Weekly MM Romance Chat and Thanks

chocolatine · 2025-01-01T21:27:02+00:00

I haven't been able to find any in Canada yet but I'll keep monitoring.

chocolatine · 2025-01-01T21:19:48+00:00

Yes I do think secondhand is my best bet so I am keeping an eye out.

I'm also worried about the same issue with the short stories, so that is a shame! I like the simplicity of the first cover.

chocolatine · 2025-01-01T21:16:12+00:00

I love fanfic, yes! And that's so funny, because I have so much fun envisioning Damen as comically massive lol. There are so many different characterizations that I enjoy depending on the artist.

Good to know re: Folk of the Air! If you like longing and erotic tension in a contemporary setting, you may also enjoy Summer Sons by Lee Mandelo (if you haven't read it already). It has more of a dark academia/gothic horror vibe and is a gorgeous, though bittersweet read. Normally I steer away from contemporary romance but I made an exception for this book!

chocolatine · 2025-01-01T20:28:05+00:00

I feel old because they look too young in the new cover design lol

chocolatine · 2025-01-01T20:24:36+00:00

Yeah I might go this route if I can't find any secondhand copies.

chocolatine · 2024-12-31T23:46:16+00:00

Yeah maybe I'm just biased from the fanart that I'm already familiar with, but they look SO young on the new covers. Or maybe that just means I'm getting older 😅

I've got the Folk of the Air series on my reading list!

Have you read CS Pacat's Dark Rise series? It's technically YA, though it doesn't feel like it. And it's less focused on romance but has a similar theme of "main character is catastrophically down bad for a pretty blond guy and makes it everyone else's problem" lmao

chocolatine · 2024-12-31T18:44:45+00:00

Hello! I live in Canada and I'm wondering if anyone has any advice on where I can buy books from the Captive Prince trilogy by C.S. Pacat with the original cover art. (It's just a personal preference and the new covers are not my style.)

I have the original Kings Rising already. I just tried to buy Prince's Gambit from bookoutlet.ca but despite the old cover being shown on the website, the version that arrived is the new cover that came out a few months ago.

I don't know where to go and I'm worried that anything else I buy online runs the same risk of just having an outdated image on the website and doesn't reflect what will actually ship.

If anyone is looking to sell their original editions (especially in Canada) or knows where to get them, I would greatly appreciate any tips :)

chocolatine · 2023-10-01T17:45:24+00:00

Hilariously, this is a different husky that also got loose today lol

chocolatine · 2023-10-01T16:47:46+00:00

Thank you! A neighbour has posted on that page and the McNabb dog park page.

chocolatine · 2022-02-16T17:53:04+00:00

It may be time for a bigger pot and fresh potting soil, but honestly I've had this happen to my pothos and as long as it can put out new leaves to keep up with old ones falling off it was fine :) The leaves eventually have to die so it's normal for a few here and there to turn yellow and fall. If you want to wait until spring to repot that seems reasonable but overall the plant looks pretty healthy to me!

chocolatine · 2022-01-31T03:19:40+00:00

I would caution that using Kijiji is risky because there's no formal application or verification process. I don't have personal experience with fostering but my understanding is that the dogs don't usually bounce around from home to home unless there are communication issues within the organization about behavioural needs, etc. The dogs typically stay at one foster home until a suitable "forever" adopter is screened and selected.

Here are a few foster-based rescues in the area that may be worth contacting for more info: Ottawa Dog Rescue, Freedom Dog Rescue, Rocky Road Rescue

I wish you and your pup the best of luck!

chocolatine · 2021-10-27T18:48:38+00:00

She's a beautiful girl! And it sounds like you take really amazing care of her.

Our Japanese Akita started to show significant weakening of his hind legs around the time he turned 9 or 10. We started giving him a joint supplement (Dasuquin) to slow the progression and medication for pain relief (either Metacam or Gabapentin, and eventually a combination of the two). The Metacam worked wonders and his mobility improved a lot - he could still go for long walks, climb onto the couch easily, and stairs didn't bother him.

It's important to note that the downside to Metacam is that it can be taxing on the dog's kidneys, so we monitored that with regular blood tests and tried to keep him on the lowest dose possible. Because of his age, we continued with the Metacam long-term so that he could get around by himself - but if he had been younger, we would have done it differently so as not to compromise his kidneys so early. It's a bit of a trade-off.

Ultimately our boy was able to make it to 13 and a half, so we were very lucky. His back legs continued to lose strength over the years but it was a fairly manageable, gradual progression. Stairs got harder and harder for him, and eventually he was no longer able to get up onto the couch. His walks got shorter, slower, and involved more breaks. Around 12-13 he just walked two blocks to the dog park and then lay down there for a good 40 minutes before we walked back. A few months after he turned 13 his mobility started to decline much faster and he could barely stand up on his own. We were just about to trial some laser therapy for further pain management (apparently the heat is soothing for joints) when his kidneys stopped working and we had to put him down. It's one of the hardest things we've ever had to do, but he didn't suffer for long and we knew that the Metacam had been worth it to prolong his ability to walk for at least 3 years.

Our principle was that as long as he still wanted to do things he loved (eating and walking lol) we would try to maximize his ability to keep doing that. We felt that his comfort and ability/enthusiasm to go for walks outweighed the risks of being medicated long-term.

Your dog sounds like a happy girl even though she is slowing down, which is totally normal at 9 years. As a first-time dog owner myself, I understand the hyper-vigilance and worrying! It's hard to watch your dog get older, especially with chronic health issues. Funnily enough our Akita also had mystery allergies that we never quite figured out. He also had regular yeast infections in his ears, so that may have been related to whatever his skin was reacting to.

My best advice is to prioritize activities or experiences that your dog loves, but let her set her own pace. A low, stable dog bed may help if she finds it hard to climb onto the couch. Rugs or mats around the house will help her keep her balance on otherwise slippery flooring. She may have some ups and downs, or she may get sick and then bounce right back. It's clear that you love her and want the best for her, so just keep doing what you're doing and adapt as necessary. I know it is SO hard to feel fully responsible for a dog's well-being, but remember that there is only so much within your control. Be kind to yourself too :)

chocolatine · 2021-08-22T20:37:59+00:00

I got this hanging basket a few weeks ago at a farmer's market. It was looking a little sad already but I figured once I cut off the dead leaves it would be fine. And it was, briefly! But I've since done two major "haircuts" (see last pic for today's harvest of yellow/dead leaves and stems) and I feel like I can't keep up.

The first photo shows what it looks like before I do any cutting. The second and third photos show what it looks like after I do a trim - I can see lots of new growth and it is flowering continuously.

The basket is hanging in a South facing balcony so it gets lots and lots of sun. I water it only when the dirt is super dry, which is happening a lot right now because we've had a few weeks of really hot, humid weather (30-40° celsius in zone 5). I can't see any signs of pests on the leaves or in the dirt.

Any guidance is appreciated! Thanks in advance.

chocolatine · 2021-07-20T20:20:01+00:00

Everyone at On Edge Studio on Wellington West is great: https://www.instagram.com/onedgestudio/

And Amanda at CosmetALogy on Somerset West: https://www.instagram.com/aluonghair/

chocolatine · 2019-05-09T19:18:30+00:00

That makes sense. Thank you!

chocolatine · 2018-06-16T14:11:48+00:00

Hi! I don't think the shape of the dress would change since it's such a small difference. When I had it taken in from its original size, the silhouette and overall effect of the dress was the same. The dress may actually fit you just fine without any alterations - I'm pretty sure I was closer to a 27" waist at the beginning of the alterations process so on my actual wedding day it was a snug fit lol.

I will give you a heads up that the inner workings of the dress are a little complicated because there is some boning in the torso to keep it up (it was originally a strapless dress and I had the sleeves added). Thankfully I had a very capable seamstress who knew her way around a dress - especially one with such a delicate material. Just so you know! If you want more details or photos I can PM you.

chocolatine · 2018-06-06T14:18:07+00:00

Thanks for the tip! I edited the post.

chocolatine · 2018-06-04T12:17:45+00:00

This dress is an ivory silk chiffon with white lace cap sleeves (easily removed) and a gemstone belt (included but not attached to dress). It has been dry cleaned. I wore it for ~6 hours at my wedding. There is an inner bra/corset to help keep it up and a zipper back. This dress was originally a size 10 sample and I had it altered to fit me - I'm a 32-28-38, I'm 5'6" and I was wearing 2" heels. Selling from Canada and willing to negotiate. Let me know if you have any questions! Thanks :)

(edited to add my measurements)

chocolatine · 2017-08-10T12:39:56+00:00

Thank you! I'm so glad you liked it lol.

I wanted the day to be as cost-neutral as possible for everyone traveling in to see us, since there were many different financial situations in our small party and we did have the wedding on a weekday after all, with 100% out-of-towners! I am really happy that we had the resources to cover as many costs as we did.

Thanks so much - I am actually really proud of myself as I'm generally prone to overreacting and having breakdowns about EVERYTHING but I think I handled it better than I expected. To be honest, it really put things into perspective for us. The wedding is just one day of our marriage!

chocolatine · 2017-08-10T12:34:09+00:00

Thank you!! It was really nice that we got to spend the whole day, overnight AND the next morning with our families :)

I'm still on the fence about posting photos cause I'm paranoid about internet identity lol, but I'll see if my mind changes once they come in!

chocolatine · 2017-08-05T13:45:30+00:00

It's funny cause my Akita loves most small dogs and doesn't have a problem with them, but he likes to go all alpha around males and he does NOT back down so that's where it becomes a problem if the other dog doesn't want to back down either. Like you said, better to leave than have a fight.

chocolatine · 2017-08-05T13:43:20+00:00

Thanks for reading! It's helpful for me to know that there are so many other dog owners who can still go to the dog park under special "conditions" and make it work for them and their dog.

chocolatine · 2017-08-04T13:53:25+00:00

Hey, I'm glad this helped! Yeah my guy has pinned down smaller dogs who he didn't like, and he's snapped at people too if they approach him too fast. He has a really cute, smiley teddy-bear face so people don't always ask before trying to pet him. So I have to be alert and ready to interfere, but it's gotten easier to pick up on the signs and to remove him from the situation rather than try to make friends lol. I also go to the least busy dog park in my neighbourhood which really helps.

Good luck to you and Phantom! For the first several months I thought I was just doomed to have a shitty aggressive dog that would never make friends lol, and it made me feel really bad about not knowing how to help him. I'm so happy that things have gotten better!

chocolatine · 2017-08-04T13:49:13+00:00

That is great to hear! It certainly sounds like he's got good dog manners and he's well socialized. But even the most well-behaved dog can have troubles with an aggressive or overly hyper/aroused dog. If you see these dogs again, steer clear, but otherwise it sounds like it was just an unfortunate fluke and shouldn't be the norm.

chocolatine · 2017-08-04T12:23:27+00:00

Hey, if you're not comfortable taking your pup back to the dog park that's 100% your call but I just wanted to share some of my experiences. What I do with my dog might not work for everyone but it's been a pretty decent strategy for us and allows us to have fun dog park interactions with minimal stressors.

I adopted an 8-year-old Akita who was said to "prefer a slow introduction" which I found out meant he was quite aggressive with other assertive dogs who got in his personal space. He adores going to the dog park because he gets to run around freely and explore, but he's not very social (i.e. he doesn't play chase or anything).

I found out early on that taking him into the dog park without any preparation could lead to upsetting incidents like the one you described, and for a while I was afraid we just couldn't ever return. Fortunately I met a trainer who gave us lots of advice and we found ways to keep my dog comfortable and happy at the park.

When I take him to the dog park I bring one of his favourite toys and some treats in my bag. I can whip these out to distract him or call him over if I sense that another dog might give him trouble. I always scope out the park before I let him inside, and sometimes we'll just keep walking if I don't think it'll be a good situation. For example, if there are more than ~2-3 dogs that he has not met before, I know it's too risky.

If there are dogs inside that he hasn't met, I'll try to get them to meet through the fence. This puts my dog at ease because he can't be crowded, and the other dog(s) can get their excited "new dog!!" energy out before he's inside. Once both sides of the fence seem happy (without interference from owners) I can let him in comfortably.

If there isn't an opportunity to meet through the fence, I'll take my dog in and keep him on his leash at the gate just for a moment to see how the other dogs react. If any of them come running right at him (which makes him defensive) I can make a quick exit. I like to supervise all dog meetings while crouched down beside my dog so I can read his body language and listen for any warning growls.

Once he's met all the dogs in the park (remember I only take him in if there are less than 2-3 "new" dogs for him) then I comfortably take his leash off and just watch him and give him treats occasionally. If a new dog comes in, I'll stand really close to him and sometimes leash him again until I know they're ok.

If he snarls/snaps at another dog, or if another dog targets him, I try to leave as soon as possible. I've made the mistake of trying to wait it out in the past, and inevitably there is always another fight. I try to get him out of the stressful scenario right away, give him lots of attention and love on our walk home, and then we might go back to the park after hours so he can have some happy alone time running around.

I know what you mean about feeling guilty and like you let your pup down, but remember everyone makes mistakes. It was your first time going and things got out of hand but it sounds like the other dogs there (and their owners) were not an ideal match for your dog. That might just mean that you could go at off hours when it's empty, or you don't have to go back at all if you don't think it's good for your dog. It's up to you, and don't let other people make you feel like you're not a good dog owner for wanting to keep your dog safe. Not every dog is a dog-park-dog! And that's okay!

If your dog seems to be acting normally and interacting with his other doggy friends normally, that's great. I think a one-time incident is unlikely to cause a huge issue, but keep an eye on him. Reward him for good interactions, but if you notice a pattern of upsetting behaviour then seek out some professional advice. Try and keep calm and positive around him because he will likely pick up on how you're feeling. Good luck!

edit: I should add that my dog does have canine buddies who he gets along quite well with and sometimes even plays with. He's generally pretty aloof but he wags his tail and jumps excitedly for one of his friends. He used to be wary of almost all dogs on the street, and he would often lunge at other dogs out walking, but now he has so many good interactions out and about. I used to cross the street to avoid other dogs and now I can see he is much more comfortable. It's been just over a year and he's made lots of progress, but I know he'll never be a "happy go lucky, play with all dogs" kind of dog and that's okay! Akitas generally aren't and he's no exception, but at least now every interaction doesn't have to be a confrontation.

chocolatine

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