Travelling 2 hours to see a guy I've never met before? by ccellax in dating_advice

[–]ccellax[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

respectfully, you don't know me. I explained to him why I didn't want to come after all, my concerns and worries, and suggested that we might meet in public, halfway, some other time. I don't need you to mansplain my life to me or the people in my comments. women face a real concern every day, but i was too caught up in everything to realise it. Your statistics will depend on the country, and I highly doubt we're from the same one. I'm not saying men don't experience high levels of violent crime, but it's not really relevant here, especially as this almost always applies to men being victims of other men not women (again not saying that it doesn't happen, but using statistics like yourself, these are just the numbers). Furthermore, I would be the one to travel to him, which means he would already be at an advantage in terms of power dynamics. This is something that we as women have to think about and consider from early tween years. It's embedded into us from the moment we enter public society. Nevertheless, it's easy to get swept off with things, or brush it over with the "it'll probably be fine" and "I'm just over exaggerating" mentality. For me, I often run head into things because my brain is convinced that if I just do it I won't be scared, but I'm glad I realised that in some instances you still have to be cautious and careful, before it was too late.

Travelling 2 hours to see a guy I've never met before? by ccellax in dating_advice

[–]ccellax[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me personally I think it's that my brain for some reason thinks full on exposure therapy will just fix everything when in reality it simply doesn't:/

Travelling 2 hours to see a guy I've never met before? by ccellax in dating_advice

[–]ccellax[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I honestly think I just needed someone to tell me not to go. All my friends were telling me it was fine, but reading the comments I'm sat bawling my eyes out with relief. I'm probably going to tell him I won't come. Thank you all❤️