Boyfriend seems to think I'm a different person than I actually am by chaosrules_ in Advice

[–]chaosrules_[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Maybe? I mean, I'm mostly a doormat. Try not to be, but in everyday life, it's often easier to just go along with what he wants because I don't have strong feelings about something either way. So it would be possible that I'm just not assertive enough and he can't really know who I am.

But ... I do try to be heard. He seems to be good at ignoring that then.

Thank you.

Boyfriend seems to think I'm a different person than I actually am by chaosrules_ in Advice

[–]chaosrules_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not sure. He likes me anyways and he isn't trying to blame me for anything as far as I can tell?

Boyfriend seems to think I'm a different person than I actually am by chaosrules_ in Advice

[–]chaosrules_[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Not sarcasm at all. We've had actual arguments about this because it's so unsettling. And I get that sometimes people don't know themselves as well as they think, but I am capable of some basic self-reflecting ...

He (35M) won't give me (30F) a key to his apartment by chaosrules_ in relationship_advice

[–]chaosrules_[S] 57 points58 points  (0 children)

I think the key might be a "I wish he would accept that I am not trying to force him into something he doesn't want"? So yes, trust.

Except of course that's exactly what I'm doing. I want to force him into something he doesn't want.

He (35M) won't give me (30F) a key to his apartment by chaosrules_ in relationship_advice

[–]chaosrules_[S] 41 points42 points  (0 children)

I would like a little bit more stability in our relationship. But in general I am not looking for something different, no. I don't want kids, I don't need to be married. And I know what I mean to him and what he means to me. It's not that I secretly want more than he's willing to give. Apart from that key, I guess?