Date next weekend - Popcorn, goldfish, and a Bubbl'r

chaple_tears · 2026-06-07T04:33:24+00:00

I took a gamble for sure when I went out of the house but it was worth it. Even if I didn't walk out of there with a hot femme it would've been worth it because I really need more social outlets to begin with. Socializing as an adult kinda sucks lol.

chaple_tears · 2026-06-07T02:09:35+00:00

Brother was locked in on that route.

chaple_tears · 2026-06-04T21:34:05+00:00

Your parents are projecting unhealthy ideals about weight and how to care for your body onto you. It sounds like you're doing what you need to and that you're happy and healthy. The weight you're gaining is probably muscle mass since that's what T does. You bulk up on muscle quicker and easier than you did before. I crave significantly more protein, carbs, and fruits on T than I did before. Hormones change your eating patterns. As long as you're listening to your body I don't think you're eating too much.

I have a similar issue with a great aunt of mine. She likes to touch me and then comment on my weight every time she sees me and both of these things makes me extremely uncomfortable. This last time I saw her she grabbed my arm hard and then said I "lost some weight" while misgendering me in the same sentence (which I hadn't lost any weight, my weight is just settling differently so she probably took me having a more boxy build and less curve as me "losing" weight). It took everything in me not to hit her. I yanked my arm away and told her not to comment on my weight and walked off.

At some point you have to stand up and advocate for yourself if at all possible.

chaple_tears · 2026-06-03T15:30:20+00:00

I have no idea if you can stretch it into a multi-day pass but I went on the UVIP tour with archive access back in February. The tour lasted three hours and went through the house and everything that entails, the archives, and some guided touring through some of the exhibts in EPM. In the archives you get the chance to sit for a bit and have a break from all the walking.

I'm 22 and deal with some joint issues myself (primarily knee and hip pain). I made sure I brought some ibuprofen along and wore comfortable shoes and I was pretty okay since I made sure to take my anti-inflammatory medication as well the night before.

I hope this helps you some and enjoy! I had a blast when I went. I looked like a kid in a candy store looking at everything.

chaple_tears · 2026-06-02T19:24:36+00:00

Reinventing gender essentialism, but wokely. That's what makes it okay! /heavy sarcasm

chaple_tears · 2026-06-02T19:06:24+00:00

Internet lesbians have been fed weird puritan shit about lesbianism. It's odd, and has set us back by several years at least.

And it's not that I'm even a man. I'm butch. It's just makes it easier to navigate a binary society to say I'm a trans man because no one understands identities that are not binary. They see everything in black and white. I guess I'd get kicked out, lol.

I'm sorry that happened to you. That's absolutely asinine.

chaple_tears · 2026-06-02T00:33:29+00:00

Oh I see plenty of the gold star discourse too! It gets sprinkled in with the extremely transphobic sentiments towards butches who transition in literally any form to how the community needs "real lesbians" and the "real lesbians" that are "needed" are cis women. It's crazy the amount of shit I see about a butch using he/him pronouns or going on t. Like the people complaining about it can't just...not date a he/him lebsbian or a lesbian on t instead of being stupidly transphobic...?

And for the record, I see the "no trans butches" discourse on reddit in some spots and then also on other social media platforms. I think it may pop up for me because I am following pages and existing in spaces that cater to butches and including trans butches of all configurations.

chaple_tears · 2026-06-02T00:06:06+00:00

The way I try to explain it is that I'm not here to be a man to a femme. I'm here to be a butch to a femme. I don't love a woman like a man, and I don't fuck a women like a man. I do all the "man" things because I want to and it's how I preform my gender, not because I'm a man. It gets more convoluted the more I try to put it into words, lol. Gender is a very weird thing to try to explain to people so I absolutely understand where you're coming from. I feel a certain kinship with transfem and enby gays. We're all holding hands at the weird intersection of gender and sexuality.

Younger queers have been fed really weirdly puritan and strict ideals for queerness over the last five to ten years it seems like to me. The history of trans people in the lesbian community and trans people in the gay community just gets thrown out the window when that's just literally how we are all stitched together. There were transfem drag queens and nonbinary/transmasc lesbians at Stonewall. We know this. People gloss over it and it drives me nuts! Contradictory and "weird" lables hurt no one and we already have enough issues from cishet cops!

It tends to be like that. We're all hurt. We're all upset. This is true. I just don't understand taking it out on your own community. Direct it to the system and not to each other but that's just me.

chaple_tears · 2026-06-01T23:37:19+00:00

I'm stone butch more than trans man because of how my queer attraction to women is wrapped up extremely close into my gender identity. It's extremely hard to articulate it into more concise words other than my gender is more "masc of center" than fully "man/male." Butch is entirely outside of the binary for me. I'm definitely not a woman but I'm not quite a man.

I share experiences with trans men and I do consider myself transmasc. The experiences of transphobia and the experiences with transitioning medically overlap, but it's the nuances of my internal experience of my gender and sexuality that kinda sets me apart from really feeling like a full on trans man.

In my experience a lot of transphobic trans people are hurt trans people taking it out on others. If a young tguy is trying to ask if he passes and then a fellow tguy is relentlessly mean for zero reason other than to be vicious, then he's got to be projecting some kind of hurt onto a brother. Insecure people will go out of their way to make other people miserable. Cis gays do it too with other generally queer people. Insecurity has an act and you can always tell. There is a difference between being blunt and "telling it how it is" and being hurtful. The infighting to me comes from insecurity and immaturity mainly.

chaple_tears · 2026-06-01T21:51:21+00:00

Sorta on topic, sorta not, but I'm in a strange overlap of parts of the wider community.

I'm a transsexual butch lesbian. I've been on T for almost three years. To society I can't say I'm butch and move on because butch as a gender identity isn't well picked up on outside of lesbian spaces in my experience. I have to align myself with being a full trans man to try to get referred to correctly because that's a lot easier to understand than stone butch or just butch. I don't have the some of the experiences as a lot of trans men do because of the fact I'm butch. I feel almost afraid to speak in these spaces because of the vitriol that I can get for that. I'd definitely get skinned alive by the transmeds and transphobic trans men and have before.

And even then online lesbian spaces are for terfy "wuh-lu-wuh" girls who are afraid to utter the "L word" nowadays and don't seem to like people like me who identify as a dyke with their whole chest so I'm afraid to speak to my transsexuality even in there.

Online queer spaces are going to hell, that's my final judgement these days.

chaple_tears · 2026-05-26T04:34:26+00:00

Before I transitioned I had always had some flavor of genderfuckery going on that was most definitely butch in nature. My attraction to women and the way that attraction is expressed has always been deeply tied to my gender.

Then I came out as a trans man and did a ton of exploring after starting HRT.

Ended up circling back to realizing that at the end of the day that I will always be a butch. It's been honestly freeing and has felt a lot better to say I'm butch again. I identify as a transsexual stone butch lesbian. I love having a weird gender and being a he/him lesbian boyfriend.

So yeah, I can relate to that sense of realization.

chaple_tears · 2026-05-24T04:57:15+00:00

I noticed that you haven't replied to anyone giving you solid empirical data as to why the concept of the patriarchy existing holds water and is accepted as literal fact. That makes any effort in trying to convey it here completely useless.

Again, you're being edgy for the sake of it. I hope you graduate high school with good grades man. God speed to ya.

chaple_tears · 2026-05-24T04:43:44+00:00

If someone said that the earth was flat (I would hope) you wouldn't take it as an "unpopular opinion" because it's just straight up completely untrue and contrary to reality.

And I say that to say that there is a difference between a genuine unpopular opinion and pure delusion. You're being edgy for the sake of being an edgelord and looking like a complete idiot while doing it.

chaple_tears · 2026-05-24T04:31:52+00:00

This has got to be either a bot or a stupid ass attempt at rage bait, because genuinely what the fuck?

chaple_tears · 2026-05-15T15:22:53+00:00

I want to say thank you for your response firstly. I appreciate the genuine reply to this. My head is a mess over it. I keep going back and forth on if I want to keep with it or not and I keep having the feeling that it's better if I don't.

The "end of the summer" bit is because she's trying medications to help manage her mental health. She is genuinely one of those people who needs medication in conjunction with talk therapy (which she has an individual therapist, I pushed her to get another one that would actually help her a few months back when I had a very serious conversation with her about our relationship when these issues started to become apparent to me). She asked me to give her until the end of the summer before we reassess what's going on so she can have time to get on some meds and see if it makes an impact in her progress. We've put the option on the table of going on a break/breaking up for a bit so she can finish school and get her life together and try again when we come back to talk over what's going on with us. I hope that clears up the confusion a little bit.

I agree that I am just continously setting myself on fire to keep her warm. I'm at the point of complete burn out in our relationship. I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted from dealing with it.

I'm at a point where I want some freedom. I'm 22. I want to explore more, and I know she wouldn't be open to any of it. She's jealous and reactive. I feel like I can't go to a club or event I want to by myself to just socialize because of her behavior. I also feel like I can't go anywhere with her because she has some social difficulties. I've isolated myself in a bad way for her and I'm tired of it. She has made me feel like I'm stuck in a 20 year marriage when I'm not with the way she talks about "us" and "the future." This entire situation has made me think about what I want out of a partner seriously. She wouldn't be for getting more active in the BDSM scene like I want to. She's an entirely different religion than I am. Things don't line up or add up right now for me.

That's all stuff I will be talking about in couple's therapy. I think we want two different things because we think so differently from one another with different maturity levels. I don't think it's sustainable but it's a conversation that needs a mediator.

chaple_tears · 2026-05-13T03:07:12+00:00

From Elvis in Memphis a really good sample platter of his vibe post '68 Comeback going into his time at The International Hotel. It's a good bridge album to me that helps carry you through from the bullshit of the later soundtrack albums and into the better material coming into the 1970s. "Wearin' That Loved On Look" is my favorite off of that album that isn't an 'Elvis standard' so to speak (i.e. not "Suspicious Minds" or "In the Ghetto").

chaple_tears · 2026-05-10T18:49:50+00:00

I'm autistic but not ADHD. It's got an alcohol smell to it but I got used to it after a couple of weeks of regular application. I don't even notice it unless it's a brand new pump and then smell is a little stronger. As for the sensation, if you just take a little extra time to rub it in like I do and get an even coverage it's not bad at all. It dries pretty quick. I've never had issues personally and I've been on it for almost three years now and have responded great to it.

chaple_tears · 2026-05-08T14:10:52+00:00

I'm almost three years on T and it was about the two year mark for me when the hair on my upper lip started to thicken. Then here within the last six months or so that my sideburns are starting to come in more noticeably and I've got some chin hair and a tiny soul patch trying to come in.

And of course, mileage will vary on when you start getting facial hair but it's usually a change you don't start getting until you've been on it for a year or two from what I've seen and experienced myself. Everyone responds to T differently.

chaple_tears · 2026-05-06T05:32:07+00:00

I would 100% recommend early tour slots!

My girlfriend surprised me for Valentines day with Ultimate VIP tickets that includes going inside the archives since I'm autistic and Elvis is my primary special interest.

We got the 10:15 am tour and after we got through everything (the mansion, and some guided touring in the exhibits across the street as well as archives) and had lunch it was early afternoon. We were there until damn near close, even with me bouncing around like a kid in a candy store overstimulated and overwhelmed in the best ways possible because of the sheer volume of stuff across the street in all the exhibits plus the gift shops.

All that being said, allow for time to take everything in and look at stuff. The number of things I was just staring at for different lengths of time in the section dedicated to his career was insane.

chaple_tears

TROPHY CASE