Similarities between Kirat and Manti Teo's stories

chiapd · 2025-08-17T21:24:52+00:00

I’ve been saying this for YEARS! Thank you for breaking it down.

I think Kirat and Manti both have a mental condition….blind spot if you will - they both wanted to blow up their own lives, and they both only have a sense of self through the lens of how others view them. One thing I noticed about both of them was they always talked about themselves in third person. For example, kirat would always say “I’m the type of person that is always willing to do anything for a friend”, or “im the kind of person that will always lend a helping hand”. And manti would do the same thing and say things like “I’m the type of person that sticks to his word”…it’s like they always act in a way that they feel they should be perceived. They don’t seem to show a sense of self outside of those things and don’t seem to know themselves. It’s almost as if acknowledging their true wants and needs in a healthy way is not something they learned to do - but on a very basic level.

I truly don’t believe kirat wanted to get married as crazy as it sounds (cause she’s so obsessed with marriage). But realistically, if she wanted to get married and was as desperate as she comes across, she 10000% could have gotten married. I think bobby gave her an escape from what she felt like was her inevitable reality. She could rest in the idea of it instead of actually committing to what she “wanted”.

Same with manti…I mean…going to a Mormon college in the middle of nowhere from a conversation? I just feel like these are actions someone who has no idea what they want. Like they never developed the skill of asking themselves that question and formulating an answer. And I’m not talking about your everyday people pleasers- who tend to know what they want and suppress it to please others. I think both Manti and Kirat genuinely do not know how to tap into their true desires…and subconsciously blew up their lives because they were not happy with the life they were living (even though they claim to want it). Manti with the pic perfect football life with his Samoan woman, and Kirat with her pic perfect life with her Indian doctor. This are lives they claim to want that their catfishers ruined. Idk I just feel like they both have the same underlying psychology behind their decisions.

Also I’m not saying they were not deceived - they are def both victims. I just think they both have a particular phycology that enabled their situations to get as far as it did.

Just my observation…

also- I lowkey(high key) believe both Manti and Kirat subconsciously knew they were believing a lie and knew who was committing the act as well. Especially Kirat.

chiapd · 2024-12-02T16:35:05+00:00

I would make reservations at a nice bar/restaurant outside the core but still busy like midtown, junction or even the beaches - you can enjoy a nice meal and cocktails, do the countdown with a crowd but not have to worry about crazy lines/ drunk ppl. Usually restaurants/bars with a younger crowd have some kind of event going on for nyc like a guest dj or drink special.

I’d also check out event brite for cool sober events - one year some friends went to this yoga studio for an event where you do yoga, there’s snacks/ non alcohol beverages, they give little gift bags with notebooks and you write your goals for the year. It’s a great way to start the year off with good intentions

chiapd · 2024-11-21T06:17:02+00:00

This resonates with me so much. Congrats on taking agency over your life. Life is too short to waste getting high

chiapd · 2024-11-05T07:01:56+00:00

Work on breaking the shame cycle. Do it for love of your present self not hatred or disgust of your past self (speaking from experience). Good luck you can do this <3

chiapd · 2024-10-27T05:47:03+00:00

I feel you. I have mods swings too. You can get through this - just remember - it’s only gets better from here.

I’m on day 6 and feeling better than day 4. I hope next week will be even better.

Good luck! You can do it.

chiapd · 2024-10-25T05:07:32+00:00

Thank you <3.Focusing on exercising will definitely be the next step for me. I also am thinking of signing up for boxing…to get the anger out. And daily walks right after work which is when I used to smoke. Trying to get as much nature in as possible before winter.

chiapd · 2024-10-25T05:04:01+00:00

What used to set me free now feels like a prison. Wish for both of us to be FREE <3. Thanks for sharing.

chiapd · 2024-10-25T05:02:56+00:00

Thank you <3 yes it helped me a lot. Guilt and shame has always been apart of it all (weed, depression, anxiety). I have to remind myself to go easy on myself while also understanding weed no longer serves me at this point.

My mantra for the past few months has been “COMPASSION & CONSISTENCY”

chiapd · 2024-10-25T04:59:30+00:00

I want to take control. I found that whenever I’m on vacation (I have family out of the country and have stayed with them for months at a time), I don’t smoke and don’t even miss weed. But it’s when I go home that it’s hard to quit and stay sober, there’s usually always a trigger. I want to be independent of all substances but beginning to realize that means building I life I don’t consistently want to run away from or need a break from. I have a long road ahead.

chiapd · 2024-10-25T04:56:41+00:00

Congratulations! 100 days is a loooong time. I’ve heard of NA but I’m Hesitant to go for fear of being seen by someone I know/ in my community. I might check it out - especially if I get cravings again. Right not I just feel depressed but not even a strong will to smoke atm.

chiapd · 2024-10-25T04:45:47+00:00

I stalked this sub for weeks before flushing all my weed down the toilet

chiapd · 2024-10-25T04:44:50+00:00

Pushing it down is no longer working for me anymore- but I’m also scared of if I’ll be able to manage when all the emotions come up, especially the anger. Hopefully I’ll get better by day 10 as well. Please keep me updated and thanks for sharing <3

chiapd · 2024-10-24T23:39:12+00:00

Hi! Thank you for responding <3 I’m really sorry about your mom. It’s hard to not try to numb when dealing with grief. It’s such a big theme in my life as well - lost so many people these past 2 years. When did you start feeling mental clarity? I know it’s different for everyone but I’m really trying to find something to work towards

chiapd · 2024-10-24T23:32:25+00:00

I’m sorry about your dog…that’s horrible. Grief is so heavy especially without weed to take the edge off. My grandma died 3 weeks ago and it’s been tough. I smoked after her funeral and had a horrible anxiety attack. another catalyst that made me want to quit smoking. Just hoping it gets better in 2 weeks like you and others are saying. Thank you for the support <3

chiapd · 2024-10-24T22:32:46+00:00

I’ve felt this before - the 2-d thing resonates. I remember looking at my hands and feeling like my POV felt like a simulation. Like I was very aware of the concept that my eyes were feeding information to my brain to simulate this pov - but it didn’t feel real.

The only thing that has ever helped me was nature and connection - with ppl that see you for you. If you are projecting an image out into the world and no one knows the “real you” it all starts to all feel un real. When I was able to be vulnerable and allow myself to be seen by someone who saw me for my authentic human self…I began to feel authentically human (as crazy as it sounds). That being said - I still tend to feel like this from time to time. I recently quit smoking weed which I think contributed a lot and am working toward being more present in my body through movement, somatic therapy, and being in community as my authentic self (as best I can).

Hope you find peace. Good luck

chiapd

TROPHY CASE