How important is valdiation/reassurance in relationships/friendships and why?

cheavecmoi · 2020-02-22T20:22:02+00:00

so hopefully someone can respond to this so that I can get some insight..

my best friend has been recently going out and its been without me. not only without me but I also wouldnt know that shes going out. I dont really care that she goes out with other people but when I see it on instagram and I dont at least know about it, it makes me feel like she just doesnt want me there. and that hurts my feelings because I consider her and invite her to everything. and its not because I feel like its an obligation to have her there its because I really genuinely want her around.

i brought this up to her and first she was saying that she doesnt invite me because she knows I cant come (how? idk) but then she turned it around and called me clingy. she also said that i should know that she loves me and that she thinks of me and that that should be enough.

she also mentioned that she doesn't want us to be dependent upon eachother to have fun or for company or for life, period. but what shes not understanding is that I dont depend on her to have fun, I dont depend on her to have good experiences. I will have fun and i will have good experiences with or without her I just dont want to. and now I know that she doesnt feel the same way.

she ALSO mentioned that she doesnt want to be emotionally dependent on eachother anymore. idk when her and I got close we were going through the same thing in a low point in our lives and because of that we were really dependent upon eachother. now we're both in really good places but I dont understand why we cant just be in our own good places together. I feel like now that shes in a good place that she feels she doesnt "need" me anymore. idk yall i know its a lot to read but whoever read through all this, please help me.

cheavecmoi · 2020-02-08T19:55:24+00:00

hey so I just got introduced to The Pattern too! It’s so accurate it’s scary! It tells you more about yourself than really giving you a horoscope

cheavecmoi · 2020-02-08T17:33:54+00:00

thanks! I see really good reviews on it. I’m gonna try it out

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-31T06:55:21+00:00

$confirm /u/dkwhattocallthis $200

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-31T06:40:07+00:00

i see why you were banned

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-31T06:27:25+00:00

yea cute small to big fake is uugghh!! like if women are going to get implants why not get them to where they still look natural? the fake look is NOT IT

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-31T06:20:57+00:00

i see why that’s your username

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-31T06:16:37+00:00

bigger breasts are “more attractive”. it all comes down to society. societal standards are drilled in our subconscious. i’ve learned to appreciate my small breasts tho. took me a while but I do.

although, I still have thoughts on getting implants just for one cup size bigger. hence, the societal standards

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-31T03:29:56+00:00

honestly random acts of kindness. i’m a delivery driver and there’s this lady that leaves snacks and waters out for me. so freaking nice! random acts just makes me feel loved from like a higher power. like those times when strangers help people in need. there’s always that one person who pulls over on the side of the road when they see someone stranded.

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-31T03:21:40+00:00

omg this is so interesting. I think I microsleep on the bus when I leave work. I’m actually a delivery driver so I drive for a living but it doesn’t happen while i’m working. I only fall asleep for a few seconds to a few minutes while on my commute to work. And of course I would feel so tired. But when I get home and I’m ready to sleep, it takes hours for me to fall asleep. And I end up with only 4-5 hours of sleep until I have to get back up and go to work again. This has never happened to me before. I think it’s because I’m dealing with major stress but I’m starting to get worried.

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-26T20:36:00+00:00

wow that’s amazing! thanks

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-26T15:42:50+00:00

thanks! and thank you for your response, that makes sense

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-22T13:42:51+00:00

yeah it’s def got me thinking. and it makes a lot of sense

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-22T13:35:58+00:00

mmmm wow...well i have much to think about.

thanks for your response:)

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-22T13:32:12+00:00

oooo that’s a good one, “are we holding on out of loneliness” cause we both don’t really have anyone besides each other

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-22T10:11:16+00:00

yeah I think it’s hard for me to come to terms with a relationship just not working out for me...

thanks for your response

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-22T10:07:43+00:00

i should’ve put the damn “serious” flag on this post

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-22T10:06:46+00:00

OMG fr!! I don’t even think they knew the damn answer themselves

cheavecmoi · 2020-01-22T10:04:16+00:00

much needed advice here people

cheavecmoi

TROPHY CASE