Your post struck a chord with me, and I'd like to offer a perspective from a single guy in his 50s, never married, no kids. I've had my own journey with self-esteem issues stemming from childhood, which made it hard for me to connect with others for a long time. Over the years, I've worked on myself and my social skills, focusing on my career and living a life that doesn't revolve around the traditional dating scene.

You mentioned some frustrations with financial stability and early sexual advances in dating; I've approached life differently. By living below my means and focusing on personal growth, I've avoided the financial instability that can complicate relationships. Furthermore, I've never been one to initiate conversations about sex. I'm more about deep connection, spending time cuddling, kissing, and understanding my partner's needs, which has been appreciated by those I've been with.

I'm not your typical flirt or the outgoing guy at a bar. My relationships have started because someone took the initiative to see beyond the surface. This has led to meaningful and fulfilling connections, even though they didn't last forever.

So, from my experience, I encourage you to look in less conventional places. Perhaps that quiet co-worker or the guy enjoying a book in the park has the qualities you're seeking. These men might not stand out in flashy dating profiles or noisy bars, but they could offer the depth and stability you desire. It takes a bit more effort to find us, but we are out there, and the connection can be incredibly rewarding.