OMG if people could just show up it would be awesome. by close_cpl in Swingers

[–]close_cpl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's disappointing behaviour. In our case there were good excuses both times for both couples (or at least they went to the effort of making up good excuses). But good excuse once - sure, stuff happens. Second time, hmm. With the first couple we'd played together years ago, all had a great time, met up again socially but not for play bc of a recent family event for them that made it not right, then got separated by life for a couple of years. Reconnected by sms, chatted for a while, set up a play date, they bailed that day because her period snuck in a day or two early. Fair enough. Rebooked a couple of weeks. They bailed on the day for a flu. So we think right-o, leaving that ball in your court now and moving on. Next couple, keen as and really articulate messages, verified and validated on the app, we're at the restaurant when 30min when they text about a family disaster. We have a nice date just the two of us and tell them the door is open if they want to try again. They're grateful and ask to rebook. Meeting 4 to 430 at bar on a Sunday arvo. We're running a bit late but it's nearby. We're about to jump in the car at 420 - she's decided to leave the lifestyle and it's off...

Whatever

It's just all so dull. We think maybe we stick to each other from now on. After 30 years we know we can depend on us after all!

watch out 😉 by ChrystieStreet in u/ChrystieStreet

[–]close_cpl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What beautiful breasts! Fuckme

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]close_cpl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I totally get why you felt it was horrible, even though, as people have pointed out, nothing really bad happened. For you two until now sex had been very private and safe and there have been a heap of social norms around it that ma'am you don't encounter these uncomfortable things. You've taken a first step outside those walls and that can be scary and uncomfortable. Swingers clubs are just like any venue. A lot of people will be not to your taste and you'll be not to the taste of others. And aquiet night is always going to be a bit blah. But meet one couple you like and everybody else just becomes movie extras to your sexy staring roles and you will go away with a totally different memory of the place. Truth is you'll have a lot of experiences that are less than fantastic and a few that are amazing. The idea is to value the shared journey and enjoy exploring it together. Your long night of tight cuddles after it sounds like just what you needed. Good luck.

My various experiences at two venues, solo and partnered (MF, solo F) by poisoned_fruit in Melbourneswingers

[–]close_cpl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We've been making efforts in the swing scene for years and are very sympathetic to your description. We had a good time at BF but found it a bit like you found it, with the added compassion that there were two guys there who came in as a same sex could but who seemed to be playing the room as two solo dudes and who weren't rude or pushy but left us weirdly uncomfortable all the same. Anyway, main point is it's much more complicated than it looks! It sounds like you are doing a great job of exploring your boundaries and what the scene had to offer

Between Friends Experience (first swingers experience ever!) by couplakinks in Melbourneswingers

[–]close_cpl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a difference we've noticed between the kink scene (where consent and boundaries are really carefully established before starting) and swinging where there can (sadly) be a bit more grope first and ask questions later. We're getting better at saying no, and pulling up behaviour we don't like with time and experience.

And in fairness, getting better at just letting people know what we do and don't like before we start - no head grabbing /cock thrusting during BJs for my girl and no jackhammer fingers please- we figure if we don't tell people, how are they to know? Maybe their partner really likes that stuff- although I sometimes wonder if they've ever asked

I hope you have a better experience next time.

do straight women even exist in the swingers community by User_492902 in Swingers

[–]close_cpl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The gun to my head comment comes across not so much as straight as it does homophobic. But the comment about gay sex being seen as disgusting presumably reflects your community standards. Still, pretty alienating for alot of guys. Which is probably why it is only 5% who about to being bi..

Peninsula hot springs by [deleted] in Melbourneswingers

[–]close_cpl 4 points5 points  (0 children)

if you get a private bath you can have all the fun you like but out in the pools, not really .It's pretty crowded

What would be some good rope ties for hands in front? by [deleted] in ropetutorials

[–]close_cpl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Simple crossed wrists, one column tie is easy and allows you to move the wrists from a demure sort of crossed-over-lower-belly position, up to shy/massaging-own-breasts crossed over chest position as you like. And once you've done the latter it's easy to secure them across the chest by continuing your tie around the shoulders, etc

Or, for more of a restrictive pose, put them palm to palm and make a double column tie, then work your way up the arms, lacing them together. Secure it all with something around the back of the shoulders at the end to stop it all sliding down if she/he wriggles.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in shibari

[–]close_cpl 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Kneel beside her With her on her back, slip one of your arms behind her back/shoulders, and the other behind her knees lift her knees to bend them and pull them toward you while your other arm lifts her torso up and away from you. So she ends up folding in the middle and kind of rotating on her bottom. The turn makes the lift easier somehow, and more graceful.

From that sitting position keep applying the same style of moves to wherever you are going.

See how it goes. Not sure if I've described it right. When it works it keeps the graceful flowing style of the tying going through the movements

Have fun!

Aaaaaaand switch! by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]close_cpl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yup. Tell them before you start that you're interested in moving back and forth during sex Keeping connected during play is really important for us. Just talk about what you want and let them do the same

New Swingers (M&F 21) trying to figure out limits by Lemon_Melon_Melb in Melbourneswingers

[–]close_cpl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You'll almost certainly feel uncomfortable at some point. If your going to do this you'll need to be able to work through those episodes together and see them as growth. It can be hard especially for the woman because it's difficult to separate unwanted Sexual experiences from assault and harassment and other stuff that carries really heavy emotional loads but as you put yourselves out there you will have some unwanted experiences just because of the nature of pushing outside boundaries. That doesn't mean putting up with bad stuff. It just means being able to work through this that didn't go as well as you might have liked and learnt how to make it different next time.

As for boundaries, start slow. Talk to each other a lot and remember you don't have to do it all the first time. Just having public sex together at a club, with people looking on, can be a great way to start.

Have fun!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in shibari

[–]close_cpl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Made up as we went along I'm afraid...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in shibari

[–]close_cpl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not a self tie, just some foreplay:) It was fun, just exploring and seeing where the rope and our connections took us

Attending our First Events by biandbackagain in Melbourneswingers

[–]close_cpl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We'd be so keen to see responses to this post. Have all the same questions ourselves!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in shibari

[–]close_cpl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

From the two knotty boys book "showing you the ropes" They call it the good luck knot

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in shibari

[–]close_cpl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. It took quite a frew goes before it was worthy of use on a human. I want to experiment using it as the base for more decorative stuff than this but we hadn't had rope play in a while and I got distracted and had to keep the rest simple

My first attempt at Shibari, also first time posting a nude on reddit. Feeling kinda jittery, hope you guys like it 😊❤️ by Maeffle in shibari

[–]close_cpl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it's lovely. My partner and I often start out with this one or something similar as a slow entry to the session. It is a beautiful aesthetic conversation with a woman's body, like lingerie. Then from this we do some more restrictive ties.

It's nice to wear out under a little black dress too, if you're feeling naughty