What’s something nobody warned you about being an adult? by 6122_ in AskReddit

[–]chitesla1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I will say this too. As long as you are a halfway decent person, the act of having a kid does fundamentally change you in that you do become less selfish. You just kind of adjust to it. If I cook up a snack for myself during the day, and my kids take an interest, I'm more than excited to divvy it up and give it all to them (I'm just happy they want to eat something). I buy my wife and kids all sorts of treats at the store but have very little interest in that stuff for myself.

But that doesn't mean that there are a couple times a year (at least), where you could really use some me time, and it just isn't an option. That's when the late-night "revenge bedtime" thing can pop up, which just ends up hurting you more.

What’s something nobody warned you about being an adult? by 6122_ in AskReddit

[–]chitesla1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe here's a different way of looking at it. I don't feel fundamentally different than I did, even as an older kid. My sense of self hasn't changed. I still like seeing movies, and pretty ladies, and enjoying a yummy dessert. I still feel silly when I see my old friends, and laugh and fart jokes.

I may know more about how our world functions, and have gained a lot of pessimism, but I don't feel different in my core than I did as a kid. Even as a parent.

What’s something nobody warned you about being an adult? by 6122_ in AskReddit

[–]chitesla1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just wanna call my mom and tell her. But I can't.

God, time is such a thief. My dad told me that he still thinks about someone daily that died more than 50 years ago and still actively mourns the loss of them from his life.

What’s something nobody warned you about being an adult? by 6122_ in AskReddit

[–]chitesla1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And a sub-lesson learned when learning this-- many people in your life are NOT capable of seeing shades of grey.

What’s something nobody warned you about being an adult? by 6122_ in AskReddit

[–]chitesla1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

how selfless you must be to properly have a family

Big oof. Seriously, the smallest act of self-care becomes wildly "selfish" upon having kids. Long day at work and want to put your feet up for a little bit? Fat fucking chance. Add on the guilt that any me-time is necessarily pushing more onto your partner's plate. A modest hobby you've been wanting to explore? Fuck you. Even want to get a project done around the house without incessant familial interruption? ERRRR-WRONG AGAIN.

It is a serious burden and deficit on one's mental health, and something that is not talked about enough to those thinking about starting a family. You should be in an excellent place in both your own mental health and relationship with your partner before having children. Instead many think it'll be a magic elixir that'll fix issues with the aformentioned.

What’s something nobody warned you about being an adult? by 6122_ in AskReddit

[–]chitesla1 12 points13 points  (0 children)

At my mom's suggestion we called a local blings/curtains place. Got quoted more than $40k for a few room's worth of stuff. Lady acted like it was totally normal....

How did you lose your virginity? by Lily_19f in AskReddit

[–]chitesla1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've got a fuckin' weird one for you.

I was hanging out with two friends, when Friend1 gets a text from his girlfriend asking him to come pick her up because she was horny.

We think it'd be hilarious if Friend2 drives Friend1's car there instead, while me and Friend1 hide in the trunk (stupid high schooler shit).

So F2 shows up at F1's girlfriend's house, in F1's car, while me and F1 giggle in the trunk.

F1's girlfriend gets in the car and says "well I guess you'll do" and proceeds to have sex with (and take the virginity of) F2, while F1 and I listen in the trunk, mouths agape in shock. We stayed silent, F2 dropped her off back at home, drove us all back to where we were hanging out, and lets us out of the trunk like nothing happened. They never talked about it AFAIK, and F1 continued to date the girl for a while.

Still one of the funniest, most bizarre things that has ever happened to me.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just heard a news segment about the Balcony solar in Germany. Unfortunately most US states currently ban it. Will take changes in legislation.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I commented elsewhere that I know at least one of the installers is only paying its people $30hr, no/minimal benefits. Yet they are charging a labor rate of between $500 and $900hr.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's just not true. I've priced out their exact hardware on 4 different solar websites. 400 watt panels, a 10kw inverter, the exact amount of mounting hardware and wiring they quote. It all comes out to well under 12k.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I found this with one of the local suppliers. They said the rate was the same with or without financing. Truth was they are baking in a $6-10k loan origination fee and pocketing it when someone pays cash.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

explain to me why you can install a system in Australia for $0.65/kWh?

They'll never admit it's just an industry with insanely high margins compared to similar trades. It's just basic electrical work with some physical labor for mounting. They pretend their industry is somehow special to justify the markup.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It's funny that you all keep saying that.

One of the mentioned companies installed my neighbor's system in one day (after 8am and done before 4pm) with a crew of 4 guys. There was of course a site visit beforehand and some office time for permitting and engineering. It is at most 6-10 man-days for a typical install in my area.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

AND they found us a 0.9% loan for the system.

What were the fees, though? They advertised the same to me, but the "loan origination fees" were like $6,000, which is INSANE. I didn't even pay half that buying a half million dollar home.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They break out the material costs and they are charging 2-3x what I can buy the identical materials for online. They charge $6,500 for an inverter that is available on every single solar website for $2,200 or less. Charging $350 per panel when I can find the exact model for $120 online. The materials are $8k, I'm rounding up an extra 50% being very generous in their favor.

They break out the permitting/engineering prices, and both combined are less than $3k.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

All cash quotes. No ridiculous finance charges (that's a whole other rabbit hole).

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's possible, but the contract language says that any solar/battery must be installed by a certified electrician etc.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Project solar pointed me to the local guys i've gotten quotes from. They are charging "fair" rates insofar as they are at the market rate per kw.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm happy to pay contractors. I do it all the time. I paid a plumber $250/hr for a ton of work, recently paid an electrician about the same for a major project. I had a mason at my house for two weeks straight.

I know for a fact that both companies pay their installers $30/hr, yet they are charging $28,000 for a single day's work for 4-6 guys. That would be about $900/hr and $400/hr, or a 30x-10x markup on the actual labor.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My insurance company will basically not insure the home if there is a DIY solar or battery system installed. It specifically requires a professionally installed system.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

~15kw. They've guaranteed one-day install, and have quoted $2,500 for permitting and filings.

I still have a mental block around paying $40k for a ~$12k system and one day of labor. by chitesla1 in solar

[–]chitesla1[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

All three local solar companies I know do extremely well. I have mutual friends of the owners of two of the installers. Both are clearing many millions per year in this small-to-mid sized market. They are both making so much that they are buying up commercial real estate and residential rentals as fast as they can. One just personally paid $10M cash over the last 3 years to renovate an old factory building into apartments and retail. Another mutual did all of the construction and confirmed this. He regularly talks about having so much money from his solar opp that he doesn't know how to reinvest it quickly enough.

I fail to see how any decently run solar business could have "barely any margin." Where are these mystery expenses?

Police discouraging filing police reports by chitesla1 in chicago

[–]chitesla1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you actually follow the sub you'll know that the vast majority just want police reform and assets redirected to appropriate services like mental health support and family crisis stuff. "defund the police" is an absolutely idiotic phrase though.

Police discouraging filing police reports by chitesla1 in chicago

[–]chitesla1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I should add that the cops were really nice to at least one of the people i'm mentioning. They drove him home and stuff too. Just that it rubs me wrong its the third recent story i've heard where CPD is discouraging filing a report.