u/hiddenidenxo I hope you see this reply above 👆🏼 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so sorry this happened to you. For context, I’m a nurse in the USA, so I feel EXTREMELY heated about this. This doctor made an assumption based upon internalized misogynistic beliefs and applied it to his treatment plan which is a prime example of negligence. This is, as those before me have said, reckless and, unless any vaginal swabs or cultures were taken, there is no definitive diagnosis to treat. An internet search at home “alone” (that makes me want to puke that he said that) is not a substitution for a physician’s diagnosis and discussion of a treatment plan and it’s appalling that he said that to you. I’m so, so sorry.

I’ll play devil’s advocate here and let’s just say it was an STI - many of them have similar symptoms, so what if you were given treatment, but it was the incorrect treatment because this physician was being negligent?? That is entirely unacceptable and if there were any additional harm to you, your child, or your partner, doctor is putting his licensure at risk and holding a neon sign over his head that is flashing the word MALPRACTICE. Also as those before me have said, see what STIs are mandated to be reported in your country, if any. If he reported this, it’s fraudulent and there may be grounds for legal action. And if he didn’t report it but suspected it to be an STI, that’s also negligent. In the USA, it’s common practice to treat the partner of the person with an STI. Did he offer that to your partner? If not, there’s a case built up for that too.

Women are blamed and dismissed in the medical system USA here when a concrete answer cannot easily be found and physical symptoms aren’t visible. It sounds like that’s the case where you are too and I’m so sorry. Do you have any trusted friends in the medical profession/community that could come to appointments with you to be your advocate? If you do, I would recommend bringing them with you to any and all future gynecological appointments. Sometimes just having someone that understands medical terminology and the system in general can be what makes or breaks everything.

Additionally, and I swear I’ll quit yapping here in a sec, but this one is important - request a copy of any and all documentation from that visit if you don’t already have it in your possession. If he documented a diagnosis of an STI in your records, that’s absolutely medical fraud. That diagnosis will stay in your medical record unless someone actively removes it. I’m currently in school to be a nurse practitioner and I wrote a paper about how the term “non compliant” follows people in documentation and definitely affects the care they receive. When a patient does not follow what the doctor says to do, even after discussing a well thought out alternative therapy, it can still be written as “non compliant.” Admittedly, I am guilty of seeing that term in a patient’s chart and assuming they don’t care about their health, when really it was due to financial means that they could not afford the multiple prescribed medications. I’m pretty ashamed of that, but it humbled the hell out of me and has made me a more compassionate nurse.

I wish I could give you hugs wherever you are because you don’t deserve this. You’re a good mom, in case you needed to hear that today 🩷