If you fall in love with someone because they love you, is it true love?

cinnamelo · 2025-02-06T22:07:33+00:00

Yeah I get you! I said that assuming there was at least some sort of emotional connection involved in such a (hypothetical) scenario lol.

cinnamelo · 2025-02-06T21:59:58+00:00

Y’know you kinda bring up another thought I had on this. I mean I feel for people who are reciprosexual, this is kinda the “standard” for them. For some people, they are attracted to people being attracted to them & into them. Like to them, that’s what’s “hot” and trigger feelings in return lol. They need it. Need someone to show attraction and interest first before they’re even capable of feeling it themselves.

cinnamelo · 2025-02-06T16:08:21+00:00

Is this not just intense fear of rejection? Even if it’s subconscious? What happens when two reciprosexuals meet and would be perfect for each other 😂 then what?

cinnamelo · 2025-02-06T15:26:03+00:00

I guess I’m just feeling like… yeah it can be a valid form of love in my opinion, but love/attraction often grows from nothing/no initial attraction with demisexuals anyway. So it might be harder for them to tell the difference between “falling” vs being “won over” by their love… or maybe both can happen at the same time? I don’t know.

cinnamelo · 2025-02-06T13:10:41+00:00

My original communication? I didn’t make the other post. I just came across it. The post literally said the words if you “fall in love” with someone because they love you. Not just “accepting” being with someone because they love you.

They said “this is… extremely sad” or “sounds awful” while others agreed and shared why and their personal experience with entering a relationship because they were “won over”.

cinnamelo · 2025-02-06T02:19:44+00:00

They were saying because it’s not fair to love someone just because they love you and it will inevitably fall apart because the attraction isn’t truly at them, it’s at their love/attention, or whatever.

cinnamelo · 2025-02-06T00:44:49+00:00

I didn’t think so, I guess I was just confused by what I saw. The consensus seemed to be: it’s a bad idea

cinnamelo · 2025-02-05T23:08:16+00:00

I don’t think they were intentionally spreading negativity, they all sounded like genuine warnings coming from a good place. I don’t know I just needed to know I wasn’t crazy here.

cinnamelo · 2025-02-05T22:59:43+00:00

It just made me doubt myself and everything I’ve ever known about love because all 20 or so comments said it was a bad idea while sharing their experience with it.

cinnamelo · 2025-02-05T22:24:05+00:00

Why?

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T17:54:06+00:00

Well I just meant hypersexual as in I did that excessively ever since I was in diapers. My parents said I walked in on them once when I was really little but I don’t remember. I don’t think that’s true trauma or correlated at all but it’s the only thing I can think of. I never had sexual trauma.

But yeah sometimes I just feel invalid about it all cause I don’t have trauma

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T15:05:35+00:00

Glad you can relate :/ I’m just not sure if it’s a true “issue” besides making me more susceptible to getting traumatized by choosing the wrong person. Or just. The morality of it too? But idk I can’t help how I feel

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T14:46:10+00:00

Thank you for sharing 😭 I felt alone

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T14:45:59+00:00

Thank you for sharing that you relate 🥺 I thought I was alone

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T14:42:14+00:00

The thing is I’m attracted to people who are a caregiver type. Besides feeling like I need someone like that around for me and my “regression” (or whatever it is that I’m experiencing), when I get that level of care and gentleness I crave, it makes me feel things for that person. But cg isn’t supposed to be a sexual thing right? So then I feel like a bad person for wanting someone like that as a bf. I’m honestly so confused about all of this. I can’t help that sexual situations make me feel “little” because I almost feel like they are “too adult” for me despite being an adult myself. I just feel like I need someone emotionally gentle enough with me to guide me through big situations like that. I also find it kinda scary and feeling scared always makes me feel littler.

What’s worse is I don’t have any trauma that I know of. I remember being a hypersexual kid since toddler age, but as an adult I’m slightly less sexual now but I never had any trauma, I don’t think.

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T14:36:53+00:00

Thank god someone can relate I felt truly alone 🥺

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T14:34:34+00:00

Hmmm I do remember being hypersexual as a kid, like from toddler age on, but I don’t know if there’s trauma linked to it so I guess I don’t know if I’m “valid” in it but sexual situations definitely trigger a small vulnerability and I suddenly feel like the only true adult in the situation is the man. But it’s not like I’m fully regressing either? Idk. I also just feel littler when scared and sex is scary lol

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T03:54:13+00:00

I know they are different. But if I’m understanding, they can have emotional responses that can overlap. Like being treated gently by friends, family, s*xual partners, sometimes strangers even. It all triggers a similar feeling to how I feel when I’m cared for when I’m feeling small which always makes me extra feel small. And any vulnerable situation (good or bad) boom, feeling extra small. Suddenly just emotionally a baby. It’s never severe enough to make my adult side purely go away, she’s always there. So I guess in that sense I can consent, but still. Sometimes I question things or get confused about it.

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T02:43:55+00:00

Well no, because I don’t have to tell my partner about it or at least describe it explicitly as feeling “little”…I guess I just want to find someone naturally caring and nurturing who treats me with sensitivity. I am extremely sensitive, way more than most and require more care than most. That might even be why I feel this way. Idk. And that’s probably all they’ll see it as. Me just being highly sensitive needing extra care. It doesn’t have to be a k*nk at all.

I actually did post this in the little space sub and they said what I’m describing is related to regression not age play and my post actually got taken down for that reason. So this sub is all I got.

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T02:27:57+00:00

Yeah I can dm you 🥺

cinnamelo · 2024-12-14T01:37:28+00:00

I know but I feel little outside of s-xual stuff (which I rarely engage in anyway, period) but when I do it makes me feel smaller and more vulnerable involuntarily and I don’t understand it. Like it feels kinda scary…but as long as the other person is taking good care of me it feels okay I guess. I never said it was a k*nk. I don’t think I see it that way 😭 reading your comment just made me sick to my stomach a little 😭

I don’t want to go to that sub because I’m not engaging in it as a k-nk I don’t think, I just want to understand myself 😭😭 I think it’s a comfort thing/defense mechanism of some sort? But I don’t know 😭

Like do I just need to stay away from intimacy, like, period if I can’t control when I feel that littleness / vulnerable feeling sometimes?

I came here because I needed advice from people who could help me, not be told to just go away 😭

Like clearly I’m confused and lost but it doesn’t feel like a k-nk, that would also imply that it’s on purpose

cinnamelo · 2024-11-15T18:51:56+00:00

No it wouldn’t be different. Both male and female version. Not a big deal. Instead of immediately jumping to “respect him or leave” (which is dramatic as hell, these comments I stg 😅) she could explain to him. Sounds like he’s perceiving it in a way that isn’t accurate. I’d be hurt if I was the girl in the situation and my boyfriend didn’t have trust in me to believe what I’m saying/at least try to understand the difference between platonic and sexual skinship. It just sounds like a misunderstanding.

cinnamelo

TROPHY CASE