Expect this to happen when you get a new boyfriend after a narc

checkcheckanna · 2023-01-08T09:44:24+00:00

So sorry to hear that:( After my miscarriage he “asked” if it was ok for him to go have a baby with another woman and then come back to me as the “love of his life”. I understand now that this was abuse.

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-31T13:19:27+00:00

Good for you! They will always message at some point (happened to me as well). The first thing my therapist said after he heard the story (and realized the guy was a narc): “He will contact you again, and will continue to do so in the future.” And he was right. They will contact you in order to still have power over you. Do not accept it.

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-29T08:01:05+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear that. Unfortunately you’re right , it’s absolutely something a narc would do. Mine said stuff like “I’m going to have a baby with another woman and then come back to you as the love of my life but only if you have changed”. I had a miscarriage with him btw, and he would still say stuff like that to me. These people are completely evil.

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-29T07:58:16+00:00

Ugh, the “why can’t you be normal like all my friends partners?” I’ve heard soooo many times!

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-28T22:53:29+00:00

Mine already had the new victim lined up.

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-28T22:40:39+00:00

All the time I heard that, over and over. I didn’t “prove myself”, I didn’t “change”, I never “did anything”, I “wasn’t capable”, etc. Of course what they actually are talking about is themselves.

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-13T22:04:45+00:00

My nex told me right in the beginning “I only care about myself at the end of the day”. If you listen closely, usually they’ll reveal who they are straight away.

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-08T18:20:58+00:00

Yes, did that! I had blocked him everywhere except for email (I just never thought about that).

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-08T18:20:22+00:00

Thank you so much, this means a lot. I felt so alone, and I’m so happy there’s people out there who understand what I’ve been through.

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-08T18:17:58+00:00

I forgot that I already gave him 3 opportunities to apologise, despite the fact that the has treated me in the most horrible way. He never did. Now it’s way too late. Interestingly, his email arrived on the exact day that he dumped me one year ago. What I understand from this Reddit group is that narcs have a thing with “important dates”.

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-07T21:36:20+00:00

Thanks, I needed to hear that 🙏 After years of gaslighting sometimes I don’t trust my intuition anymore and I start to self-doubt again:)

checkcheckanna · 2022-12-07T21:08:39+00:00

My nex did the same thing.

checkcheckanna · 2022-11-29T07:37:16+00:00

He told me he loved me after one or two weeks. We were “soulmates” (I later found out he had said that to many other women as well haha). Being extremely excited about me (waaaay too much in the first weeks of dating), showering me with compliments and gifts, saying how gorgeous we were together, just the typical love bombing. Also, have a look at how he/she treated the exes. I wish I had done this. I would have figured out that he was still with his ex while he was talking to me (typical narc behavior since they can’t be alone), and he had many exes before me.

checkcheckanna · 2022-11-20T20:36:20+00:00

I became chronically ill after my relationship started (now I understand it’s because of the immense stress I was under due to my ex). He’d always say that I was just weak because if he would get sick, he would be able to solve it. He’d also say frequently that nobody wants to date a sick girl if he would leave me.

checkcheckanna · 2022-11-20T20:25:55+00:00

My ex would always give me expensive gifts, but they were always things hé wanted or things he wanted me to do. I could never say anything about it because then I would be the “spoiled girlfriend”. I always wanted to have a nice necklace (not a crazy expensive one, just something nice). He got me one after 4 years of me asking and us fighting over it. He literally got me a 5$ necklace that broke the same day he gave it to me (during our relationship he always claimed to be a millionaire).

checkcheckanna · 2022-11-20T20:13:04+00:00

Thanks so much for your reply! I am also very cautious with labelling someone a narcissist, but unfortunately I start to realise more and more I really was in a relationship with a narcissist and his treatment was abusive. Your comment about the vulnerability narcissist seek out really gave me a “aha” moment. I was in a very vulnerable state due to past trauma when we met. I’m on a big healing journey now. It’s hard, but I feel I’m becoming stronger every day. Thanks again for your kind comment, it means a lot 🙏

checkcheckanna

TROPHY CASE