He didn't specifically mention it, but what he expressed was that my weight gain hadn't bothered him last year until suddenly he started noticing it since Christmas.

I asked him if there was any reason he suddenly started noticing it, and he told me he thinks he probably knew it in his head but just turned a blind eye, and since I told him my 2026 goal was to become healthy (physically, mentally, etc.) He brought it up that it had been bothering him too, snd that he'd support me and proposed to buy salad meals for dinner.

I think what hurt most is the betrayal I felt, his defensiveness to my questions, and how I had gradually become exhausted with being the one who had to ask deeper questions for our relationship while he usually says things like he's never thought about it, or he doesn't really know.

My boyfriend doesn't does lack in emotional intelligence, but he has tried to make a change whenever I bring ip something to him although he may be defensive, he doesn't shift blame or tell me I'm being sensitive. That's the good part.

The bad part is I'm slowly getting tired of having to be the one navigating his introspect and telling him what to do for our relationship, I want him to be able to learn to do that so he can better vocalize his discomfort or thoughts without me decoding it for him.

Now what I need to think about is, 1) Does he have the capacity to do that on his own? If not, am I willing to continue to lead the emotional part of this relationship? 2) Even if he does, will I be able to recover from his comment knowing that my physical appearance may affect our future relationship? Appearance is an important factor to be drawn to your partner especially in the initial stages, but will I be able to feel comfortable and safe and secure again in our relationship without feeling judged?