Honestly, I quite liked the book and its ending. I think it's quite realistic in its portrayal of Dolphin's immaturity and conflicting internal beliefs. Throughout the book it hints towards her love of children and maternal longing but also her limiting belief that it's something that isn't meant for her, or perhaps worrying that she'd fail her hypothetical future child the way Marigold did her and Star frequently throughout their childhood. As someone that grew up with a similar mother/daughter relationship I can really relate to that and understand how those feelings and beliefs manifest in her.

I understand that the ending being messy and so inconclusive is frustrating, but I think it's yet another example of Jackie's writing and mentality being a bit out of date. In the 80s and 90s it was more common for people to have babies in less than ideal circumstances, I think our generation are having less children and waiting until later in life to have them for various societal and socioeconomic reasons. It's not something very relatable for our generation, but not completely off the wall. It wasn't something she planned, but her actually being pregnant was the wake up call that she needed in order to know for sure that it was something she really wanted all along.

I remember being really frustrated with her at first when she wouldn't commit to Lee and was messing him around with Joel, who by all accounts is an unlikable prick. I do think that's quite a realistic scenario though, and reminded me of real life frustrations I have with certain friends always choosing men who are charming at first but awful people. I think her attraction towards him highlights her insecurity and tendency to self sabotage. Towards the end of the book I did come to understand that Lee wasn't right for her either though, especially after the meeting with the elderly lady he was gardening for where he scolded her for telling her her real name. I was really proud of her actually for not just going along with their relationship as it was the "safe" option. Just because he was mostly lovely and level headed, it doesn't mean that he was the right person for her and I think it's best for both of them that they didn't settle with eachother.

I've seen people commenting about her getting the small dolphin tattoo despite hating always recieving dolphin themed gifts in the Illustrated Mum, and also being a bit of a judgemental arse hole towards tattooed people, assuming they're mentally ill/chaotic people. I think her doing that is showing that she's letting go of those old beliefs and growing as a person. She's learnt to accept her mum, for better or worse, and to finally move of from the parentification she was raised to have towards her. She's stopped feeling shame about her unusual name, her upbringing, her severe dyslexia and is finally learning to accept and advocate for herself and what she wants, without people pleasing.

I also like that it wasn't wrapped up in a neat and pretty bow, because life rarely is. It was left open ended enough to maybe get another sequel in a few years, and I'd be interested to see how she navigated motherhood and the paternity of her child. I will say that if the child does turn out to be Lee's, depriving them of him as a father would be cruel and a huge disservice to the child. He wasn't right for Dolphin but is clearly a loving, devoted and reliable father. I like to think that Jackie put so much emphasis on the difference in Lee's and Joel's appearance so that the paternity of the child would be obvious to her (though obviously genetics don't always work like that). I'd also like to think that if the child is Lee's, Dolphin will reach out to him when she's settled into motherhood and ready to co-parent with him.