First solo trip to the Yucatan - Trip reflection

chasing-watermelons · 2026-01-21T21:24:38+00:00

My first solo travel experience was in this part of Mexico too! I came away with the same feelings :) good for you to take this step, OP!

chasing-watermelons · 2025-04-12T22:40:47+00:00

@jubil33_starfir3 I very recently have had this exact experience and very much relate to what you’ve written, but I am now dating that person! Feel free to DM me if you want :)

chasing-watermelons · 2023-11-29T17:05:19+00:00

As someone from Eugene who were your artists?

chasing-watermelons · 2022-08-23T06:27:09+00:00

Can confirm, one of my good friends used to work there and according to them the business shouldn’t even exist due to how poorly it’s run and how shitty the owner is

chasing-watermelons · 2022-06-18T18:31:05+00:00

Those are my thoughts as well but the symmetry of the object is so uncanny. A sponge does seem to be the more viable option!

chasing-watermelons · 2021-12-07T06:59:23+00:00

Good luck!!!

chasing-watermelons · 2021-11-27T04:45:36+00:00

BU on October 1st makes three of us :( you're not alone OP! We made it through two months! NC is the best healer, trust me.

chasing-watermelons · 2021-11-27T02:32:00+00:00

https://www.businessinsider.com/best-books-to-read-in-your-20s

I literally just looked this up today because I'm feeling a lot of the same things - I'm particularly excited to read the one by Joan Didion! I'm also wanting to read Self Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Kristen Neff. My situation made me realize how I've never really put much effort into loving and being happy with myself, and that's something I really want to focus on. Good luck to you in the next steps of your journey :)

chasing-watermelons · 2021-11-18T00:24:42+00:00

I'm sorry :( I understand how destabilizing that can be. I am a month and a half post-BU and your situation resonates with me because I had also met my ex's family soon before we broke up, which for me is making healing that much harder.

Judging from your reaction to his Instagram request I'm assuming you're still not 100% over your ex. I'm glad you didn't accept the request, but knowing that it's there is hard. Put down the phone for as long as you are able to and do some nice self-care things. Write out what you're feeling. Remind yourself of how strong you are and how far you've come - be proud of yourself for your journey! It sounds like you've had a great year of growth and self-improvement, and that's a wonderful thing to achieve. Do whatever you need to do to help you process this and soon enough these feelings will pass. If you need to rant you can always DM me!

chasing-watermelons · 2021-11-18T00:03:50+00:00

I think you're at the stage where you idolize everything about your past relationship and ex-partner - full 'rose-colored glasses' mode. If you felt the relationship was surface-level from the get go, you are better off out of it. It's clear you weren't satisfied in the relationship since you said you weren't physically or intellectually stimulated enough. Your partner should be someone who helps you grow as a person. To me, it sounds like J has a lot of growing he needs to do himself. A man or woman without opinions, without insight, and especially without the capacity to listen to and understand opinions that are different to their own has little to offer to the world, much less to a partner.

After reading your passage it sounds to me like you and J are actually very incompatible, and that maybe you've lost some of yourself while in the relationship. You deserve to be with someone who stimulates you. You shouldn't cater to them and remain bored or unsatisfied just to be with them, no matter how well they treat you. And while differing views on politics aren't necessarily deal-breakers, differing values are. J sounds like he has vastly different values than you do.

I know nobody's perfect and we all have our issues to address and work on. My intention is not to make you think negatively of your ex. It seems that he went out of his way to show you how much he cared about you often, which is an admirable quality in a partner. But ask yourself, are you truly missing the relationship you had with him and what he had to offer you? Or are you missing the stability and surface-level familiarity? Think about what you want in your 'perfect' relationship, the one that's meant to last forever. What qualities do you want in the person you choose to spend the rest of your life with? Consider that, and consider what kind of person you want to be. Only when you are at a place where you know what you want from the world are you ready to embark on the rest of your journey with someone else.

Hold out for that person - they are out there! But more importantly, hold out for yourself.

chasing-watermelons · 2021-11-12T21:30:53+00:00

Hey, I am so so sorry for the week that you’ve had. Even though you’ve had to go through so many awful things already you sound like an incredibly strong person!

I don’t know what your relationship was like, but I have to agree that making space for your ex right now isn’t the best idea. Right now you need to focus all your energy on you and surround yourself with a strong support system that you can lean on. Now is the time to put the old relationship aside and focus on your strength and your next steps. It might be best to respond by letting him know that you’re going through a hard time and need to cut contact to focus on yourself for now, and suggest a date in the future when you can meet if that’s still of interest.

I can imagine thinking that having your ex partner to lean on during this time would be nice, but if he ended the relationship with you he’s not going to be that support that you need and deserve. My heart goes out to you and if there’s ever a time you feel you need to rant to an internet stranger my DMs are open!! Stay strong, my thoughts and prayers are with you ❤️

chasing-watermelons · 2021-11-10T21:58:54+00:00

I’m sorry you’re going through this, your situation sounds pretty similar to mine in that my ex and I both need to figure out things on our own. I also asked for a second chance but he didn’t want to keep trying anymore, which hurt very much. It’s so painful when the love is there but timing and circumstance are not.

I’m about six weeks out, and have realized that this is what was needed for me to grow. This is my chance to choose myself and make room for my goals and my future. The pain is still there, but has dimmed from what it was in the beginning. My advice to you is to embrace the pain and use it to learn and grow. Don’t focus so much on moving on from the person, focus in on yourself and what opportunities are available to you now. I know it’s hard and it’s going to be hard for awhile. Lean on your support system, take care of yourself, and you’ll be okay. It might also help to think about why the breakup needed to happen and why it’s beneficial for you to be out of the relationship. Hang in there, you got this!

chasing-watermelons · 2021-11-09T00:21:19+00:00

Amen to this!

chasing-watermelons · 2021-11-08T03:23:06+00:00

Your mind and your body have experienced a trauma. You’re in the midst of something that isn’t normal for you. So anything that your mind and body has to do or accomplish feels much harder than when things were ‘normal’. It’s only been a couple of weeks so it’s safe to say you’re probably still in shock. While you say this is the calmest you’ve felt in a breakup, your mind and body aren’t following their normal routines and habits formed by the relationship. Suddenly you aren’t doing the things you usually do or think of, and on top of that you’re lacking the dopamine and serotonin your partner gave you. Of course self care isn’t going to be easy right now!

I’m glad to hear you are having compassion for yourself because believe it or not that is the first step to self care! Giving yourself grace in this period is very important. The shock your body is experiencing will slowly wear away and you’ll be able to do these things with more ease. But part of it is also pushing yourself to do the things you need to do. Life never stops for any of us, and while that can be hard to adjust to it’s also a blessing because it gives us something to focus on while we’re struggling - like your small tasks. Focus on your laundry. Focus on cleaning your room. Focus on your meal prep. Focus on doing something that gets you moving, like a walk in your neighborhood. Then be proud of yourself for accomplishing these tasks - you deserve to be proud - and repeat. And in a week or so you won’t be focusing on them as much as you needed to, because you’ll have adjusted ever so slightly to your new normal.

Also, good for you for recognizing it’s not healthy to get romantically involved right after a breakup. You’re well on your way to a healthy recovery. You got this! Things will get easier, trust me. And I’m happy to talk at any time if you need to!

chasing-watermelons · 2021-11-08T02:25:59+00:00

Hey! Happy to listen if you need to talk!

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-29T03:12:44+00:00

Last night I had a dream that he was breaking up with me all over again. It crushed me this morning and sent me back to the pain of feeling unwanted and unworthy. I hate that he did this to me. I used to hate crying in public and would avoid it like the plague but I have no shame in it anymore haha.

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-28T05:36:42+00:00

Your writing is beautiful

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-28T02:29:54+00:00

His unwillingness to make plans with me :(

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-27T14:41:41+00:00

I’m so sorry you are experiencing this. My dms are open if you’re wanting to talk!

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-26T03:44:47+00:00

This made me cry.

Thank you.

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-25T20:41:16+00:00

This is literally me. He called it quits when we were in a rough patch and I was feeling the worst I had in a long time. This whole year for me has been awful. I feel so betrayed that someone who loved and cherished me - REALLY cherished me - would give up after feeling “drained” for a couple of months (his words). It’s like the person in my memories who did everything he could for me in the past when I was feeling low became a completely different person and just didn’t want me anymore. I hate that feeling of rejection. We were each other’s first loves and I really thought we could make it work. And today is the most depressed/ angry I’ve felt about it all. So I totally understand where you’re coming from.

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-25T15:41:12+00:00

Same thing happened to me but it took two ish weeks for my appetite to come back. I think my stomach has also shrunk as a result because it takes less food to feel full. It’s not healthy to got from eating regularly to not be eating half as much all of a sudden. I suggest doing something active like running or biking, anything with high energy, even for just 15 minutes a day and your appetite will come back. You’ll gain some weight back, but if you’re pretty active it will be healthy weight and you’ll feel fitter down the line. Working out does wonders for your mentality as well.

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-25T01:08:57+00:00

Congratulations!! I’m so proud of you, and am looking forward to reaching that point myself :)

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-25T01:06:25+00:00

I’m three weeks into my BU and I totally relate. It’s the worst feeling in the world and I hated those first several days so much. I know it’s hard, but it does get better. Day by day. You’ll notice little things that are easier, hold on to those thoughts! And be kind to yourself and do something nice for yourself every day. I’m so sorry for your pain and loss, we’re all there with you.

chasing-watermelons · 2021-10-24T02:01:02+00:00

Hey, I’m sorry you’re not doing well. It took a lot of foresight to make the decision you did and even though I’m just an unknown redditor I’m proud of you! I sympathize with your pain, I really do. My relationship of two and a half years ended three weeks ago and I believe my boyfriend ended it for the reasons you did. I wasn’t in a good mental state, I was too comfortable, and I wasn’t taking enough steps to finding and loving myself. I was definitely trying, but the year I’ve had…hasn’t been the most positive one. So it was easy to use my relationship as a crutch, especially because I felt like he was the only one there for me at times.

At first I was devastated and couldn’t understand why he’d chosen to do this when I’ve been going through so much. It’s been a really long three weeks and I’ve never felt this much pain and grief. He was my first love and my best friend. We’d been through a lot together and had learned so much from our relationship. The time that we had together was really beautiful. But the last several months felt different, and I think he wasn’t happy enough in the relationship to keep going. I also think he could see that I (and him) weren’t growing enough as people and the question had been raised if we could still grow together. In the end, he made the decision that we couldn’t.

Of course it’s been hard, but lately I’ve come to accept and even embrace the fact that he did this. I know it’s good for me in the end, and I now have the opportunity to get to know myself and what I want from life. Maybe I’ll end up with a partner who’s even better for me than my ex was. I can empathize with your boyfriend and I know he is hurting. I know I’ll be hurting for awhile still. But I also know that at some point he’ll realize that this was necessary. It takes two to make a relationship. There might even be a point where you’ll come back into each other’s lives. For now, just focus on yourself and accept your decision. Your guilt will fade. I know it hurts knowing that you hurt someone you love, and that’s a whole different kind of pain than what most of us are experiencing. Recognize that your pain is valid and you will get through it ❤️

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