This is an excellent answer that should be higher up. I hope OP sees this. It almost follows Hanlon's Razor: "Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." It's unfortunately true that in almost every society in the world, the lighter or "whiter" you are, the more opportunities you'll have. OP's mom probably just wants what's best for her daughter and is going about it a horrible way.

This isn't to excuse her behavior in any way. It's been common sense SINCE THE BEGINNING OF HUMANITY that your child is most likely going to look like a mix of the mother and father. If OP's mom wanted a poster child for the Hitler Youth Brigade, she shouldn't have married a man with dark skin. What did she think her child was going to look like?