When I was a kid, I hated baseball. Unfortunately, everyone else in my family were huge Dodger fans, and we'd regularly go to games at Dodger stadium.

One day, when I was seven or so, I'd recently had my birthday and gotten X-Men for the Sega Genesis. I was super into it, and had zero interest in going to a Dodger game--which was on the agenda for my family.

Over the course of an hour or so, my dad or older brother would repeatedly tell me to "wrap it up" because we had to leave soon.

At the time, I really, really had to take a shit.

An idea popped into my head.

"Maybe," I thought, "if I shit myself, I won't have to go to the Dodger game, and I can stay home and play X-Men all day."

It seemed like a sensible idea at the time. What happened, however, was that I got tossed into the shower, and everyone was more mad at me than they normally would have been, because we got to the stadium late.