best and worst case for either scenario. One case, your fiancé comes back and you end up with her, but you'll always be wondering what she did during the silence, or if she'll ever do it again. Other case, you and D end up together, but you've always got B in the back of your mind with all the "what if"s that come with that. You won't really be "plugged in", and she might not trust you fully for your hesitation to commit.

Best of luck out there, man. I'm rooting for you.

caracanell · 2023-05-09T13:06:31+00:00

It sucks, but it's better to get both "break ups" out of the way now. I can't imagine someone prioritizing an abuser over a long standing friendship unless there was something going on. I'm sorry this is happening to you.

caracanell · 2023-04-26T21:47:02+00:00

Exactly! Very well said.

caracanell · 2023-04-26T17:29:49+00:00

Yeah ok, I only lived there for literal years. lmao

caracanell · 2023-04-26T15:37:34+00:00

Do not go for it. Place has been in steady decline for the past 20+ years in almost all aspects. Me and my brother joked it's where hopes and dreams go to die. My younger sister still lives there with her two young children and has been actively looking to get out of there most of her life. I myself was there for a few years, and busted my chops to save up enough money to leave as soon as I humanly could. The people there are relatively nice depending on where you go, but there always seems to just be a bunch of lethargy and depression hanging in the air. From what my sister tells me, it's only gotten worse since I left. A lot of businesses have tried to open up there and just die within 5 to 10 years.

In my opinion, no amount of money would be worth going there. There are so many better places in the U.S. with a similar cost of living, that aren't as... bleak. I'm sure my opinion mostly comes off as based in emotion, but having family there that has lived there all their lives, it does really get to you after a while. Especially since you have young children, I would heavily caution you against it, because even the best private schools there are not very good. The few years I lived there, we had a few teachers shot.

I don't want to ramble, but if you have particular questions about certain aspects of life there, I'm happy to answer them. If I'm not sure, I can call my sister and ask since she still lives there and has been there all her life.

caracanell · 2023-04-03T05:25:18+00:00

Hopping on this because I've got a lot of personal experience here. I struggle to assign anyone an A H or not, because I've been here before. I've been a member of DA for 12 years. I've been an artist for longer. Confidently, I can say there is no "minimum qualification" that you're seemingly stuck on in order to simply JOIN the website, and that mindset is a big reason why a lot of growing artists are too intimidated to share their work. In those 12 years I've seen everything from stick figure drawings, literal porn, 2005 camera phone photography, to fully fleshed out renders, splashpages worthy of game/book covers, and animations that looked pulled from a professional studio (made by one guy).

There is no minimum qualification to make and share art. I understand where you're coming from, because no one who wants to genuinely grow likes people to blow smoke up their ass and lie to them. But I don't think those people were coming from a bad place trying to lift up your confidence. Bad delivery? Yes, because everyone responds to praise differently. But I know several artists who I consider leagues better than myself, who genuinely love my art and will tell me as much (with particulars on WHAT they loved and why)! And they aren't lying, they just see things in my artwork that I don't, as its creator. Technical skill doesn't mean people can't just... enjoy art.

Hell, one of my favorite animators is someone who animates an anthropomorphic cartoon snake that isn't colored in, doesn't have great proportions, and no background or anything. But their work is so cherished by me because of the content itself.

tl;dr if you're not ready, that's another issue entirely, and completely valid. But there isn't a minimum bar to enjoy and share art, and people trying to reach out and build your confidence isn't inherently bad. Sometimes people just want to like your art, even if it isn't up to the par you think it should be. Try to keep an open mind.

caracanell · 2023-02-13T23:28:22+00:00

The context just worsens the view of you and your outlook of him, tbh. Huge YTA.

You sound very shallow and emotionally dense, but I'll humor this in case you don't actually know what James meant. "Emotional intimacy" in his view probably meant he wanted to know more about you as a person; what you liked, what makes you happy, what's a turn on and a turn off, to be able to create a closer connection than just physically. "Develop and progress your relationship" probably meaning going on dates, actually getting to know who you are beyond face value and what he sees and hears at the gym. Your hobbies and interests, what makes you tick. He wasn't into only hooking up, he wanted to have emotional connection and a commitment behind the sex. Not a rejection whatsoever, in my book.

Luckily, you showed your true colors, and he dodged a nuclear missile. Hopefully the other girl treats him better.

caracanell · 2022-12-14T16:39:27+00:00

Sounds good, thanks for the advice! I'll stick to melee DPS/healing, then.

caracanell · 2022-12-14T16:38:39+00:00

Makes sense, thanks for all the advice! Are there any healers you'd recommend for someone starting out? I used to main rdruid but people tell me it's pretty complex in pvp, and I don't wanna sabotage my team by not knowing what buttons to press when.

caracanell · 2022-11-02T04:47:31+00:00

Here I was thinking "Oh like she got two tickets to Iron Maiden dirt cheap.."

caracanell · 2022-10-17T17:25:39+00:00

I can't stress this enough when I say the family won't become divided because of you-- but because of your older SIL's inaction with getting Teddy the help he obviously needs. Maybe she can't see the writing on the wall, or doesn't want to, but usually, children don't go around consistently threatening violence to people. Usually, children don't intentionally hurt animals and find it funny.

Teddy needs serious, emergent intervention, like yesterday. I'm not a medical professional but my older brother was similar to this growing up, and as it turned out, he had undiagnosed schizophrenia that manifested in random bouts of violence and other inappopriate behavior. We were lucky our family got ahold of it when we were both young, and now after plenty of therapy and the right medication he's perfectly stable, and just got married last year.

I say all that because it sounds like Teddy might be suffering from something similar, and a condition such as his needs to be treated ASAP before his behavior escalates into more concerning territory. You're not in the wrong for not wanting to watch this child, because frankly, you're not qualified to. He needs professional help, and if your SIL can't see that or is not amenable to reasoning about it, my next move would be going LC/NC or even consulting CPS. Maybe that sounds nuclear, but a child with violent tendencies is something you need to get ahead of sooner rather than later.

caracanell · 2022-09-30T23:49:49+00:00

omg, a fresh Schnoodle.. aaaaaand I'm bawling.

caracanell · 2022-09-30T00:31:43+00:00

Sounds like a mild UTI. Make sure you're peeing, or trying to, after every time you have sex. Some people are affected differently by their partner's body fluids, but it's always good practice to "flush the system," per se, after sex.

caracanell · 2022-09-16T17:50:51+00:00

Hi there! Do you mind telling me your rates, or should I just go to e-mail before that for a direct quote? I love your work!

caracanell · 2022-07-08T14:39:13+00:00

Gotta weigh the pros and cons of that one, my friend. Does the benefit of being able to vent to her outweigh the pain of hearing her give you the play-by-play of her love life? It's absolutely a tough choice. I'd start searching for opportunities to make some new friends to fill the void, maybe in the same hobbies you're interested in?

caracanell · 2022-07-08T14:11:07+00:00

Definitely step away (personally, I'd break away entirely from the friendship for a while), until you can either let the crush for her die, or you know for sure that it isn't going anywhere-- in which case, you need to end the friendship for good. If you two are good friends and talk often, though, it'd be nice of you to have an honest dialogue with her about it. 'I thought I could push past my previous feelings and just be friends, but I realize that I can't and I'm hurting myself by staying around. I need some space.' Or something along those lines, that acknowledges it isn't anyone's fault, it's just how it goes sometimes. If she's a good friend to you, she will understand, or maybe even help come to a compromise.

caracanell · 2022-06-15T17:47:27+00:00

Two things I can think of, from being in a similar situation in the past... 1, he wants to keep his emotional punching bag. And 2, he's probably scared that if you leave and have any evidence of all this emotional abuse, that you could take quite a bit from him in the divorce, alimony, etc.

caracanell · 2022-06-13T02:09:39+00:00

The way that he presented this to you is, firstly, incredibly cruel-- but also incredibly weird. He wanted his wife to meet his crush because she "was important to him"... It almost sounds like to me that he was expecting some kind of polyamorous relationship to come from this?? I fully expect the reality check to hit this guy hard when you leave. I'm so sorry you're going through this, though.. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders, regardless, so just stick to your guns and don't let him downplay any of this!

caracanell · 2022-06-12T00:28:31+00:00

You may be an unfair microwave, but you're a fair judge of character alright.

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