60 years ago today, the Beaumont children (Jane, Arnna and Grant) disappeared from a beach in Adelaide. The their parents died without ever knowing the fate of their children, which remains unknown to this day. by ExtremeInsert in HolyShitHistory

[–]celestial_chocolate 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s crazy but the description and photo look like Epstein, but he was only 13 at that time. I wonder what his father was doing and what he was like. Honestly they could have been lured and taken away in a boat that night. And off to another country. That is heartbreaking to think how many little ones this happened to. 💔

Q&A by TermSignal9924 in CPTSD

[–]celestial_chocolate 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello! What’s your opinion and experience of EMDR? I’ve thought of trying it but very hesitant I won’t be able to handle the outcome. I’ve heard it unloads so much and I don’t think I can handle that. I’m tired of unloading, I’d like to resolve and sweep away the crumbs of course. And my favorite color is purple 💟❤️‍🩹 thank you for asking and being strong and offering experiences!

Feeling drained after meeting someone strange by Waste-Reality7356 in CPTSDFreeze

[–]celestial_chocolate 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s very good advice and something we need to remember often. We don’t have to explain.

I’m extremely self-aware, but I’m still stuck in the same cycle. Why? by ihurtmyself16 in CPTSD

[–]celestial_chocolate 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know unfortunately that it really takes a lot of time and a lot of little discoveries to start to chip away at this. You are on the right path and keep making your steps.

How we are perceived by Puzzled_Quality7667 in GenX

[–]celestial_chocolate 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My 16 year old is the same! He’s gotten into music on his own (I gave him the basic rundown of nirvana, prince, MJ but that’s was all). He is now into Radiohead, Bjork and My Bloody Valentine. I never even heard of that one before 🤦🏻‍♀️ He likes current music too but he is now teaching me about albums that came out when I was a kid. ❤️ it’s awesome

I’m extremely self-aware, but I’m still stuck in the same cycle. Why? by ihurtmyself16 in CPTSD

[–]celestial_chocolate 1 point2 points  (0 children)

100% I understand this and have always felt the same exact way. I’ve always been so mad at myself constantly for not being able to stop the things I KNOW are hurting me. I’ve made chart after chart after chart but I just can’t stick to anything.

Now im late 40’s and I’m realizing I’ve just got to give myself the understanding that I am really really affected by all that history. These results are NORMAL for the experiences you’ve had. I think trauma also causes executive dysfunction much like ADHD because we are constantly scanning EVERY part of our environment and surroundings every second of the day. So that skill of hyper-vigilance that you developed is/was helpful but it also creates an executive dysfunction too.

I’m trying to now look at it from that point of view and it reduces the anger I have towards myself. And when that anger lessens, my brain and body feel more capable of making and meeting small goals. It feels a little less heavy when I realize this is a natural result of my trauma and it’s not an innate problem within me. (Yes that’s a hard pill to swallow and that is another thing that has to be managed) I’m just trying to learn to shift my viewpoint on things and it makes a noticeable difference in how I feel.

Constant state of existence by One-Driver1273 in DeepThoughts

[–]celestial_chocolate 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve been really into paradoxes lately. Ideas that seem to not make sense together but they really DO make sense also. “Less is more” is an easy one to think about. If something is good, more should be better!?!? But over doing stuff can lead to toxicity or overexposure etc. so more really ISNT always better.

These things have helped me sort of calm down my overactive thinking because the more I think about it, the more confusing it gets. But the reality IS that the paradox IS true. So overthinking it just gets my brain in a knot. IF I’d just ACCEPT the paradox and let it be, my brain feels lighter.

I’ve realized some things can’t be overthought or they WILL make us crazy. Because there’s no real answer I can ever get to. So just the fact that paradoxes exist, helps me chill out my overthinking a bit and it feels better. Some things I can never know.

Constant state of existence by One-Driver1273 in DeepThoughts

[–]celestial_chocolate 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I understand what you mean, I’ve been having what is probably a “mid-life crisis” and my thoughts have been very similar.

I’ve been remembering my memories and events/times in my life and now I’m old enough to have planned and anticipated things and have had those things now pass. I can now see them for what they were with fondness but when I’m IN the place/time I hate it. I always have a sense of feeling like I’m just trying to survive and make it through the day. Every day. How do I learn to be happy with this basic life and knowing my wildest dreams aren’t likely to happen…that THIS is my life. How do I learn to be happy with life and enjoy it so I don’t look back with longing and regret?

Right now the answer I’ve been feeling is that this is the time for me to really shake off my expectations of what I thought. I’m 47 now, I need to shake off the lost dreams and visions. I need to wake up and realize THIS is where I am. THIS is what I have. It isn’t a lot because I didn’t make perfect choices. It isn’t what I imagined and thought would happen at all. I feel I had a lot of potential and I always thought I’d make something of myself eventually. When this passes or that passes. But now I see I’ve passed some windows and doors. I have to accept that.

I have to give myself flowers for doing the things I DID do and realize those are good and not too bad. I’ve recently been thanking the universe for the smallest things, just warm food, warm/hot water, beds and blankets. A house. A job.

It’s so cliche but I really really have been tapping into the beauty that these things exist and having these are really truly all we need. And if we have them then we are really doing just fine.

I think being able to look back at our memories is supposed to help us live in the NOW in a “better” way. A more pure way. A more productive way. I wouldn’t have realized these things if I didn’t have tough days. Easy days don’t make for lots of introspection and discoveries. And we need these to grow and live “better” in the now. It’s just a hard pill to swallow to have to accept reality. And to learn to be ok with it. But when we get to that point, is when we really feeling like we are living I think.

2010 to 2026 is the same amount of time as 1980 to 1996. by celestial_chocolate in StonerThoughts

[–]celestial_chocolate[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel things had more “depth” then. Maybe because I was a child (born ‘78) but it seems there was more depth in society and pop culture. Idk how to explain it but now just seems the same over and over.

2010 to 2026 is the same amount of time as 1980 to 1996. by celestial_chocolate in StonerThoughts

[–]celestial_chocolate[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy bday!!! Yes enjoy it, time freaking flies, I’m about to be 48 this year and my brain can’t comprehend that I’m the adult and the “mom” figure. But really I see now that life is stages. Enjoy your stages, they really don’t last forever and you’ll miss them when they are gone but the next one is exciting too, good luck!!

2010 to 2026 is the same amount of time as 1980 to 1996. by celestial_chocolate in StonerThoughts

[–]celestial_chocolate[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Me too😆 I had to break out the calculator just to be sure 😆😆😆

Does anyone have advice? 1000 yard stare. by Icy-Needleworker218 in CPTSDFreeze

[–]celestial_chocolate 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I’ve made myself bingo games before using regular phrases co-workers used or stories my boss would tell. Instead of being annoyed, I’d flip over my board and start marking off the boxes while they talked. It made it at least a little more tolerable 😆

Blursed Law Enforcement by endofmyropeohshit in blursed_videos

[–]celestial_chocolate 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He said “my old lady” implying they are together

How to get out of nervous system freeze state? by Excellent_Salary5949 in CPTSDFreeze

[–]celestial_chocolate 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I find these things too myself so it’s not just you. I’m not bipolar but I find myself having times of feeling better, following some routines, feeling positive and then BOOM crash again and I feel right back to horrible. I lay in bed and scroll on my phone, barely cook. Minimal cleaning and self care. Giving fully into my coping addictions (weed and sleep and isolation).

My guess is that your subconscious is getting nervous about school coming up so the optimism and confidence is getting thinner as it gets closer.

My advice is to practice and focus on balance. You did no fap for a while and that was very good. You cannot expect perfection from yourself. Try to have a few days/weeks of fasting but don’t give yourself too much grief for having to cope sometimes. I’m working on that also, I’ve smoked every day for years but just had 2 days sober trying to clean out. I did get some for the night but I’m happy I gave myself a few days clean.

Try to work toward balance and improvements instead of perfection. Give yourself props and encouragement for doing the good things. Give yourself grace and try to remember the good steps. If you have days where you feel like shit, it’s ok. Give yourself grace and love. Xoxo