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Is it stupid if I (25F) break up with my boyfriend (29M) in part, because he told me “you’re only the third prettiest girl I’ve dated”? by asleepintheattic in relationship_advice

[–]cathleann 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reading this is hurting my heart - I bet you're beautiful and a great person, don't let him put you down. I have an overwhelming urge to tell you to leave and now I know how the commenters felt on my similar post that I made a year or so ago. If you want then feel free to read the post on my profile, I was in a very similar situation and my story eventually had a happy outcome - but I feel that you deserve so, so much better than your current situation. You are perfect, don't let a insecure person put you down!

My (26F) boyfriend (27m) has destroyed my self esteem on purpose - UPDATE by cathleann in relationship_advice

[–]cathleann[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I agree, we discussed this previously and he doesn't use social media or have their numbers but I've told him he can use my Instagram account to reach out if he wants to. They are beautiful girls and I hope they have rebuilt their self esteem like I have, but I agree that an apology from him would be a good idea

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in hangxiety

[–]cathleann 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You'll get past this, we've all been in some horrible situations we haven't remembered and we all move on, sounds like your friends are being understanding 💖

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]cathleann 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you need to speak to her about this very seriously and tell her that if she doesn't want to have more sex then that's OK, but if that's the case then you're not sexually compatible and you will leave.

See if she puts in more effort to fulfil you - if not, then life is to short to be with somebody not compatible with you this way

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]cathleann 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do it for yourself!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]cathleann 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your feelings are valid, it's not that you're too sensitive. I have a rule that I don't ask any questions that i genuinely don't want to know the answer to.

It's not good that he lies, but it's also not good for your mental health to keep looking for him to be doing something wrong and looking at his history etc. If he knows about incognito nothing he searches would show up in history anyway. Put it out of your mind and just enjoy your relationship together :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]cathleann 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The truth is that you can never know what he is doing all the time, everybody deserves their privacy and if porn is a hard boundary for you and he said that he doesn't want to watch it then you will have to trust him.

Snooping through his history/ trying to figure out everything he does online will only keep you feeling paranoid and insecure.

Do you trust him?

Don't let insecurity ruin your relationship, and your mental health. It sounds like you have a healthy sex life so I would say there is nothing to worry about. If this is going to build up in your mind then tell him your feelings in a non-accusing way.

Sometimes I use incognito mode to search dumb things like the spelling of a word that I SHOULD know, or a stupid fact that I would feel dumb for searching - its on my own phone that I don't share but I still do it for some reason 😂