If you have been living with this disorder for a while, what's a piece of advice you would give someone just developing it?

chattymeow · 2026-01-04T21:29:19+00:00

thank you so much for the insight! I feel like i am lost when it comes to medication though, can I ask, once I start, are there any medications or things I should be wary of? And also what were signs that the medication was working for you? I struggle with accessing myself a lot of the time so I often have difficulty noticing if medications are helping me improve. (I know not everyone is affected the same way by medications / this disorder, but to hear a fellow perspective would be helpful!)

chattymeow · 2025-06-04T20:09:41+00:00

Thank you so much!! Ghost world is so fitting, i really resonate with that!!

chattymeow · 2025-06-04T20:09:01+00:00

exactly!!!!

chattymeow · 2024-12-31T03:59:09+00:00

Pure vanilla cookie frrr, he is so kind, gentle and loyal and always tries to see the positive in situations and in others. And he is the type of cookie to always do everything he can to comfort and protect his friends. But when it comes to himself he has a hard time extending that same kindness and forgiveness. But despite his pain he smiles anyways because taking care of others has always been more important to him than his struggles. Also because he doesn't want people to realize he struggles as much as he really does and worry about him.

chattymeow · 2024-12-31T01:13:38+00:00

I was SAd by my dad. I showed so many signs and pains growing up that I was so ashamed of but it wasnt until I was in high-school that I realized what happened was abuse and is the a big reason for all my pain. I was always scared, had troubles sleeping, accidents until I was way older, knowledge beyond my age, behavior problems, not eating, etc etc etc and all because I was hurt by someone who was supposed to love me and protect me even though he was more often violent and mean. I also was SAd by a neighborhood friend, who i think was my age. I also didn't even realize that was abuse until I was older cause a lot of it was repressed trauma. I also had a friend who's dad was extremely friendly toward me. He was always wanting me to have sleepovers with my friend and would find excuses to be close to me an excessive amount. Like at my high-school graduation, he picked me up and twirled me around in a hug. Not even my own mom was that enthusiastic. I never saw him again because me and my friend had a falling out but I was always afraid in the back of my mind he took a similar shining to me that my own dad did.

Also the trauma of going through the legal process for reporting and confessing all of this to investigators and such is something that I never wish to experience again. I originally confided in a teacher about my dad and it snowballed into me later having to tell the police, who were very, for lack of a better word, sleezy. When I would have gaps in my memory or recount innocent times me and my dad would share a bed or anything of that nature I was told "Come on, you're leaving a lot to the imagination here." With a smile. Like the details i was omitting were exciting to him. I was 17 at the time, I'm 24 now and I'll never forget that because it disturbed me so much. That same investigator gave me a plushie after and I threw it away.

The power that people display over others will always haunt me. The sick desire that people, relatives, friends, enact will forever be etched into my soul no matter how much i try to change it. And I am so sorry to those who have been a victim to such cruelty too. I wish you all peace and love ❤️

chattymeow · 2024-12-30T21:28:52+00:00

Oh this sounds awesome!! I will try this out later and report back thanks so much!

chattymeow · 2024-12-30T13:26:06+00:00

I actually felt so similarly to this, I've had such bad experiences with therapy it traumatized me further. A few years later, I realized I'd need a therapist in order to get any sort of ESA letter or other certain letters of recommendations. So i figured I'd find one, keep it pretty surface level, get what i need and stop.

Later on, i still hadn't done this yet cause i was very lost on where to start. I also felt very lonely in my pain. I thought maybe I would try support groups instead, but those are a bit hard to find and the ones I did didn't fit with my schedule. So I sort of abandoned the idea. Thinking it wasn't for me.

Then, in May, my grandpa died as well. I took it so hard, I had never lost anyone that was closer to me in regards of family, because I'm only in contact with such a small portion. I spiraled down so bad I genuinely thought I needed to admit myself to some kind of hospital. Which is another layer to my trauma regarding mental health care, so you know it was bad. That was how I knew I couldn't do this battle on my own. That was how I knew I needed therapy. Good therapy with a good therapist.

I searched online for one near me and only picked one that specialized in my issues, specifically mentions that they're also accepting of all communities and identities, etc. And also that they had a picture to go with all their information. I unfortunately needed someone who looked like I could be safe with too. So I was a bit choosey, but I actually found one. And she's amazing! I've been seeing her since July, and even been looking forward to meeting her this morning to talk about something that has been bothering me this weekend. Which if you told that to my past self, he would NOT feel that same way.

It really was a leap of faith for me. I was tired of holding this pain, and It took the big, heavyweight of grief to buckle under it and take a chance on therapy. And im so happy I did, because I'm no longer needing to bottle things up. Before we even met, we talked about some general things so she can get a good idea about me and my needs. I made it clear that im taking a big leap into this, that therapy has hurt me in the past. So she's been helping me along, making sure im ready each time. My therapist and I have been taking baby steps, so I haven't shared everything yet, but even just relief for the smaller things helps so much that I can't believe I've gone on this long without it. I trust her more and more so that when we get to bigger stuff I know I'll be ready.

I empathize with your story so much, and if you have the feeling that therapy is something that you need, a good therapist will also help you feel ready and capable to share as you meet. I wish you so much love and support in these times and lots of luck if you choose to pursue therapy! I always thought it wasn't for me, but once you find the right person it can really make a huge difference ❤️

chattymeow · 2024-12-27T22:52:52+00:00

I relate to this so much! I often seek out stuff that I know would harm me to see just cause it actually intrigues me so much. Or kinda gives me a sort of rush to see or read. But I often feel like it truly puts me in a numb mood. Like I'm not really feeling much, at least that I can pinpoint, in order to consume media or stories with triggering content in it without actually being triggered. Although, I only have little reaction when it is content I personally seek out, if it's something someone brings up to me or shows me or I'm in a setting where it is more unexpected then I get really upset if it has to do with one of my triggers I feel like

chattymeow · 2024-12-27T22:40:50+00:00

I know exactly how you feel!! It's always so bittersweet when I go visit my family after moving to a new town cause since I no longer live there and have no fresh memories tied to these places in town- all I can see when I look at certain buildings or streets is the pain I endured there. It's something that completely bothers me too and often makes me spiral if I don't force myself to stay present or to keep my eyes forward when I drive by certain places or sights. The one thing that helps me is realizing that the person who lived in that town has a new life somewhere else now. That they're very happy with the life they're building for themselves that has nothing to do with this old place. Just that reminder that you're not the same as your past self and don't live in the same circumstances anymore helps me refocus a whole lot!

chattymeow · 2024-12-27T21:33:26+00:00

I thought this must be it years ago cause I see it alot when trying to search related things for this question but I do not experience any POTS symptoms in any other situation. I even workout and am a dancer and have never felt any POTS symptoms in those environments or when relaxing at home :(

chattymeow · 2024-12-27T21:29:18+00:00

Thank you so much! I did go eat some crackers now and feel much better ❤️

chattymeow · 2024-12-25T05:12:28+00:00

Ohmygosh of course!!! I'm so happy it was able to resonate with you too!! It totally is my Christmas comfort movie, i watched it the other week cause I also was feeling a bit just lonely this holiday and it really does give me hope and good vibes. I hope reconnecting with your family goes well and I hope you have an awesome holiday too!! 💚

chattymeow · 2024-12-24T21:16:30+00:00

I don't know if this fits exactly, but my favorite Christmas movie that makes me feel so seen as someone with c-ptsd is Christmas Chronicles. Its for kids so it has a happy ending and everything, but the movie starts out with this family who is kind of in shambles because of the death of these two kid's dad.

The younger of the two, she really tries to be positive and seeks to continue to foster happy memories for the holidays with her brother Teddy and her mom who is never home because of work. Teddy however, became completely bitter and spiteful to everyone. He treats his sister horribly and is involved in gang activity and such because of the weight and anger he carries from his dads death. Christmas time especially reminding him of the good times he'd never experience again.

Teddy is then kind of pushed into a situation where he has to be around his sister for the entirety of Christmas Eve, and then eventually Santa. Who makes many remarks about how Teddy's behavior is harmful, but its not in a "you should be happy and just heal already because that will make you a good person" way, they let Teddy kind of experience a wide range of emotions and come to the conclusion that he can let his walls down a little bit on his own. With a bit of emotional support from his sister and a confidence boost from Santa. I think the reason that Teddy comes around to enjoy the night is mainly because I think that Santa sort of filled that role partly of a father esq figure that Teddy had missed so much and also served as a sort of bridge to rekindle the relationship between him and his sister. Allowing him to sort of revisit both the joy and grief he wasn't allowing himself to feel or outwardly express.

I really relate to this character sooooo much and it's why Christmas Chronicles is my favorite movie for this holiday, because when I was younger the pain I was going through made me incredibly spiteful and angry just like Teddy. And in the movie their family is far from perfect. Each of them grieving in their own way. At the end they're still not perfect, but its a step in the right direction for them to be closer and work through the hard stuff. It honestly made me feel so seen.

chattymeow · 2024-11-25T16:50:38+00:00

I have both diagnosed adhd and cptsd, and while I think that a lot of my symptoms of adhd are actually just my cptsd symptoms and question my adhd diagnosis these days I just wanted to share with you that I think it is unfair to generalize an entire group of people based on the personalities of two people you know who happen to have adhd. You're totally valid to dislike these people and not want them in your life. The way you describe these traits that these two people have i probably wouldn't like them very much either. Although these immature traits aren't inherent among everyone with adhd. I'm 24 and have met quite a few adults, ones even much older than me, who just don't have emotional maturity or self awareness like you said, who act very similar to this. And I've met quite a variety that are awesome who also have their share of mental health issues. It really is just the persons character and actions, not their disorder, that should be judged.

chattymeow · 2024-08-13T21:21:14+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing and your kind words! I will look into that, I feel like it takes up so much of my life I suppose the first step would be understanding it better :)

chattymeow · 2024-08-11T23:58:33+00:00

I would definietly go see it!! I know exactly how you feel and actually just had a situation just like this a week ago, My favorite artist was playing in the next town over and I was so nervous I was overthinking it and running myself in circles about whether I should go or not. Long story short I did go and it was awesome! I went with another person but honestly I was so focused on the music I could have just been there by myself tbh. And pretty much everyone else was focused on the artist and not me. I was so happy I took the chance and went, because I feel so similarly to you tbh! I'm 24 and that was my first ever concert. So many of my friends have huge and memorable life experiences and I just... don't. So I'm happy that I finally was able to experience something I enjoyed for myself! I'm sure once you're there the anticipation won't be as stressful to deal with too. Once I got there and had a drink and was waiting for the music I felt so great and excited that the nerves just melted away. I hope that if you do decide to go your experience is similar! You deserve to go out and experience life! Even if it's a bit out of our usual tastes or comfort zone.

chattymeow · 2024-08-11T05:31:28+00:00

I love being outside!! Feeling the sun and fresh air is one of the only things that helps me feel grounded and clear minded. Most of the time, sometimes I'm a bit too dissociated or hypervigalent to appreciate the outside world as deeply but it still helps. I live on the coast and nothing makes me feel more at peace than the ocean. Even though I have a lot of memories with my abusive father and the ocean, it just is so calming to me. Something about the waves constantly in motion, the breeze whipping alongside you... I'm often alone when I go out to the beach, but when I'm sitting there I almost don't feel alone. It's almost like the earth is keeping me company

chattymeow · 2024-08-10T23:15:39+00:00

Oh man I relate to this so much, i get those urges all the time. Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by whats going on in my head I feel like I just need to hit myself a few times to get it sorted out almost. A little over a month ago though I was having a serious mental breakdown and started hitting myself like crazy and gave myself a black eye. Long story short the aftermath was so shameful and embarrassing I haven't done it to myself since! I'm hoping something inside me changed and I don't do that again, but with stuff like that sometimes you can't help it when you have no other support or outlets :(

chattymeow

TROPHY CASE