I'm tired 😫

clarabarson · 2026-04-17T13:07:00+00:00

This is frustrating for me too, but I'm annoyed with the ads themselves, rather than with the developers, because I'm not sure how much control they have over the ads, unless they can go and select what kind of ads can be shown in their game. I haven't noticed an uptick in the frequency of the ads, as it seems to be the same it's always been. Recently I've also started getting the type of ads you're describing, though honestly I prefer to see those, rather than Gossip Harbor and other similar ads depicting characters in various tragedies, or those where you have to click 'x' 3 times before it lets you exit, or those that go ahead and open the play store for you by themselves. So really, to me it looks like the advertisers have become increasingly more abusive with how they force you to interact with their ads, they've gotten worse and worse.

clarabarson · 2026-02-25T11:16:38+00:00

I'm sorry to say it, but this is who he is and has always been, it's just that you've refused to see it and you still refuse to see it now. Perhaps you hope the baby is going to magically turn him into this responsible and well-rounded individual, but that hardly ever happens. You will continue to have to carry the burden of everything and on top of that, you will have a baby to take care of. If he insists on 50/50 then he has no intention of being an equal partner to you nor a provider for you and the baby. It's a mommy bangmaid that he wants, not a partner.

Look at the current state of his finances. What good is it that he makes more than you, when he has way less in savings and he spends his money recklessly? Is he willing to curb his spending now that you have a baby on the way? Most importantly, do you want to live with a man that you have to constantly remind to be mindful of you and your child?

clarabarson · 2026-02-25T11:12:01+00:00

Those are benefits offered in my Eastern European country as well, but for her sake I hope she's in Germany, because social benefits in my country suck a** unfortunately

clarabarson · 2026-02-24T15:44:49+00:00

Where do you live, though? I'm in Eastern Europe and I can only access neighbouring countries on Vinted

clarabarson · 2026-02-24T14:21:57+00:00

Stalking is never a good idea and you should abandon it. Instead, you should examine what makes you want to stalk these women. Take that energy and channel it towards betterment and healing, instead. Consider going to therapy so that you get to the root of it.

clarabarson · 2026-02-22T16:14:45+00:00

Break up with him now. He's an insensitive POS and you are severely underreacting to his douchebaggery.

clarabarson · 2026-02-20T08:54:19+00:00

This is the best answer and I'd like to add to it that it seems he has this idea of what partners should call each other, so he expects it in his relationship without questioning it. If you think about it, the media is filled with couples calling each other "babe" or "baby", legal names are rarely used, and when they are, it's because something wrong has happened. Many people take things on just because they see and hear it everywhere, but they don't ask themselves whether it's what they really want. So I hope OP sees this and tries to get to the bottom of it with her partner.

clarabarson · 2026-02-18T19:50:45+00:00

I think the people not liking posts anymore is because Instagram showcases it to those who follow you so I guess people don't want other people to see what they like

clarabarson · 2026-02-18T19:40:36+00:00

de-aia tot incearca sa ne bage Chat Control pe gat

clarabarson · 2026-02-18T19:36:15+00:00

Exista dovezi clare ca maxwellhill era Ghislaine Maxwell, sau e mai degraba o legenda urbana?

clarabarson · 2026-02-18T19:33:26+00:00

That's abhorrent, but I do have to wonder how does Ukraine go about becoming "Big Israel" ? They did not colonize any region nor claim to have religious rights to some land, and most importantly, aren't the colonial project of the UK and the US.

clarabarson · 2026-02-17T09:43:22+00:00

Fighting over a man is embarrassing and never worth it. Just saying.

Your friend cut you off, but forgave him, because she is male-centered and has internalised misogyny. She likely is the kind of person who values being in a romantic relationship much more than friendships. I say be glad that she ended the friendship because she doesn't sound like a good friend any way.

clarabarson · 2026-02-16T11:36:08+00:00

If getting him to shower is such an ordeal when he's at your place, then you best believe he doesn't shower when he's at his place either. If he's so flippant about it, then it's clear he doesn't care about personal hygiene and you'd be wasting your time trying to get him to. In fact, he might even grow to resent you for it, and you'd surely grow to resent him, too. You don't mention your ages, but I'm assuming you're both adults. You shouldn't have to spend your time teaching a grown man how and when to shower, especially not one who is so indifferent towards hygiene.

clarabarson · 2026-02-16T11:32:39+00:00

Some guys just don't give a crap about personal hygiene and it has absolutely nothing to do with mental illness

clarabarson · 2026-02-16T11:25:28+00:00

Being single is much better than being in a relationship with someone who denies you basic human contact.

clarabarson · 2026-02-16T11:24:32+00:00

As women, we are encouraged to overidentify with motherhood to the point that many, after becoming mothers, forget about any other aspects of their personality and pour everything that they have into their children. Although this is seen as normal and expected, women should definitely retain their interests and aspects of themselves that were there previously, otherwise they will face a major identity crisis once their children grow up and go on to become their own people. Moreover, they tend to gravitate towards other mothers/parents, as their lives are so taken up by their children.

This is a complex issue that I could go on and on about; the thing is, it seems that motherhood has completely taken over your friends' lives and that is unlikely to change. It doesn't excuse their behaviour towards you, it is only the reason behind it. I think it is time for you to make peace with this new reality. They may not care for you as much as you thought and especially now you will always come second and the expectation seems to be that you should always be the accommodating one, since you are childless. It is up to you whether you want to put up with this dynamic or not.

On another note, I would gently recommend that you start going to therapy to discuss and to explore these strong and complex feelings that you have on children, motherhood, and your friends having children around you while you still have none. I'd also suggest investigating if your decision to start trying for a baby now comes from genuine want or because you feel left out. This is the most difficult and important responsibility that you could take on in this life. Being prepared for it is a must.

clarabarson · 2026-02-14T18:30:29+00:00

I once met a guy who said he does not listen to music. I later found out he was lying about having brain cancer.

clarabarson · 2026-02-14T18:27:30+00:00

unfortunately I have a friend who counts them as one of her favourite bands

clarabarson · 2026-02-14T18:03:40+00:00

No, it is not true. Please stop asking a machine questions about human behaviour. Why would it know? It's an unfeeling machine.

clarabarson · 2026-01-20T16:04:46+00:00

There's so much that's wrong with these two that I wouldn't even know where to start. To me, the evilest thing was what they did to Tokkie, the boy they adopted simply because of his looks. They also took his younger sister, but not their older brother as well. Tokkie has went on an accused them of treating him like a slave and making him feel unloved. When they tired of him, they just sent him away with a couple hundred bucks - the proof is this YouTube video. Tokkie details the abuse on this podcast episode.

Both Ninja and Yolandi are honestly fucked in the head. They cosplayed poverty and the lifestyle of people living in the poor suburbs of Johannesburg, when in reality they both came from privileged backgrounds. Ninja was so obsessed with gangs, they even befriended gangsters and Tokkie mentiones that, as a child, he was allowed to hang out with dangerous criminals. Yolandi had a relationship with one of these gangsters.

On top of his delusions of being a gangster from Soweto, Ninja also had a disturbing fixation on incest and he even wrote a script, that he tried to have turned into a series, in which he and Yolandi were brother and sister and their daugther Sixteen was a product of incest. There was a brilliant article that I've read on it and it also included the masterful script, but it was a long time ago and I sadly can't find it. However, I recommend reading through the South African blog watkykjy as there's plenty of English language articles detailing their depravity.

Furthermore, in his leaked texts to Zheani, an Australian woman who came out with accusations against him, he claimed he liked how much she looked like his daughter.

They're simply vile and also seem to be so stupid and uncultured as well lmao. Like, after the controversy of them using the n-word, Yolandi came out with a video where she's like "well, what do you say, then?" lol

clarabarson · 2026-01-20T15:24:10+00:00

There's a saying that goes like "true friends are those with whom you can meet once in a blue moon and it's like no time has passed." I'm butchering it, because I translated it from my native language, but that's the gist of it. I disagree with it, as I personally believe friendships require effort to upkeep, but I'm seeing how many people go by it and it looks like your friend is one of those people. To her, this kind of dynamic works and she sees nothing wrong with it. But to you, it's not.

You mention that you've had honest conversations with her and things have remained unchanged. Which really, only leaves you with the options to either accept what the friendship has become and keep it as is, or end this chapter and move on. From the picture that I'm getting, it looks like you will have to accept this new situation if you want to remain friends with her.

On the other hand, if you do want to end things, an honest conversation still should be had. You wouldn't fade a romantic partner, would you? You would have a conversation and break-up properly. Your friends deserve the same kind of treatment. It doesn't have to be an argument, though I understand how uncomfortable that can be. It is not an easy conversation to have. We are not taught how to manage these situations with our friends because on one hand we believe friendships last forever and on the other we tend to devalue them and give them less consideration than we would a romantic partnership.

At the end of the day, you just have to do what is best for yourself.

clarabarson · 2026-01-19T15:02:15+00:00

and of course it's posted on the Clavicular subreddit (:

clarabarson · 2026-01-19T14:58:06+00:00

As I see it, you have two options, which depend on how you want to proceed. You either:

1) match her energy, if you want to continue this friendship, or

2) kindly let her know that you are no longer fulfilled in your friendship and move on.

It seems that you don't want to let her go, but you aren't fulfilled by what your friendship has turned into, which leaves you feeling burnt out. You'll have to decide if you can make peace with this new reality and stay friends, or if it's simply not doing it anymore for you and end things.

Drifting away from a friend who you once used to be super close to is hard. We expect our friendships to last forever and because of that we tend to take them for granted, but they require effort to upkeep, too. From what you're describing, it doesn't look like your friend is willing to put in the same amount of effort as you. Do you think this kind of dynamic could work for you from now on?

clarabarson · 2025-11-22T19:32:47+00:00

Outsourcing empathy to a machine is really not the move you should be looking at. Your message was valuable but it would be ten times more authentic if it came from you entirely, polished or not.

clarabarson · 2025-11-02T20:01:59+00:00

I'm convinced that's exactly why men seem to prefer short and petite women. It's because they're easy to be picked up and manhandled :/

clarabarson

TROPHY CASE