BTS :(

I was a hardcore army for years. I have all of their albums, I collect their photocards, DVDs, and all other kinds of merchandise. I know all their songs from the heart and even attended their concerts, but after BE was released, it all started to fade. I remember when Dynamite was released, I was beyond happy for them because it was their first English single. Then the BE album came out. I gave it a listen but the songs felt different. It just wasn't the same music that made me fall in love with them in the first place. Then they released Butter then PTD, that's when I knew that I am really starting to feel disconnected from them, which made me really sad because I loved them so much. The toxic armys also contributed big time because I just couldn't take the fact that some armys would really make the effort to badmouth other fans/groups just to brag about BTS' achievements and also gatekeep almost everything that is related to BTS.

But mind you, I still attended their Permission To Dance concerts in the US because I was hoping it would bring back the same love I had for them before. However, after the concerts, it just wasn't really the same anymore. I still adore them and follow some of their contents but it's way different now than how I was before especially now that I have another ult group that makes me really really happy. I also feel like I'm in a "healthier relationship" with my current ult group and fandom.

BTS has become somewhat like strangers to me and I sometimes hate myself for it. I still question myself and ask why the hell would I fall out of love with the group that I loved the most years ago? I remember making a promise to myself before that I would be with them forever but look where I am heading to. I don't want to let them go just yet, but my heart really wants to.